3 ms·

>Try to take in that message first, and when you think you have the slightest idea what it's like to live like that, maybe you are then qualified to add a respo

>Try to take in that message first, and when you think you have the slightest idea what it's like to live like that, maybe you are then qualified to add a response. How ridiculous. Just because a person isn't suffering or doesnt have a true understanding of the same agony as the blogger, doesn't mean they are not allowed to offer help. Whats so wrong with people trying to help? Should we just say - "Thanks for the insight. Now back to my own world"

polemic 12y ago
> "Whats so wrong with people trying to help?" Because most of the 'help' is in the form of unsolicited advice, well-intended as it might be, and tends to be naive, unhelpful, disheartening, demotivating or downright insulting. OP outlines what that feels like: "These people are, in most aspects of their lives, good people. Honestly, couldn’t recommend them enough. But where my illness is concerned, they felt they had license to act like complete jackasses because they couldn’t understand what I was going through." Sure, anyone can help, but very few of the comments on here are helpful.
- bigtunacan 12y ago
  As someone with numerous debilitating diseases myself; the whole thing just doesn't ring very true with me. It was a 6 year process of being moved from specialist to specialist and every test you can imagine being run to understand what was wrong with me. During that whole time almost everyone I encountered was very sympathetic and understanding. It is also difficult as a patient not to be jaded. There are "patients" out there trying to scam the system that just want some doctor to sign a disability claim so they can collect a check without getting a job. I've met numerous individuals where this is the case. Then I see the doctors and they keep telling me that I should consider going on disability or find a less stressful line of work, because of my health. They tell me that it is only a matter of time before things get so bad I will no longer be able to make a choice. I have a friend that has terminal cancer who plans to work until he dies. There are plenty of desk jobs; if this guy can sit up playing video games and such; he can likely hold down a job.

polemic 12y ago

> "Whats so wrong with people trying to help?" Because most of the 'help' is in the form of unsolicited advice, well-intended as it might be, and tends to be naive, unhelpful, disheartening, demotivating or downright insulting. OP outlines what that feels like: "These people are, in most aspects of their lives, good people. Honestly, couldn’t recommend them enough. But where my illness is concerned, they felt they had license to act like complete jackasses because they couldn’t understand what I was going through." Sure, anyone can help, but very few of the comments on here are helpful.

bigtunacan 12y ago
As someone with numerous debilitating diseases myself; the whole thing just doesn't ring very true with me. It was a 6 year process of being moved from specialist to specialist and every test you can imagine being run to understand what was wrong with me. During that whole time almost everyone I encountered was very sympathetic and understanding. It is also difficult as a patient not to be jaded. There are "patients" out there trying to scam the system that just want some doctor to sign a disability claim so they can collect a check without getting a job. I've met numerous individuals where this is the case. Then I see the doctors and they keep telling me that I should consider going on disability or find a less stressful line of work, because of my health. They tell me that it is only a matter of time before things get so bad I will no longer be able to make a choice. I have a friend that has terminal cancer who plans to work until he dies. There are plenty of desk jobs; if this guy can sit up playing video games and such; he can likely hold down a job.