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"It is often argued that life-threatening illness imbues its victims with a new vigor for life. I’ve always found this notion sort of idiotic..." In recent yea

by tapp 12y ago

"It is often argued that life-threatening illness imbues its victims with a new vigor for life. I’ve always found this notion sort of idiotic..." In recent years, I've spent a lot of time working with late stage cancer patients as part of my job. When I first started, several friends speculated that it might give me a deeper appreciation for my own health, and "imbue me with a new vigor for life" Perversely, similar to the author, I've found the opposite to be true - it can be difficult for me to shake the knowledge that this is a fate that most of us will face (if not directly, on behalf of a loved one) if we're lucky enough not to die of something else first. I don't have any insight to share on what to do about it - I'm still wrestling with the issue. Just wanted to say thank you for posting the story.

digitalengineer 12y ago
I came here to say thank you for posting as well. You are so right: "this is a fate that most of us will face (if not directly, on behalf of a loved one)". If you'd care to read a bit more I highly recommend this controversial book based up on a true story: 'Love Life' http://www.amazon.com/Love-Life-Ray-Kluun/dp/B003IWYKD0 http://www.amazon.com/Love-Life-Ray-Kluun/dp/B003IWYKD0 Edit: A film was made as well, called 'STRICKEN'.
saraid216 12y ago
> When I first started, several friends speculated that it might give me a deeper appreciation for my own health, and "imbue me with a new vigor for life" Yeah, this is basically, "When you think stories actually reflect real life accurately". The deeper appreciation and vigor for life thing does happen. It's just sort of over-represented because it does double duty as a pretty good plot device. There's nothing wrong with you if it doesn't happen to you, just as there's nothing particularly wrong with the hundreds of faceless medical staff busily and competently doing their jobs at the hospital where the ER drama is taking place.
- eli_gottlieb 12y ago
  I dunno. I wonder if the whole "new vigor for life" thing isn't actually just a personality trait coming out. For instance, I think I'll probably respond that way when someone in my family dies. However, I think that because I already know that when Memorial Day and Holocaust Remembrance Day come around each year (and Memorial Day was two days ago, so this is sort of fresh), I don't have any impulse to cry and mourn, but instead to go find Nazis and/or terrorists and/or the Grim Reaper and beat the crap out of them. There might just be some of us who respond to death with an impulse to, well, fight it. EDIT: I'm referring to Israeli Memorial Day, which was in fact two days ago.
  - saraid216 12y ago
    > I wonder if the whole "new vigor for life" thing isn't actually just a personality trait coming out. That would be a pretty sufficient explanation for me. > There might just be some of us who respond to death with an impulse to, well, fight it. There are a good number of such people, yeah.
downer74 12y ago
As human beings, we learn by observing the fates of other human beings. When we encounter a fate that is easily recognized, and assuredly an unenviable fate, there is no ambient curiosity gifted to us by our ignorance. We've seen this movie before, and we know how it ends. The normal psychological response to this sort of thing most certainly is not: wash. rinse. repeat. You can't spend too much time on the frontlines in a pitched battle like cancer, and find yourself filled with a burning desire to experience the struggle first-hand. Jack Kevorkian's form of therapy isn't the greatest idea ever conceived, but for special circumstances, it might sometimes apply. One critical detail of supreme importance, to keep in mind: As a permanent decision, it should never be applied to temporary circumstances. Within the specific context of this anecdote, and the benefit of the author's recall serving us as hindsight, I think, the moment when he noticed the sclera icterus was late in the game, but a conscionable moment for non-theraputic intervention. Arguably, she had already passed her own threshold moment, when she started eating oxies like candy, and wryly deflating strangers attitudes with a malign gallows humor about the fact that her apparent pregnancy was actually a side-effect of terminal liver failure.

by tapp 12y ago

digitalengineer 12y ago

I came here to say thank you for posting as well. You are so right: "this is a fate that most of us will face (if not directly, on behalf of a loved one)". If you'd care to read a bit more I highly recommend this controversial book based up on a true story: 'Love Life' http://www.amazon.com/Love-Life-Ray-Kluun/dp/B003IWYKD0 http://www.amazon.com/Love-Life-Ray-Kluun/dp/B003IWYKD0 Edit: A film was made as well, called 'STRICKEN'.

saraid216 12y ago

> When I first started, several friends speculated that it might give me a deeper appreciation for my own health, and "imbue me with a new vigor for life" Yeah, this is basically, "When you think stories actually reflect real life accurately". The deeper appreciation and vigor for life thing does happen. It's just sort of over-represented because it does double duty as a pretty good plot device. There's nothing wrong with you if it doesn't happen to you, just as there's nothing particularly wrong with the hundreds of faceless medical staff busily and competently doing their jobs at the hospital where the ER drama is taking place.

eli_gottlieb 12y ago
I dunno. I wonder if the whole "new vigor for life" thing isn't actually just a personality trait coming out. For instance, I think I'll probably respond that way when someone in my family dies. However, I think that because I already know that when Memorial Day and Holocaust Remembrance Day come around each year (and Memorial Day was two days ago, so this is sort of fresh), I don't have any impulse to cry and mourn, but instead to go find Nazis and/or terrorists and/or the Grim Reaper and beat the crap out of them. There might just be some of us who respond to death with an impulse to, well, fight it. EDIT: I'm referring to Israeli Memorial Day, which was in fact two days ago.
- saraid216 12y ago
  > I wonder if the whole "new vigor for life" thing isn't actually just a personality trait coming out. That would be a pretty sufficient explanation for me. > There might just be some of us who respond to death with an impulse to, well, fight it. There are a good number of such people, yeah.

downer74 12y ago

As human beings, we learn by observing the fates of other human beings. When we encounter a fate that is easily recognized, and assuredly an unenviable fate, there is no ambient curiosity gifted to us by our ignorance. We've seen this movie before, and we know how it ends. The normal psychological response to this sort of thing most certainly is not: wash. rinse. repeat. You can't spend too much time on the frontlines in a pitched battle like cancer, and find yourself filled with a burning desire to experience the struggle first-hand. Jack Kevorkian's form of therapy isn't the greatest idea ever conceived, but for special circumstances, it might sometimes apply. One critical detail of supreme importance, to keep in mind: As a permanent decision, it should never be applied to temporary circumstances. Within the specific context of this anecdote, and the benefit of the author's recall serving us as hindsight, I think, the moment when he noticed the sclera icterus was late in the game, but a conscionable moment for non-theraputic intervention. Arguably, she had already passed her own threshold moment, when she started eating oxies like candy, and wryly deflating strangers attitudes with a malign gallows humor about the fact that her apparent pregnancy was actually a side-effect of terminal liver failure.