I agree, a specific flag does not necessarily mean a specific language, and it's unnecessarily provocative. However, flags in general are associated with the i

I agree, a specific flag does not necessarily mean a specific language, and it's unnecessarily provocative. However, flags in general are associated with the idea of language. To show that a dropdown means "choose a language" you could put a cluster of neutral, solid-colored flags, a different color for each flag. In the dropdown include the standard country code along with the language name rendered in its own language. As for what language to start with, either: - "your" language, or the predominate language that the site is developed and operated in, or - geo-location, or - what makes sense to you. But don't expect "foreign" speakers to speak the default language just because they happen to be reading your site from a particular country. That said, I think most people these days can find the "choose a language" knob, so just try not be rude and you'll be OK.