3 ms·

> Many people here (myself included) claim that they are working really hard so that they can get enough money to be able to do whatever they want for the rest

> Many people here (myself included) claim that they are working really hard so that they can get enough money to be able to do whatever they want for the rest of their lives. I used to be one of those people until I realized that if I had financial freedom I wouldn't know what I want to do with my life. I was a freelance developer for 7 years and never had to worry about money. I could work on average about 4 hours a day and spend the rest of my time on my own projects or whatever else struck my fancy. It was fun for a time - 7 years to be exact - but I eventually got lonely. I hadn't developed very many meaningful relationships with people I didn't know for 10 years already and I felt isolated. I would rail on the refresh button on various social media websites in search of some kind of human connection. So I took a full time job and I based the company I chose to work for solely on the people I met there. It's been over 7 months and I've already built friendships with tons of new people and I feel more connected to the world than I have in years. I get to work on fairly interesting stuff without the stress of having to keep my pipeline filled and when I go home I don't take my work with me, which was a big problem I had when freelancing; keeping my work and personal lives separate. That's why this article resonates with me, anyways. I made more money as a freelancer but past a certain point I didn't know what to spend it on and having the money didn't really make me happy. What makes me happy is building relationships with people and sharing in their struggles and triumphs. I really don't think I'll mind doing this for another couple decades.

noisy_boy 12y ago
The reason you were not feeling connected wasn't that you were freelancing. It was because you presumably didn't do anything else that gave you the opportunity of connecting with people. If you were freelancing and met like minded people in your free time doing things you like, you would have felt as much connected, if not more, as you feel now in your full time job. And would probably have had more free time. The full time job simply put you in a situation where you got to interact with people without making any effort (except going to office which you would be doing anyway for any full time job). Freelancing wasn't the reason for your earlier dissatisfaction and a full time job isn't the solution for anybody who is dissatisfied due to lack of human interaction.
- marknutter 12y ago
  > The reason you were not feeling connected wasn't that you were freelancing. It was because you presumably didn't do anything else that gave you the opportunity of connecting with people. If you were freelancing and met like minded people in your free time doing things you like, you would have felt as much connected, if not more, as you feel now in your full time job. And would probably have had more free time. But that's where you're wrong. I went to meetups regularly, participated in events like Rails Rumble, worked at co-location spaces, etc. I got plenty of human interaction but it simply wasn't the same as what I get now at my full time job. I liken it to home schooled kids. Sure, they can setup play dates and events with other home schooled kids or participate in out-of-school programs with public school kids, but they will never truly get the same level of social interaction public/private school kids get because they aren't going through exactly the same trials in exactly the same way. Don't get me wrong, I loved the freedom I had when I was a freelancer and I will likely go back to that lifestyle some day but I would be lying if I didn't admit that there was a certain sense of disconnectedness I felt after all those years being on my own. I'm happy as a full time employee now and that's all that matters.
  - noisy_boy 12y ago
    Interesting - I guess the amount of time spent and the degree of common goals, amount of common successes/failures do have a bearing on the strength of sense of belonging to a group. Maybe the experience you were getting in the meetups etc, wasn't scoring high on those points. E.g. you may be only spending 2 hours on the weekly football you play with your friends, but the sheer intensity of the shared experience in such a short time might give you more satisfaction than other activities you may be doing more frequently.

noisy_boy 12y ago

The reason you were not feeling connected wasn't that you were freelancing. It was because you presumably didn't do anything else that gave you the opportunity of connecting with people. If you were freelancing and met like minded people in your free time doing things you like, you would have felt as much connected, if not more, as you feel now in your full time job. And would probably have had more free time. The full time job simply put you in a situation where you got to interact with people without making any effort (except going to office which you would be doing anyway for any full time job). Freelancing wasn't the reason for your earlier dissatisfaction and a full time job isn't the solution for anybody who is dissatisfied due to lack of human interaction.

marknutter 12y ago
> The reason you were not feeling connected wasn't that you were freelancing. It was because you presumably didn't do anything else that gave you the opportunity of connecting with people. If you were freelancing and met like minded people in your free time doing things you like, you would have felt as much connected, if not more, as you feel now in your full time job. And would probably have had more free time. But that's where you're wrong. I went to meetups regularly, participated in events like Rails Rumble, worked at co-location spaces, etc. I got plenty of human interaction but it simply wasn't the same as what I get now at my full time job. I liken it to home schooled kids. Sure, they can setup play dates and events with other home schooled kids or participate in out-of-school programs with public school kids, but they will never truly get the same level of social interaction public/private school kids get because they aren't going through exactly the same trials in exactly the same way. Don't get me wrong, I loved the freedom I had when I was a freelancer and I will likely go back to that lifestyle some day but I would be lying if I didn't admit that there was a certain sense of disconnectedness I felt after all those years being on my own. I'm happy as a full time employee now and that's all that matters.
- noisy_boy 12y ago
  Interesting - I guess the amount of time spent and the degree of common goals, amount of common successes/failures do have a bearing on the strength of sense of belonging to a group. Maybe the experience you were getting in the meetups etc, wasn't scoring high on those points. E.g. you may be only spending 2 hours on the weekly football you play with your friends, but the sheer intensity of the shared experience in such a short time might give you more satisfaction than other activities you may be doing more frequently.