First, thanks for sharing. It helps me feel a little relaxed in knowing that it is not just a problem for me. And hope it works the other way around too. =) I

First, thanks for sharing. It helps me feel a little relaxed in knowing that it is not just a problem for me. And hope it works the other way around too. =) I think there are a few factors. Being introvert is just one. Being an immigrant is an important factor too (I assume since you mentioned you are not native English speaker). It is not easy being an immigrant (in a new environment and new society, sometimes all by yourself), and combining being introvert it is definitely harder. I suggest the best way is to start small. Start with things you can do. For example, maybe get a car? If you are an engineer I suppose financial wise this is not a big problem? In the US being able to drive around and move around on your own is very important, since public transportation is very limited. This will give you a sense of being in charge, being more able to initiate actions, instead of waiting for people to pick you up because you don't have a car. AS far as friends go, it would be easier to start with people with similar backgrounds instead of local people, especially for an introvert. (But if you have opportunity to talk to local people, by all means do it as well.) Do you know other people in your company that is around your age and is also immigrant / Asian? Another way to reach out is to find people with similar interests. A sports club (soccer, tennis, whatever) if that is your thing, or a reading group? Another thing for me, (not sure if it is for you) is that I have to tell myself to "open up" a little bit, not afraid of making mistakes or being awkward. This is kind of chicken-and-egg. You need confidence to feel free to try and not care about mistakes. You also need to not make many mistakes to have confidence. But as a non-native, sure there are a lot of mistakes to make, English or other wise. I guess I can only start "faking" it first (wink). Or maybe a change in attitude: instead of feeling dead-fish when making a mistake, try to think of it as something funny. (Language mistakes actually can make a good funny story when talking to friends.) When one can laugh at himself, other people feel at ease too. Hope you will get better through time.