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You can rebirth yourself in this life at any time. Run (towards or away). When you can't run, fight. When you are beaten in the fight, become reborn. For every

by pistle 12y ago

You can rebirth yourself in this life at any time. Run (towards or away). When you can't run, fight. When you are beaten in the fight, become reborn. For every group of 1, 100, 1 million people who you think see you as a failure, there are billions of others who will only know you as a whoever you are the first time they see you. Internally, reconsider any rigid concept of self. Who are you? What do you value? Why do you value that? You can spend each sublife toiling away to only see it destroyed by external or internal flaws in the design or tooling. You have to let go of your 'self' to find yourself and that can mean trials and tribulations, but struggle and suffering is the human condition. Happiness comes in various sizes by playing the game with the human condition and having it go better than bad. Small victories await. You must PLAY to win and play to WIN.

TheSpiceIsLife 12y ago
Good advice, in my opinion. On implementation: Run: Sell / give away / otherwise dispose of everything that anchors you to memories of the past. Archive or delete photos. Move house. Fight: Physically: If you can drag yourself to it, find someone who teaches MMA and doesn't pull their punches, and doesn't expect you to either (edit: I mean, in a control situation where the training is hard, not like fight club or something). It feels damn good to be beaten up, and to be able to hit someone as hard as you can. Mentally / emotionally: don't kill yourself. Fight it. Reborn: Just survive the next 6 - 12 months and you will be. I don't think there's anything you can do to make this happen over night. I've worked with some good counsellors and psychologists that have helped along the way. The good ones always say shocking things, for example one psychologist said to me "Look, I don't think being emotive is really that effective for you. Probably what you need to do is drink some cement - that is, harden the fuck up. Or, if you think it will help, drink your own urine. But anyway, clearly sitting around crying about your situation isn't working for you", which, in the context of what was happening, was exactly what I needed to hear. Hearing someone else say "oh, poor you, that must be hard" would have only made things worse. One of the best things a friend said to me was "Go on, kill yourself, you'll at least have achieved more than me." Ha! My AU$0.02

by pistle 12y ago

TheSpiceIsLife 12y ago

Good advice, in my opinion. On implementation: Run: Sell / give away / otherwise dispose of everything that anchors you to memories of the past. Archive or delete photos. Move house. Fight: Physically: If you can drag yourself to it, find someone who teaches MMA and doesn't pull their punches, and doesn't expect you to either (edit: I mean, in a control situation where the training is hard, not like fight club or something). It feels damn good to be beaten up, and to be able to hit someone as hard as you can. Mentally / emotionally: don't kill yourself. Fight it. Reborn: Just survive the next 6 - 12 months and you will be. I don't think there's anything you can do to make this happen over night. I've worked with some good counsellors and psychologists that have helped along the way. The good ones always say shocking things, for example one psychologist said to me "Look, I don't think being emotive is really that effective for you. Probably what you need to do is drink some cement - that is, harden the fuck up. Or, if you think it will help, drink your own urine. But anyway, clearly sitting around crying about your situation isn't working for you", which, in the context of what was happening, was exactly what I needed to hear. Hearing someone else say "oh, poor you, that must be hard" would have only made things worse. One of the best things a friend said to me was "Go on, kill yourself, you'll at least have achieved more than me." Ha! My AU$0.02