I wish someone would pay me money to write about how technology X sucks because I used it 15-20 years ago and it sucked then. I know a lot of tech that sucked

I wish someone would pay me money to write about how technology X sucks because I used it 15-20 years ago and it sucked then. I know a lot of tech that sucked 15 years ago, and not having to do anything other than give a vendor buddy free advertising by sticking a quote from them in at the end would free me of the drudgery of having to figure out the current state things.