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The schedule the project is currently on, me taking any time would be unacceptable (it will slip). Issue with being the only developer on this effort. Could I

The schedule the project is currently on, me taking any time would be unacceptable (it will slip). Issue with being the only developer on this effort. Could I phrase it along the lines of I need a week or I need to quit? I don't even know if there is "medical leave". My life kinda exploded and I let it affect the quality of my work which I am not proud of, but it has been and it has been getting worse. I have finally told a couple friends I am struggling and they want to help (thank you).

artumi-richard 12y ago
Quitting because you are stressed and the pressure is high is one option. As you say above, taking a week off might be another option. Taking two might be better, if you can forget or put into perspective the problem at hand. Prioritise your basics. Eat properly. Go to bed early. Do some exercise. See your friends. Watch a movie. Make it your goal to have done all this for a week. Without sufficient reserves of energy & social interaction your job of getting through this is much harder. If you feel shame about things not going well, you shouldn't. Everyone you know has made up their mind about "who you are" and the outcome of your decision here will not influence that one way or the other. I'm solely responsible for all sorts of stuff and have received a few ear bashings over time. I hang on to a few facts: 1) I am variable. I cannot predict how much work I will get done in a day. I am not a machine. 2) Estimating how long a non-trivial software project will take is hard, and I should expect nearly all estimates to be wrong, and there will be consequences to that. 3) People can be unreasonable. I will on occasion have to deal with them. 4) Not everything is about me. If someone is angry on the phone, they may well have all sorts of shit going on in their lives. Don't judge. Don't take it personally. In short, shit happens, and the more I do, the more shit I have to deal with, and after a while, that's fine. You try to avoid it, but you can't. I do the best I can, sometimes that's great, and sometimes it's not so good.
vinceguidry 12y ago
> Issue with being the only developer on this effort. If that's the case, then you can't hold yourself accountable for their poor planning. If they didn't build any wiggle room into the deadline, and doesn't have any procedure in place to handle the unexpected, then they have nobody to blame but themselves when the project falls through. They're going to try to pin this on you, but it's not your fault they didn't do any of these things. But, chances are, they do have a plan B, they're just not telling you about it. Managers do this shit all the time, place unreasonable expectations on you knowing you'll "rise to the challenge". Don't feel any moral compunction to play their game.
rolfvandekrol 12y ago
"I need a week or I need to quit" Don't quit, just talk to your boss at the contracting company and tell him/her that you would like a week off, unpaid, because of personal issues. If they are worth anything as an employer, they will give it to you gladly.
mcherm 12y ago
If you had a heart attack and spent a week in the hospital, the project would just need to deal with it. Mental health issues are often not treated the same way... but they should be. If you are mentally incapable of working on the project, then they must just deal with it.

artumi-richard 12y ago

Quitting because you are stressed and the pressure is high is one option. As you say above, taking a week off might be another option. Taking two might be better, if you can forget or put into perspective the problem at hand. Prioritise your basics. Eat properly. Go to bed early. Do some exercise. See your friends. Watch a movie. Make it your goal to have done all this for a week. Without sufficient reserves of energy & social interaction your job of getting through this is much harder. If you feel shame about things not going well, you shouldn't. Everyone you know has made up their mind about "who you are" and the outcome of your decision here will not influence that one way or the other. I'm solely responsible for all sorts of stuff and have received a few ear bashings over time. I hang on to a few facts: 1) I am variable. I cannot predict how much work I will get done in a day. I am not a machine. 2) Estimating how long a non-trivial software project will take is hard, and I should expect nearly all estimates to be wrong, and there will be consequences to that. 3) People can be unreasonable. I will on occasion have to deal with them. 4) Not everything is about me. If someone is angry on the phone, they may well have all sorts of shit going on in their lives. Don't judge. Don't take it personally. In short, shit happens, and the more I do, the more shit I have to deal with, and after a while, that's fine. You try to avoid it, but you can't. I do the best I can, sometimes that's great, and sometimes it's not so good.

vinceguidry 12y ago

> Issue with being the only developer on this effort. If that's the case, then you can't hold yourself accountable for their poor planning. If they didn't build any wiggle room into the deadline, and doesn't have any procedure in place to handle the unexpected, then they have nobody to blame but themselves when the project falls through. They're going to try to pin this on you, but it's not your fault they didn't do any of these things. But, chances are, they do have a plan B, they're just not telling you about it. Managers do this shit all the time, place unreasonable expectations on you knowing you'll "rise to the challenge". Don't feel any moral compunction to play their game.

rolfvandekrol 12y ago

"I need a week or I need to quit" Don't quit, just talk to your boss at the contracting company and tell him/her that you would like a week off, unpaid, because of personal issues. If they are worth anything as an employer, they will give it to you gladly.

mcherm 12y ago

If you had a heart attack and spent a week in the hospital, the project would just need to deal with it. Mental health issues are often not treated the same way... but they should be. If you are mentally incapable of working on the project, then they must just deal with it.