They are, but they're not quite this expensive. This isn't just a rocket, it's a rocket with paperwork certifying USAF involvement and EELV contracting and var

They are, but they're not quite this expensive. This isn't just a rocket, it's a rocket with paperwork certifying USAF involvement and EELV contracting and various oversight instruments, and manufactured by ULA, the consortium we allowed to become a monopoly, which will offer jobs to everyone involved in this process after they retire from government service. Private telecom satellites, which are in fact an open market, go for any of the Russian, Chinese, or European launchers, and recently for SpaceX, because ULA's products are too expensive unless you're the US Government. ULA in this view is effectively a branch of the US space program, which is allowed to guarantee its shareholders a profit, and is protected from allegations of waste because we have NASA to use as a punching bag, they're just a 'private sector contractor'.