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Porn is purely selfish pleasure. Thus, when a person is married, they're used to being selfish about their sexual pleasure, resulting in strife. And when people

by jerrac 12y ago

Porn is purely selfish pleasure. Thus, when a person is married, they're used to being selfish about their sexual pleasure, resulting in strife. And when people think about getting married, they realize that would require them to stop being so selfish, since marriages don't last unless you are willing to sacrifice your own desires in order to help your spouse. So, porn is a cause, or at least, part of a cause. As for marriage being an economic institution... Not really. Male and female are different. We think differently, our bodies are different, and so on. In most cases, those differences complement each other. So, marriage is the joining of two people into a partnership that lets them cover each others flaws.

selmnoo 12y ago
I think it's crucially important to note that even if folks watch porn, it doesn't mean they can't have a successful marriage. My thinking is it would actually probably help to make a conscious decision to stop watching porn or at least reduce to a healthy minimum (insofar as it is an activity that may make a man and a woman more distant and aloof), and look instead to rebuilding a healthy physical relationship [1]. The reason I feel the need to emphasize this is that I think it's pretty much a matter of fact these days that many people watch porn. They should not start thinking now that they'll have trouble with marriage because of their porn habits, rather they should focus on what can be done to prepare for a successful marriage and commit to that. [1]: Somehow I'm expecting people to get nitpicky on me on this, so let me just preemptively say: if within the framework of your relationship watching porn is acceptable to you and your significant other, then bless you both, keep doing it.
aikah 12y ago
> Porn is purely selfish pleasure. Some couples watch porn together.You make it "a selfish pleasure" only if you want it "a selfish pleasure". And yes,women watch porn,like they buy dildos, though they might not be interested in "Bangbros like gonzo" ,but something with a higher production quality.
- stevewilhelm 12y ago
  HBO's 'Game of Thrones' for example.
baddox 12y ago
Is a virgin who doesn't view pornography likely to be any less selfish or any more successful in a marriage?
maratd 12y ago
> Porn is purely selfish pleasure. Thus, when a person is married, they're used to being selfish about their sexual pleasure, resulting in strife. Are you married? For that matter, have you actually had sex? You and your wife can enjoy sex without you putting any additional effort into it. The mechanics of it kinda guarantee that. In fact, that's probably a massive difference between actual sex and what it portrayed in porn. When you're with somebody, you don't take turns ... they do that in porn because two people can't really fit into the shot. In real life there are no turns, you're both having fun at the same time. > So, porn is a cause, or at least, part of a cause. Porn isn't the cause. The parent is right. It's entirely rooted in economics and self-interest. On top of what's already mentioned, there are heavy penalties for a male if the marriage ends. Child-support, alimony, 50% of your property, custody of children, etc. So not too much upside on a successful marriage and heavy penalties on a failed one ... not surprising many men are choosing to opt out. There are, of course, good reasons to still marry, but the answer isn't as clear-cut as it was before.
waps 12y ago
There's this thing called aging. It's really quite a universal problem. It means that if you marry for sex, it's not going to last. Skipping it also leads to not lasting though.

by jerrac 12y ago

selmnoo 12y ago

I think it's crucially important to note that even if folks watch porn, it doesn't mean they can't have a successful marriage. My thinking is it would actually probably help to make a conscious decision to stop watching porn or at least reduce to a healthy minimum (insofar as it is an activity that may make a man and a woman more distant and aloof), and look instead to rebuilding a healthy physical relationship [1]. The reason I feel the need to emphasize this is that I think it's pretty much a matter of fact these days that many people watch porn. They should not start thinking now that they'll have trouble with marriage because of their porn habits, rather they should focus on what can be done to prepare for a successful marriage and commit to that. [1]: Somehow I'm expecting people to get nitpicky on me on this, so let me just preemptively say: if within the framework of your relationship watching porn is acceptable to you and your significant other, then bless you both, keep doing it.

aikah 12y ago

> Porn is purely selfish pleasure. Some couples watch porn together.You make it "a selfish pleasure" only if you want it "a selfish pleasure". And yes,women watch porn,like they buy dildos, though they might not be interested in "Bangbros like gonzo" ,but something with a higher production quality.

stevewilhelm 12y ago
HBO's 'Game of Thrones' for example.

baddox 12y ago

Is a virgin who doesn't view pornography likely to be any less selfish or any more successful in a marriage?

maratd 12y ago

> Porn is purely selfish pleasure. Thus, when a person is married, they're used to being selfish about their sexual pleasure, resulting in strife. Are you married? For that matter, have you actually had sex? You and your wife can enjoy sex without you putting any additional effort into it. The mechanics of it kinda guarantee that. In fact, that's probably a massive difference between actual sex and what it portrayed in porn. When you're with somebody, you don't take turns ... they do that in porn because two people can't really fit into the shot. In real life there are no turns, you're both having fun at the same time. > So, porn is a cause, or at least, part of a cause. Porn isn't the cause. The parent is right. It's entirely rooted in economics and self-interest. On top of what's already mentioned, there are heavy penalties for a male if the marriage ends. Child-support, alimony, 50% of your property, custody of children, etc. So not too much upside on a successful marriage and heavy penalties on a failed one ... not surprising many men are choosing to opt out. There are, of course, good reasons to still marry, but the answer isn't as clear-cut as it was before.

waps 12y ago

There's this thing called aging. It's really quite a universal problem. It means that if you marry for sex, it's not going to last. Skipping it also leads to not lasting though.