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That's advice that is useful in some circumstances and very dangerous in others. People DO underestimate their own abilities, and it can be very damaging to th

That's advice that is useful in some circumstances and very dangerous in others. People DO underestimate their own abilities, and it can be very damaging to their careers and lives. For example, I have a friend who genuinely has world-class skills in a couple of areas, but spends most of his self-talk time telling himself that he's not as good as anyone else at those things. That's done significant harm to his health, livelihood and happiness. Telling him, as you seem to be, to just accept all those false beliefs about his inadequacy isn't going to help even a little bit. Having said that: you do make a very valuable point. If the other people really are better than you, then it's far more valuable to acknowledge that. But it's very important to be sure you're right in your estimation of your own skill before coming to that conclusion. Whilst it make be the case for you personally that you never underrate your own skills, that's far from universal.

vijucat 12y ago
I have to agree with you. I remember being depressed when I was younger and it really did cloud my judgement; I could not assess situations objectively and was beating myself up unnecessarily. OP, please tread with caution regarding my advice.
- septerr 12y ago
  Thanks both to you and thenomad for your replies. vijucat, your answer reminds me of Eckhart Tolle[1]. I have a tendency towards depression. And among other things I have listened to Eckhart in past to deal with it. And he helped me greatly. I feel like you are right. Intuitively I feel I need to simply acknowledge that these folks are better than me at this thing and I should admire their skill without envy. I feel like it will be a great weight off of me when I am able to do that. And I understand what you mean by you don't know what would follow after that. I have found that in situations where I have stopped fighting 'what is', things have turned out such that the cause of my struggle was removed. 'What is' became 'what I wanted'. Maybe this is what will happen again. I do feel I have the ability to master this frontend development but comparison with others has become a debilitating factor. In any case, I have decided to make my goal #1 to become able to acknowledge others' achievements and skill without pangs of envy. [1] http://www.amazon.com/Eckhart-Tolle/e/B001H6GZ5K http://www.amazon.com/Eckhart-Tolle/e/B001H6GZ5K EDIT: added link to Eckhart Tolle.

vijucat 12y ago

I have to agree with you. I remember being depressed when I was younger and it really did cloud my judgement; I could not assess situations objectively and was beating myself up unnecessarily. OP, please tread with caution regarding my advice.

septerr 12y ago
Thanks both to you and thenomad for your replies. vijucat, your answer reminds me of Eckhart Tolle[1]. I have a tendency towards depression. And among other things I have listened to Eckhart in past to deal with it. And he helped me greatly. I feel like you are right. Intuitively I feel I need to simply acknowledge that these folks are better than me at this thing and I should admire their skill without envy. I feel like it will be a great weight off of me when I am able to do that. And I understand what you mean by you don't know what would follow after that. I have found that in situations where I have stopped fighting 'what is', things have turned out such that the cause of my struggle was removed. 'What is' became 'what I wanted'. Maybe this is what will happen again. I do feel I have the ability to master this frontend development but comparison with others has become a debilitating factor. In any case, I have decided to make my goal #1 to become able to acknowledge others' achievements and skill without pangs of envy. [1] http://www.amazon.com/Eckhart-Tolle/e/B001H6GZ5K http://www.amazon.com/Eckhart-Tolle/e/B001H6GZ5K EDIT: added link to Eckhart Tolle.