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very ironic, I am located in China. The Great Firewall obstructs all traffic to google properties. Hence, this message is basically inaccessible (even my VPN do

very ironic, I am located in China. The Great Firewall obstructs all traffic to google properties. Hence, this message is basically inaccessible (even my VPN does not help).

sabalaba 12y ago
Full Text: (I had to use Google Docs because my text exceeded 2000 characters. I apologize.) I know the question sounds really awkward, but it's just exactly what I think. I am a software engineer intern at a mid-sized company in redwood city, and my internship ends on August. I love my work, and I consider myself a reasonably intelligent, tidy, and nice guy. However, it saddens me when I find myself idling alone on weekends, doing everything by myself. Since I started my internship on February, on weekends, I have always had meals, watched movies, gone shopping, taken a walk, and done every activity by myself. I do not even have roommates. This is fine most of the time, but it's really painful on times when I have a lack of self-confidence. I think it may even become dangerous later. Whenever I see groups of people in the street hanging out with each other, a sense of envy grows in my mind. I wonder where they met each other, and how come they became so intimate to each other. As a man at age 26, I want to meet some nice ladies too. My major problems, as I think, are: 1. After 3.5 years of college life in which I had absolutely no social life, my introversion seriously exacerbated. I have an especially hard time getting close to strangers. 2. I thought my English was decent, but I found out that is only true when compared to other asian students' in colleges FOB, and these days I am more and more realizing that my English is not good enough to become close friends with English speaking people. Every day I meet people in my work, and I manage to express what I want to say, but often it's in a very awkward way, and even worse, when I am among many people talking, I can never take part in their conversation. (believe me, I literally suck without enough time and a dictionary) 3. I do not have a car, and for many people in the bay area it's okay, but for me it's a great hindrance to being social. Think about it, what girl would consider seeing an awkward guy even without a car! What can I do? I imagined myself striking up a conversation with people sitting near at a cafe, standing at a queue, etc., but since I know I will not be able to talk like a normal American guy (not even close, when it comes to a small chat), I recoil. I started fearing coming of weekends. To me it's just two and a half utterly lonely days that could have been spent in a more constructive way but repeatedly ends up being wasted and growing the self-hatred towards me.
lucb1e 12y ago
Interesting VPN that is then. How about Tor?

very ironic, I am located in China. The Great Firewall obstructs all traffic to google properties. Hence, this message is basically inaccessible (even my VPN does not help).

sabalaba 12y ago

Full Text: (I had to use Google Docs because my text exceeded 2000 characters. I apologize.) I know the question sounds really awkward, but it's just exactly what I think. I am a software engineer intern at a mid-sized company in redwood city, and my internship ends on August. I love my work, and I consider myself a reasonably intelligent, tidy, and nice guy. However, it saddens me when I find myself idling alone on weekends, doing everything by myself. Since I started my internship on February, on weekends, I have always had meals, watched movies, gone shopping, taken a walk, and done every activity by myself. I do not even have roommates. This is fine most of the time, but it's really painful on times when I have a lack of self-confidence. I think it may even become dangerous later. Whenever I see groups of people in the street hanging out with each other, a sense of envy grows in my mind. I wonder where they met each other, and how come they became so intimate to each other. As a man at age 26, I want to meet some nice ladies too. My major problems, as I think, are: 1. After 3.5 years of college life in which I had absolutely no social life, my introversion seriously exacerbated. I have an especially hard time getting close to strangers. 2. I thought my English was decent, but I found out that is only true when compared to other asian students' in colleges FOB, and these days I am more and more realizing that my English is not good enough to become close friends with English speaking people. Every day I meet people in my work, and I manage to express what I want to say, but often it's in a very awkward way, and even worse, when I am among many people talking, I can never take part in their conversation. (believe me, I literally suck without enough time and a dictionary) 3. I do not have a car, and for many people in the bay area it's okay, but for me it's a great hindrance to being social. Think about it, what girl would consider seeing an awkward guy even without a car! What can I do? I imagined myself striking up a conversation with people sitting near at a cafe, standing at a queue, etc., but since I know I will not be able to talk like a normal American guy (not even close, when it comes to a small chat), I recoil. I started fearing coming of weekends. To me it's just two and a half utterly lonely days that could have been spent in a more constructive way but repeatedly ends up being wasted and growing the self-hatred towards me.

lucb1e 12y ago

Interesting VPN that is then. How about Tor?