> But isn't it better to be weird than to be boring? That depends on your objectives, but if the goal is to make or have friends that you like to be around, I'

> But isn't it better to be weird than to be boring? That depends on your objectives, but if the goal is to make or have friends that you like to be around, I'd agree. I'm not very weird, but I have become rather more openly myself, which I'd say by definition makes me seem a bit weird at times. The result has been that most of my friends are also a little weird, or enjoy me being myself. However, I'd argue that this only works if you're honestly weird. Just yourself, really. Being quirky to mask insecurity or a boring life can often come across as annoying and fake. If your goal is to not be lonely, and not in the first place to 'be yourself' as well, I'd say a much more effective approach is to become a good listener. Everyone likes good listeners, and it's a (relatively) easy thing to learn. In my more lonely and insecure periods of life I often just asked questions and listened, and after doing just that for an entire conversation, people would often remark how wonderful the conversation was. Obviously this is not ideal in the long run, as it can be quite tedious and annoying to just listen to others, but as a basis for forming connections it's very effective. > I'm just flat out socially retarded, and desperately lonely. That sucks, and I've been there. I still find myself weird and strange, and there are still many times where I feel like the odd person in the group. Yet I've managed to somehow gather a pretty sizable collection of weirdly honest people that range from acquaintances to good friends. I don't know if I can give you good suggestions, but I do know that for me this process has been quite 'conscious' and deliberate. If you'd like to talk about this sometime, let me know! I'd be happy to chat (and/or meet in person if you happen to be nearby). Loneliness is the worst!