I guess what people are saying is that red velvet is so unfashionable they'd rather get a job in a factory working green leather day in, day out, than touch it.

I guess what people are saying is that red velvet is so unfashionable they'd rather get a job in a factory working green leather day in, day out, than touch it. Aside: If programming languages were coloured jackets? C - black leather, with studs. C++ - black leather, with studs, on the inside. Perl - there seem to be fourteen armholes. And seven zips. It's light blue, but in some places the paint is flaking and many other colours show through. Oh, and there is no head hole. Its wearers insist it gets things done just fine and is very flexible. Everyone looks at them weirdly. Java - a hospital gown. The bare minimum to cover you, mostly designed around the convenience of others. You can buy a factory to make them, but the customisations don't seem to make any difference. Python - A comfortable denim jacket of average size. It is straightforward to put on. Most people say it fits them perfectly, although a few people say it chafes. Ruby - every time you move this jacket, it changes slightly. Putting your arms into the sleeves causes new sleeves that would fit better to appear underneath the existing ones. If you tap it, you inexplicable end up with two jackets. Haskell - a large tartan straitjacket. When you try to put it on, you find yourself in a new jacket, and the original jacket is still in the wardrobe. The jackets are connected by an unbreakable thread of modal. When you take it off, you find yourself looking at yourself still wearing the jacket. You are connected to your other self by a thread of modal. Allegedly you can do anything without errors whilst wearing a Haskell jacket; you suspect the wearers are simply crazy. Go - A tweed blazer with leather arm patches. It can be split into multiple gackets, which can be worn by multiple people. When wearing your gacket, you can communicate with anyone in another of your gackets, but only one of you can move at once. C# - part of a family of colourful jackets. The fit well, and are suitable for all formal occasions. However, they are not available outside the USA. Knock-offs are available in the rest of the world, but only in shades of grey. Fortran - a powered exo-skeleton. It is old, slightly rusty, uncomfortable, unfashionable, and the wrong choice for almost all occasions. However, whilst wearing it you can run as fast as Usain Bolt. Javascript - a quite ugly mustard yellow suit jacket. It almost looks like its been cut out of something else, a sofa possibly. If you put your hand in a pocket without declaring your intention to do so first, you find other people's stuff in your pocket, and your stuff gone. They are unreasonably popular due to a historical quirk in the law that requires you to wear one of these jackets when visiting a stranger's house. Lisp - a bolt of woven yak wool, dyed saffron. Clojure - a bolt of woven yak wool, dyed saffron. It also comes with some smaller pieces of wool dyed different colours, and a direct phone line to a hospital. If you read enough tutorials online, you can assemble a comfortable and useful jacket, although you often have to copy the jacket before you can modify it. (many edits as I'm on a roll :-) )