I think reframing the way you're thinking about this would help. Instead of saying "I'm annoyed that I can't do these things arg" why not say "I've made a deci

I think reframing the way you're thinking about this would help. Instead of saying "I'm annoyed that I can't do these things arg" why not say "I've made a decision to do Y because, and I'm going to make the most of that." Next, try to evaluate whether you are succeeding in that role. Are you learning? Growing? Maybe you're not coding as much but you're learning a crap-ton about how NOT to do things, or about a business domain that has a bunch of meaty problems you can solve later. Look hard at the things you really want that make you happy (spending time with family, creating things, etc) weigh them, and use that as a new target. Unfortunately your conundrum is a constant struggle throughout life for those that want to have an impact. First, breathe and relax, and know that it is impossible to do everything all the time. Second, realize that you have a bunch of time left, and there is no formula that determines when in life you can have an impact or be successful. You'll be just fine.