OP if you can read this please consider following: - Do not do it. You are seeking a permanent solution to a temporary problem. It is illogical. - Find some r

OP if you can read this please consider following: - Do not do it. You are seeking a permanent solution to a temporary problem. It is illogical. - Find some relief in marijuana. It will definitely take the edge off. Suicidal thoughts will be gone in the first few tokes. - Leave the job or take a vacation, and then leave it. The job is not helping you at all, and it looks like the founder is a narcisstic insensitive person. It also sounds like they are not very good colleagues at all. Stay away from those energy black holes. - What's done is done. It's time for you to leave the past. What's more, there's a whole array of other places in the world you can work. I can name a few: Vancouver, BC: Pro: Clean environment. Great medical marijuana. Cons: People are pretentious, high living costs. California: Pro: Thriving startup scene. Great medical marijuana. Cons: I don't know because I never been there. Thugs? idk. Thailand: Pro: Cheap living cost.Not sure about smoking weed there. Cons: Might be dangerous for foreigners. I never been there, so I don't know. South Korea: Pro: Moderately cheap. Safe. You might end up teaching english. Cons: People's hospitality varies region to region. I have never worked there. Best of luck mate, and remember, there are many many other options out there.