5 ms·

Communities, rife as they were with gossip, ostracism and superstitious cruelty, were always based on mutual need, not on acting out some supposedly gene-based

Communities, rife as they were with gossip, ostracism and superstitious cruelty, were always based on mutual need, not on acting out some supposedly gene-based pantomime. I daresay when the next drought or plague comes along I will get to know my neighbours and we'll pull together for mutual support.

aedocw 12y ago
Honest question - why would you wait until the next draught or plague to get to know your neighbors well? Why not start getting to know them today, before you "need" them?
- prestadige 12y ago
  I wish my neighbours well, but for me socialising is a distraction from work and family. Those are my contribution to the (wider) community. Besides, I have trouble enough keeping up with relatives and schoolmates without introducing new, geographically-oriented relationships.
  - na8ur 12y ago
    I agree with coldtea. Our consumerison is why it we get isolated. What is intresting, tendencys in DE show that people go back in the cities for shopping (it's more socializing). http://www.presseportal.de/pm/8664/2804458/innenstadt-bleibt-trend-nur-jeder-fuenfte-kunde-kauft-kleidung-ausschliesslich-online/rss http://www.presseportal.de/pm/8664/2804458/innenstadt-bleibt... Maybe when our kids getting in adolescence find that this is the way to be diffrent than us. Good Practise: Start greeting people when you are in your neighbourhood. That's what I did. I got very fast in contact with above-, below my floor and people around in that block. We had big times (even with the very old folks!). Friendliness and courage (to do so) is the key to start a relationship. The cause of the problem is our missing culture (even neighbourhood parties) to get connectd. g start flash-mobs!
    - prestadige 12y ago
      I'm not a consumerist. Nor do I suffer from social anxiety. Who are you talking to, and giving advice to? Nothing in your comment addresses any of my points. Why not engage -- otherwise you remain 'isolated', surely?
- cylinder 12y ago
  Honest question - why is it considered so inherently important to spend time with your neighbors? I don't understand why I'm supposed to have a natural connection to certain individuals just because we chose to live in the same area. If my social circle consists of people who don't happen to live on my street, is that so bad? We don't really need to worry about having someone to come check up on us from next door because modern communication has extended our reach far beyond our own street. I've never really been comfortable getting to know my neighbors. I feel like they see and hear too much about my private life as it is, it's actually awkward for me to see my neighbors.
  - lutusp 12y ago
    > why is it considered so inherently important to spend time with your neighbors? It's propaganda disseminated by unhappy single women. :) I said it that way because not all single women are unhappy -- some prefer being alone, just as some men do. Recent statistics tell us that almost 1/2 of Americans are single, and they're about to become an absolute majority.
    - jiggy2011 12y ago
      What does this have with the GPs point?
      - lutusp 12y ago
        You mean, apart from answering his question?
        jiggy2011 12y ago
        What does time spent with your neighbours have to do with single women?
        lutusp 12y ago
        No, the question is, "What does an article encouraging contact with neighbors have to do with single women?"
- lutusp 12y ago
  > Why not start getting to know them today, before you "need" them? Maybe they're completely boring. Maybe the person under discussion prefers being alone unless and until the entire neighborhood is going up in smoke. It's not as though large groups of people are what nature has in mind, regardless of environmental and biological changes -- evolution doesn't work that way. About 1/2 of Americans are now single. Is this a disease, or a result of personal preferences, by people who tried the alternatives and then made the least objectionable choice?
coldtea 12y ago
>Communities, rife as they were with gossip, ostracism and superstitious cruelty, were always based on mutual need To counter your easy dismissal I'd say modern individuals, rife as they are with selfiness, consumerism, lack of empathy and of time to connect to their neighborhood, are mostly basing their circles on career paths and personal interests, and other people being their cultural split image.
- prestadige 12y ago
  How is my dismissal 'easy'? I haven't heard it from anyone else and it acknowledges an unpleasant truth. What I dismiss are sentimental media ideas about 'community' which are all too common. What both arbitrary socialising and consumerism have in common is that they are focused on selves whereas truly important activity primarily relates to abstract ideas. It is ideas that create the solutions to local problems. Btw, none of this is inconsistent with a smile and a nod to people you see about you in daily life! And mingling with new people if one feels lonely.
  - countrybama24 12y ago
    Those ideas about community aren't just sentimental, they're reflections of real human needs. Humans value community to a tremendous degree, shaped by evolutionary pressures evolving from our tribal roots. We want to feel part of a larger group, whether it is our family, neighborhood, city, company or country. This isn't a relationship born out of "creating solutions," it independently nourishes an innate emotional need.
    - prestadige 12y ago
      Oh, c'mon, the word "community" is thrown around willy nilly nowadays. Every day I read something about the "tadpole-owning community" or whatnot. It could be the other way around: we are born into families and nations and therefore we post-hoc accept and value them. We can't wait to leave and get away to the big city and then, eventually, from time to time, we yearn to return home. Not due to some innate preference or unexplained genetic mechanism but simply because that's how we grew up. However, few are willing to give up their new-found freedoms for a circumscribed tribal existence. Which doesn't mean we can't or shouldn't honour our pasts.

aedocw 12y ago

Honest question - why would you wait until the next draught or plague to get to know your neighbors well? Why not start getting to know them today, before you "need" them?

prestadige 12y ago
I wish my neighbours well, but for me socialising is a distraction from work and family. Those are my contribution to the (wider) community. Besides, I have trouble enough keeping up with relatives and schoolmates without introducing new, geographically-oriented relationships.
- na8ur 12y ago
  I agree with coldtea. Our consumerison is why it we get isolated. What is intresting, tendencys in DE show that people go back in the cities for shopping (it's more socializing). http://www.presseportal.de/pm/8664/2804458/innenstadt-bleibt-trend-nur-jeder-fuenfte-kunde-kauft-kleidung-ausschliesslich-online/rss http://www.presseportal.de/pm/8664/2804458/innenstadt-bleibt... Maybe when our kids getting in adolescence find that this is the way to be diffrent than us. Good Practise: Start greeting people when you are in your neighbourhood. That's what I did. I got very fast in contact with above-, below my floor and people around in that block. We had big times (even with the very old folks!). Friendliness and courage (to do so) is the key to start a relationship. The cause of the problem is our missing culture (even neighbourhood parties) to get connectd. g start flash-mobs!
  - prestadige 12y ago
    I'm not a consumerist. Nor do I suffer from social anxiety. Who are you talking to, and giving advice to? Nothing in your comment addresses any of my points. Why not engage -- otherwise you remain 'isolated', surely?
cylinder 12y ago
Honest question - why is it considered so inherently important to spend time with your neighbors? I don't understand why I'm supposed to have a natural connection to certain individuals just because we chose to live in the same area. If my social circle consists of people who don't happen to live on my street, is that so bad? We don't really need to worry about having someone to come check up on us from next door because modern communication has extended our reach far beyond our own street. I've never really been comfortable getting to know my neighbors. I feel like they see and hear too much about my private life as it is, it's actually awkward for me to see my neighbors.
- lutusp 12y ago
  > why is it considered so inherently important to spend time with your neighbors? It's propaganda disseminated by unhappy single women. :) I said it that way because not all single women are unhappy -- some prefer being alone, just as some men do. Recent statistics tell us that almost 1/2 of Americans are single, and they're about to become an absolute majority.
  - jiggy2011 12y ago
    What does this have with the GPs point?
    - lutusp 12y ago
      You mean, apart from answering his question?
      - jiggy2011 12y ago
        What does time spent with your neighbours have to do with single women?
        lutusp 12y ago
        No, the question is, "What does an article encouraging contact with neighbors have to do with single women?"
lutusp 12y ago
> Why not start getting to know them today, before you "need" them? Maybe they're completely boring. Maybe the person under discussion prefers being alone unless and until the entire neighborhood is going up in smoke. It's not as though large groups of people are what nature has in mind, regardless of environmental and biological changes -- evolution doesn't work that way. About 1/2 of Americans are now single. Is this a disease, or a result of personal preferences, by people who tried the alternatives and then made the least objectionable choice?

coldtea 12y ago

>Communities, rife as they were with gossip, ostracism and superstitious cruelty, were always based on mutual need To counter your easy dismissal I'd say modern individuals, rife as they are with selfiness, consumerism, lack of empathy and of time to connect to their neighborhood, are mostly basing their circles on career paths and personal interests, and other people being their cultural split image.

prestadige 12y ago
How is my dismissal 'easy'? I haven't heard it from anyone else and it acknowledges an unpleasant truth. What I dismiss are sentimental media ideas about 'community' which are all too common. What both arbitrary socialising and consumerism have in common is that they are focused on selves whereas truly important activity primarily relates to abstract ideas. It is ideas that create the solutions to local problems. Btw, none of this is inconsistent with a smile and a nod to people you see about you in daily life! And mingling with new people if one feels lonely.
- countrybama24 12y ago
  Those ideas about community aren't just sentimental, they're reflections of real human needs. Humans value community to a tremendous degree, shaped by evolutionary pressures evolving from our tribal roots. We want to feel part of a larger group, whether it is our family, neighborhood, city, company or country. This isn't a relationship born out of "creating solutions," it independently nourishes an innate emotional need.
  - prestadige 12y ago
    Oh, c'mon, the word "community" is thrown around willy nilly nowadays. Every day I read something about the "tadpole-owning community" or whatnot. It could be the other way around: we are born into families and nations and therefore we post-hoc accept and value them. We can't wait to leave and get away to the big city and then, eventually, from time to time, we yearn to return home. Not due to some innate preference or unexplained genetic mechanism but simply because that's how we grew up. However, few are willing to give up their new-found freedoms for a circumscribed tribal existence. Which doesn't mean we can't or shouldn't honour our pasts.