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A few observations: 1) I'm fairly introverted, and I've been successful finding new friends when I've found interest-based clubs/groups; for me this would be g

A few observations: 1) I'm fairly introverted, and I've been successful finding new friends when I've found interest-based clubs/groups; for me this would be gaming or making-things groups; it could also be a local sports league, tech meetup, or book club or something. These are great ways to meet people. With a little bit of luck you'll meet cool people with similar interests in no time. 2) You seem far too nervous about your accent. I have worked and developed friendships with a few people with really strong accents, and have always found that people are willing to work through it as long as you are. I really doubt people mind yours; you just have to laugh off miscommunications and keep smiling. 3) Most people are really friendly most of the time if you engage them in a positive way and are simply pleasant to be around. I strongly suggest that when you meet some people you like at one of the aforementioned interest-based clubs, you simply be honest with them and tell them straight up that you're trying to make more friends in the area. You aren't going to get laughed at; most people have been there and will be totally sympathetic and will invite you along to something. In the case that someone seems mean, they're probably an asshole anyway. Just make sure you smile and are pleasant to be around and people will be friendly back to you. Overall, it sounds to me like you're stuck in a sort of negative-self-image-feedback-loop. Stay positive and smile a lot and I promise people will like you.

VLM 12y ago
As another introverted guy find an introvert compatible sport. Sport doesn't just mean competitive league team ball games. I like hiking. Its dangerous to hike alone. There are innumerable hiking clubs where you can meet people, or if you're not in the mood to talk they'll at least make sure if you break your leg you won't be left to die, plus you'll get some excellent exercise. Asian is waaaaaay too vague but I did take a semester of Japanese for the heck of it perhaps a decade ago, and the OP did ask to meet ladies, and the class was about 50% women who would fight over the opportunity to "study" with a native speaker. So lets go to the coffee shop after class and discuss the homework further, etc. So find the local higher ed school and ask the teacher if they'd like the help of a native speaker, even if all you do during class is sip a soda I'm sure you'll get all the attention you can tolerate both before and after class. Stay on the teachers good side by never interrupting or correcting them unless prompted (their class, not yours). Aside from language, an ethnic cooking class might like your help. OP may think being foreigner means Americans won't care, but I found it totally fascinating talking to a Korean coworker for endless hours. You need a collection of conversation starters "well, in Korea we have vending machines that contain beer" or "ah well a twelve hour flight back home next summer" or "let me tell you about real korean bbq" or whatever.
kaitai 12y ago
I'll suggest ultimate frisbee as another sport that is welcoming to nerds. Find the mellow pick-up game that has a few summer parties.

VLM 12y ago

As another introverted guy find an introvert compatible sport. Sport doesn't just mean competitive league team ball games. I like hiking. Its dangerous to hike alone. There are innumerable hiking clubs where you can meet people, or if you're not in the mood to talk they'll at least make sure if you break your leg you won't be left to die, plus you'll get some excellent exercise. Asian is waaaaaay too vague but I did take a semester of Japanese for the heck of it perhaps a decade ago, and the OP did ask to meet ladies, and the class was about 50% women who would fight over the opportunity to "study" with a native speaker. So lets go to the coffee shop after class and discuss the homework further, etc. So find the local higher ed school and ask the teacher if they'd like the help of a native speaker, even if all you do during class is sip a soda I'm sure you'll get all the attention you can tolerate both before and after class. Stay on the teachers good side by never interrupting or correcting them unless prompted (their class, not yours). Aside from language, an ethnic cooking class might like your help. OP may think being foreigner means Americans won't care, but I found it totally fascinating talking to a Korean coworker for endless hours. You need a collection of conversation starters "well, in Korea we have vending machines that contain beer" or "ah well a twelve hour flight back home next summer" or "let me tell you about real korean bbq" or whatever.

kaitai 12y ago

I'll suggest ultimate frisbee as another sport that is welcoming to nerds. Find the mellow pick-up game that has a few summer parties.