4 ms·

You can tell from the beginning of those texts that she was planning this all along, or at the very least - preparing for it. She uses legal language throughout

by arfliw 12y ago

You can tell from the beginning of those texts that she was planning this all along, or at the very least - preparing for it. She uses legal language throughout and says little else: 'stop threatening me' 'this is harassment' 'you are effecting my working environment' etc etc.

jsmeaton 12y ago
All the things she said sound like they are true though. After only reading the texts she did exactly the right thing. She told the guy what he was doing was wrong. She let him know that it was really bad for her work. He kept going! How is that bait? She gave him all the information he needed to stop and he didn't. Throwing in a few of those 'legal' words should have pulled him right up, but he just threatened her. He's an idiot.
jacquesgt 12y ago
Slimy is telling a woman she can't be called a cofounder because "she's a girl". Slimy is threatening to fire a subordinate if they won't date you. Slimy is ignoring complaints from an employee about sexual harassment. Slimy is firing someone for trying to exercise their rights to not be harassed. Using clear language to communicate boundaries isn't slimy at all. It's reprehensible that she (allegedly for the pedants in the crowd) even had to say those things. Building a case when no one does anything about a pattern of continued discrimination and harassment it's slimy at all; it's exercising your basic human and legal rights. What was the alternative? Not documenting the abuse so that it could get dismissed as a he said/she said argument? Deciding between putting up with the abuse or throwing away all the hard work she put into the company? Apparently her options were to be slimy by documenting her case, or to get dismissed as a bitter woman who was blowing things out of proportion because she got dumped. Nice.
- deleted 12y ago
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- arfliw 12y ago
  Apologies, I edited my answer (in response to heavy downvotes) before I saw your reply. Calling her actions slimy was probably out of line.
amirmc 12y ago
Right. Because when someone replies to one of your texts with "Stop harassing me" for whatever reason, you simply continue as you are. Here's a tip for everyone. If one party in the conversation begins using words like 'harassment' with respect to your behaviour, then back the fuck off (whether you believe you're in the clear or not). You are a complete moron if you continue to engage the same way.
ossreality 12y ago
You're a worthless piece of shit.
memorex55 12y ago
I used to know this girl (Whitney). I knew her for many years, and I have to say that she was probably baiting them at the very least. The guy is clearly slimy and should lose his job, and of course, people change... but over a year ago, another friend and I predicted that something very similar to this would happen. She has played this role in the past.
- deleted 12y ago
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- ninavizz 12y ago
  She's a WOMAN, not a girl. Sorry—no intent in being PC, but as a female in the biz, it's just profoundly abrasive to read "girl" all over the place. In a social context, a woman cam be a "girl." In business, she's a woman. Always. Period. This is a business matter, where personal stuff got inappropriately smeared-in to the business, which is the premise of the lawsuit. Guys: We don't call you boys at work. Woman, please please please.
  - rlu 12y ago
    This is obviously kind of delicate, but as someone who has referred to young-ish women as girls before, I'll at least attempt to explain my confusion. Men are often called "guys" - and the connotation to me is just a more informal way of saying "men". What is the female equivalent of "guy"? Is it chick? Chick certainly doesn't seem right and (to me) kind of has different meaning associated with it as compared to any extra meaning "guy" has when compared to "man". "Woman" usually seems very formal to me in the same way that "Man" does. So...what do I use instead? Sometimes I do use girl in its place because it seems less formal but (I thought) not offensive. If someone says "do you know who John Doe is" in a work context, I will probably say something like "oh he's a guy working on XYZ" If someone asks "do you know who Jane Doe is" in a work context, I will sometimes say "oh she's a girl working on XYZ". I admit there is some extra thought process in choosing the pronoun: ---1. Who am I speaking to? ---2. How old is the person they are referring to? IDK. Kind of just a brain dump, but just wanted to explain where I come from. But I'll internalize the fact that this may actually be irritating to the women I'm referring to. And that was never my intent. Edit: I just realized that even in your comment you used "Guys" and not "Men". Basically case in point as to the 'conflict'. Why didn't you type Men? it just feels kinda formal, right? But maybe I should just bite the bullet and go the formal route if my attempt to be less formal just ends up being offensive...

by arfliw 12y ago

jsmeaton 12y ago

All the things she said sound like they are true though. After only reading the texts she did exactly the right thing. She told the guy what he was doing was wrong. She let him know that it was really bad for her work. He kept going! How is that bait? She gave him all the information he needed to stop and he didn't. Throwing in a few of those 'legal' words should have pulled him right up, but he just threatened her. He's an idiot.

jacquesgt 12y ago

Slimy is telling a woman she can't be called a cofounder because "she's a girl". Slimy is threatening to fire a subordinate if they won't date you. Slimy is ignoring complaints from an employee about sexual harassment. Slimy is firing someone for trying to exercise their rights to not be harassed. Using clear language to communicate boundaries isn't slimy at all. It's reprehensible that she (allegedly for the pedants in the crowd) even had to say those things. Building a case when no one does anything about a pattern of continued discrimination and harassment it's slimy at all; it's exercising your basic human and legal rights. What was the alternative? Not documenting the abuse so that it could get dismissed as a he said/she said argument? Deciding between putting up with the abuse or throwing away all the hard work she put into the company? Apparently her options were to be slimy by documenting her case, or to get dismissed as a bitter woman who was blowing things out of proportion because she got dumped. Nice.

deleted 12y ago
[deleted]
arfliw 12y ago
Apologies, I edited my answer (in response to heavy downvotes) before I saw your reply. Calling her actions slimy was probably out of line.

amirmc 12y ago

Right. Because when someone replies to one of your texts with "Stop harassing me" for whatever reason, you simply continue as you are. Here's a tip for everyone. If one party in the conversation begins using words like 'harassment' with respect to your behaviour, then back the fuck off (whether you believe you're in the clear or not). You are a complete moron if you continue to engage the same way.

ossreality 12y ago

You're a worthless piece of shit.

memorex55 12y ago

I used to know this girl (Whitney). I knew her for many years, and I have to say that she was probably baiting them at the very least. The guy is clearly slimy and should lose his job, and of course, people change... but over a year ago, another friend and I predicted that something very similar to this would happen. She has played this role in the past.

deleted 12y ago
[deleted]
ninavizz 12y ago
She's a WOMAN, not a girl. Sorry—no intent in being PC, but as a female in the biz, it's just profoundly abrasive to read "girl" all over the place. In a social context, a woman cam be a "girl." In business, she's a woman. Always. Period. This is a business matter, where personal stuff got inappropriately smeared-in to the business, which is the premise of the lawsuit. Guys: We don't call you boys at work. Woman, please please please.
- rlu 12y ago
  This is obviously kind of delicate, but as someone who has referred to young-ish women as girls before, I'll at least attempt to explain my confusion. Men are often called "guys" - and the connotation to me is just a more informal way of saying "men". What is the female equivalent of "guy"? Is it chick? Chick certainly doesn't seem right and (to me) kind of has different meaning associated with it as compared to any extra meaning "guy" has when compared to "man". "Woman" usually seems very formal to me in the same way that "Man" does. So...what do I use instead? Sometimes I do use girl in its place because it seems less formal but (I thought) not offensive. If someone says "do you know who John Doe is" in a work context, I will probably say something like "oh he's a guy working on XYZ" If someone asks "do you know who Jane Doe is" in a work context, I will sometimes say "oh she's a girl working on XYZ". I admit there is some extra thought process in choosing the pronoun: ---1. Who am I speaking to? ---2. How old is the person they are referring to? IDK. Kind of just a brain dump, but just wanted to explain where I come from. But I'll internalize the fact that this may actually be irritating to the women I'm referring to. And that was never my intent. Edit: I just realized that even in your comment you used "Guys" and not "Men". Basically case in point as to the 'conflict'. Why didn't you type Men? it just feels kinda formal, right? But maybe I should just bite the bullet and go the formal route if my attempt to be less formal just ends up being offensive...