4 ms·

> I am a 34-year old male virgin. There's nothing bad about this. So far so good. That's perfectly fine; I'm cool with that -- and a lot of HN readership proba

> I am a 34-year old male virgin. There's nothing bad about this. So far so good. That's perfectly fine; I'm cool with that -- and a lot of HN readership probably is too. I doubt there's a ton of intolerant people here who go, "WHAT? A 34 year old male virgin? No way, get out!" > You guys make way too big a deal about it. I always here people talk about sex like they'll die without it, but it's just not that important. I don't see the point in telling people this. Maybe they are different, have different levels of hormones than you do, and have different emotions. As long as they aren't forcing you to have sex, I don't see that you should be telling them it's no big deal. Maybe it is a big deal to them. I don't see much difference between saying this and telling a gay person, "Gah, attraction to other men is just not that important. Just don't think of guys, and you should get over it."

34yearold 12y ago
What gets me is that I've heard of sex described inaccurately as a "need" on a great many occasions. You die without needs. I'm living proof that you don't die without sex. You might be right about the hormones, but I honestly think that people care more about what others think on this subject.
xor-ed-wolf 12y ago
You are forgetting or don't see that society at large does exactly the thing. Every time coworkers/peers/acquaintances learn that someone is a virgin at mid-life he or she goes through proactive bashing to stop that and have a partner or become a parent. I saw this on too many occasions for it to be random and irrelevant rant. People are actually pressured into having sex.
mcv 12y ago
> I doubt there's a ton of intolerant people here who go, "WHAT? A 34 year old male virgin? No way, get out!" Maybe not here, but it in society in general, that is unfortunately an extremely common attitude. You're supposed to have as much sex as you can, and if you don't, there's something wrong with you. It's a stupid and harmful attitude, but it doesn't seem to be going away. I mean, sex is nice, but there are plenty of things better than sex. The context of the sex matters a lot too, yet society tells us that any sex is better than no sex.

34yearold 12y ago

What gets me is that I've heard of sex described inaccurately as a "need" on a great many occasions. You die without needs. I'm living proof that you don't die without sex. You might be right about the hormones, but I honestly think that people care more about what others think on this subject.

xor-ed-wolf 12y ago

You are forgetting or don't see that society at large does exactly the thing. Every time coworkers/peers/acquaintances learn that someone is a virgin at mid-life he or she goes through proactive bashing to stop that and have a partner or become a parent. I saw this on too many occasions for it to be random and irrelevant rant. People are actually pressured into having sex.

mcv 12y ago

> I doubt there's a ton of intolerant people here who go, "WHAT? A 34 year old male virgin? No way, get out!" Maybe not here, but it in society in general, that is unfortunately an extremely common attitude. You're supposed to have as much sex as you can, and if you don't, there's something wrong with you. It's a stupid and harmful attitude, but it doesn't seem to be going away. I mean, sex is nice, but there are plenty of things better than sex. The context of the sex matters a lot too, yet society tells us that any sex is better than no sex.