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I agree with your last sentence. Unfortunately, I don't think it's that much better to tell them "It's okay, it will be better when you grow up." While it's tru

I agree with your last sentence. Unfortunately, I don't think it's that much better to tell them "It's okay, it will be better when you grow up." While it's true that they won't experience customary physical violence or frequent overt verbal abuse in an adult workplace, they most likely will run into bullies. Those bullies will have the same motivations as school bullies and the solution should be much the same: find a way to either fight them or avoid them.

cyorir 12y ago
I couldn't agree more. If a child is bullied for a specific reason (not conforming to society's perceptions or expectations) then there is no guarantee that that reason will go away unless society changes (which tends to happen slowly, if at all). Unfortunately, you may find situations were it is hard to either fight or avoid, and you need a more subtle solution. This has happened to me in college and in my internship.
mikeash 12y ago
The main difference, I think, is that it's way easier to avoid bullies as an adult. If there's a bully among your friends, find new friends. If there's a workplace bully, find a new job, or better yet take it up with HR and make him find a new job. If there's a bully who works at a store, don't go to that store. Even in a really bad case, like the bully is on the local police force, you can move to a new city. There's no adult situation comparable to being forced to spend every weekday in the same building as hundreds of people whose company you don't choose. Except joining the military, I suppose, but that just reinforces how different it is from regular adult life.
- vacri 12y ago
  There are plenty of people without in-demand skills who are locked-in to their shitty jobs because they need the money.
  - mikeash 12y ago
    That's true, and adults can get trapped. But it's not the norm, and even then, there's always the option of quitting your job and going out to live in the woods or something. It's not necessarily a good option, but even having a potential out that's a bad option can make a big difference, mentally.

cyorir 12y ago

I couldn't agree more. If a child is bullied for a specific reason (not conforming to society's perceptions or expectations) then there is no guarantee that that reason will go away unless society changes (which tends to happen slowly, if at all). Unfortunately, you may find situations were it is hard to either fight or avoid, and you need a more subtle solution. This has happened to me in college and in my internship.

mikeash 12y ago

The main difference, I think, is that it's way easier to avoid bullies as an adult. If there's a bully among your friends, find new friends. If there's a workplace bully, find a new job, or better yet take it up with HR and make him find a new job. If there's a bully who works at a store, don't go to that store. Even in a really bad case, like the bully is on the local police force, you can move to a new city. There's no adult situation comparable to being forced to spend every weekday in the same building as hundreds of people whose company you don't choose. Except joining the military, I suppose, but that just reinforces how different it is from regular adult life.

vacri 12y ago
There are plenty of people without in-demand skills who are locked-in to their shitty jobs because they need the money.
- mikeash 12y ago
  That's true, and adults can get trapped. But it's not the norm, and even then, there's always the option of quitting your job and going out to live in the woods or something. It's not necessarily a good option, but even having a potential out that's a bad option can make a big difference, mentally.