24 ms·

The Guilt of the Video-Game Millionaires

194 points by sizzle 13y ago

sizzle 13y ago
I have a hunch that successful start-up founder that did not come from affluent families would share the same sentiment expressed by the game devs in the article. I'd like to hear some opinions on this issue. Being a first generation born in the U.S. myself, this cognitive dissonance in terms of higher tech-job salaries compared to my parents, resonates with me deeply. This really bothers me now since my parents spent their whole lives providing to get me here. I had a highly parsimonious upbringing, which has helped me spend wisely and save money. I can totally relate to these guys feelings.
- jeremymcanally 13y ago
  I can relate, too. My mom was a single mom, and for much of my childhood, she worked as a lunch lady where she made about $375 a month after taxes and the extortionately priced (IMO) insurance plan we were offered. She's now 60 and still works 12 hour days in a factory and has no retirement to speak of really. I do carry a lot of guilt that I easily make more in a week than she makes in a month, but at the same time, I know that's what she wanted for me when I was a kid. She was incredibly supportive of my hobby of programming and "computer stuff." She was super encouraging when it came to technology and learning more about it. I think she knew it would lead to a better life for me in the end, and for that, I'm incredibly grateful to her. And hey now that I'm doing well, I'm sure to return the favor whenever I'm able to (though she's rather proud so I usually have to slip it in around her birthday or Christmas ;)). So while yeah I still carry a bit of conflict over it, I also see it's what she wanted all along and am sure to show my appreciation as much as humanly possible.
  - bm1362 13y ago
    I'm of a similar background. My brother and I are both software devs, making more than 3x as much out of college than her at 62. We both collectively send enough money that she has retired and stopped working. It's not my decision to make for you of course but you should consider reducing the burden.
  - F_d_anconia 13y ago
    You're mother sounds like mine. That being said, I can almost guarantee that the single thing your mother wants for you is to be happy. I can also almost guarantee that what makes HER happy is knowing she did her part to provide the best possible situation for you to become successful and more importantly happy. What's funny is that us (the offspring) feel guilt over the one thing that both us and our parents had been striving for (our personal success). I am by no means successful by coloquial definition but I remember when my mother and I were living on welfare. I remember when I would help her with her janitorial job (it was embarrassing and I couldn't stand seeing her do it). But tl:dr... She and my father are comfortable now and I'm happily living paycheck to paycheck in the city I love. Come future success or not (I hope for the former) I support my mother's dream of seeing me happy and successful as she supports my dream of building a successful company. So do yourself a favor and called your mother, tell you you love her and you're happy with the life you have and will have. She'll appreciate it. Tl:dr:Call your damn mother and tell her you love her. Be happy with the success that you have that she set you up for the best she could.
  - deleted 13y ago
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- deleted 13y ago
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refurb 13y ago
Interesting and well written article. I think the issue that causes a lot of this emotion around money is the fact that we as a society like to think that the harder you work, the more money you make. It's obviously not a true statement at all. When you come into a lot of money for relatively little effort (the comparison of the kid vs. the mother), you start to feel like you don't deserve it at all. "Why do I get $1M for a few months work when my mom gets $20K/yr for busting her ass?"
- gyardley 13y ago
  You get $1M for a few months work because you work hard to put yourself in a position where you potentially could get $1M for a few months work, and then you get a little bit (okay, perhaps more than a little bit) lucky. It's interesting how different people react differently with respect to wealth. My relatively modest personal success is by no means solely a product of hard work - yes, I put myself in a position where I could get lucky, but I still needed a hell of a lot of luck. I didn't always know what I was doing, and things could've just as easily gone south. That said, I've never felt the slightest bit of guilt over anything related to money. The way I see it, undeservedly, disproportionately good things happen all the time in our society, and they have to happen to somebody. Why shouldn't that somebody be me?
  - anigbrowl 13y ago
    So if something horrible happened to you - arising out of social structures, rather than getting hit by lightning, if you see what I mean - would you accept it with similar equanimity?
    - gyardley 13y ago
      Yes, I see what you mean. I make a distinction between the luck (or the lack of it) coming from societal structures, and the luck (or the lack of it) that comes from random events, chance meetings, the black box that is the AppStore, and so on. I was talking more about the latter, while it sounds like you're talking about the former. If you've been unlucky because of an accident of birth, rather than a random event, I wouldn't expect you to just shrug it off. While I've been more lucky than not, when I have been unlucky (primarily with my health, this last year was a little dodgy in a life-threatening sort of way) then yes, I've been pretty blasé about it.
jeffmo 13y ago
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sudden_wealth_syndrome http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sudden_wealth_syndrome
- gammarator 13y ago
  This article also talks about some of the unexpected emotional complications of extreme (relative) wealth: http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/print/2011/04/secret-fears-of-the-super-rich/308419 http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/print/2011/04/secret-fea...
ken47 13y ago
This speaks to the humility of said developers. There are plenty of people who would happily take the sudden millions without giving much thought to the morality of the situation.
sparkzilla 13y ago
Forbes estimates that the average game earns four thousand dollars? That doesn't seem right. I got 32 downloads ($32) for mine.
- adamnemecek 13y ago
  Angry birds made millions. If you average it out, you might get thousands. But yeah, knowing the average does not really give you all that much insight.
- natejenkins 13y ago
  That's the difference between the mean and the median. The median profit for a game is probably much closer to your number, but the mean is the average of all the games like yours (there are many) plus the rare game that makes $10 million or more.
- xamlhacker 13y ago
  I guess mean and median happen to be very different in this case.
- hershel 13y ago
  The median income for game in the app store was less than $1000 in 2011. I'm sure it has came down since.
- deleted 13y ago
  [deleted]
- spada 13y ago
  i recall reading something a couple years ago that ~800,000 apps on the store have zero downloads. average means very little here.
euske 13y ago
Although I'm not making much money myself, I can very well understand this guy's sentiment. As Eric Raymond pointed out, in a hacker community, good fame is sometimes more valued than money. But even fame can be sometimes too much.
jcampbell1 13y ago
Consider the following statements: A) We live in a meritocracy B) Meritocracies are fair Most people accept that A is false. We all know a fucktard that managed to get rich by being manipulative and destroying value. The problem is that people then fail to realize that B is also false. Meritocracies are not fair. Allocating wealth to the people that provide a large amount of entertainment, seems fair, but it is not fair in a broad sense of the word. Meritocracies reward those with good health, good luck, good parents who are encouraging, and the lucky gamete club who have high intelligence or exceptional physical skills. Meritocracies are like democracy: "the worst form of government except all the others that have been tried." Working hard on a startup doesn't really earn you anything. The best you can hope for is that hard work increases your luck surface area. Keep in mind, that there are people that came from better sperm and eggs who will work just as hard but have a much higher chance of success.
- brc 13y ago
  I read a lot of whining on this thread (and many other, recently as well). 'Fair' pops up a lot. The world is not fair. You can either spend your time griping, or you can spend your time living. I sense a lot of 'daddy' models of wealth swimming in peoples heads. http://paulgraham.com/gap.html http://paulgraham.com/gap.html If you didn't win the birth lottery it's not a death sentence. You can still win. Measure your progress against your own expectations, not against the lottery winners.
  - barrkel 13y ago
    The world is not binary either, and that doesn't mean that we can't adjust society to increase or decrease the amount of fairness. It also doesn't mean that the adjusted amount of fairness in society and its rules (both laws and social norms) can't have positive or negative effects on overall total welfare. Oh, and also: nobody wins. Some just take longer to lose.
  - almosnow 13y ago
    The way I see it. This guy didn't won the birh lottery but his mom worked her ass off so he could have a ticket at it. The fact that he feels guilty of basically having accomplished everything that his mother ever wished for him should be a very dishonirable situation. Ooh the humanity...
ssully 13y ago
Not sure if this happens to many people who are well immersed in the tech industry now, but I have had my future career reduced to just "sitting at a desk all day" by friends going into more "labor" intensive careers. They constantly bring it up as something they would never want to do because it sounds boring. This also leads to some resentment from them when I have had a steady paid internship since my sophomore year of college, while all they have gotten is unpaid internships or nothing at all. I personally have never let this bother me because I know what goes into my work and I know how difficult it can be. Despite that I do believe those stigmas attached to my job from friends could creep in on me if I were in a bad place in my life, or maybe even in an excellent financial situation like many of the devs in this article. It's
jwatte 13y ago
That article has terrible fact checking. Braid being the first indie success? How about "Doom"? Games having questionable moral and artistic value? Would you ask the same thing about a TV show? The article at the same time got out wrong, and said nothing I thought was worth saying.
- eropple 13y ago
  The modern indie "movement" is largely defined as being a reaction to the large, corporatized state of game development around when--wait for it--Braid came out. So using that as a signpost is both valid and sensical. And many games have questionable moral and artistic value. Maybe even most. That makes the ones that reach past that so wonderful.
marincounty 13y ago
They shouldn't feel guilty, but if thy were hired by their friend in the early 2000's, with no programming experience, and the friends father set up the Everything; Don't act like you were the Horatio Alger of the Computer industry. I remember a whole lot of drinking, not much programming, and a large company buying your company out. The company looked at your company and shut it down. My real agrivation is this "friend" don't tell me what a cake walk it was back then(he made it out like they were all geniuses)--yes, when I found out the real scoop, I was a little surprised he didn't ever come clean with me. The problem was I gave this dude a fair amout of money when his family pretty much cut him off, and we were all at the age when we were looking for a little help.(The dude was always broke whenever we did anything.) I'm not bitter, but just surprised. I guess he was trying to impress his girlfriend with all the genius stuff?
notastartup 13y ago
How do you replicate such an overnight success with games? What is the most common trait for such titles? It just sheer luck of the draw?
- CmonDev 13y ago
  A lot of quality and a bit of innovation for indies - craft is not agile. Personal brand helps. Marketing for those with money.
noname123 13y ago
I think it has to do with the cognitive dissonance between society's judgement onto individuals to amass wealth and that individual's sense of personal fulfillment. Suppose you're an immigrant who won the H1B lottery to come to US from Nepal and earn 10-20x the notional amount of income you'd at home, way more than your parents. Would you be happy? Like the immigrant, children of the families whose mom's earned only $20K was launched from their socio-economicsphere to another one, the millionaire and above and one citizen in the elite citizenry of one million. Like the immigrant, the children of suddenly acquired wealth still identify the values of his/her original "homeland," values such as humility and hard work instead of vanities and the weariness of those who have had a luxury to be "anxious" about self-fulfillment. The immigrants will not find a sense of belonging, a sense of even accomplishment in the new land. Strangely, they find themselves bewildered as their families and the mantras of what they've been reciting all their lives all have touted as the "touchstone" of their journey. Now that they've arrived, they feel first elated, then slight flatlined, then keeping up the appearances and confused and then cheated and robbed. We've been telling ourselves that starting that startup, taking that job offer, going that school will enable us to have the X: the money, the respect, the cachet, the X and only after X, we'll be whole and then we'll really do the Y, what we really want to do. Or we lock ourselves in a mental prison, disavowing what society have imposed on us regarding X and paint a black & white picture of us pursuing Y and the man forcing X on our throat. But why do we not consider ourselves whole? That is the question we push to the back of my mind chasing the X's and Y's of the day in an attempt to make up for the feeling of incompleteness (like a snake devouring its tail).
- sizzle 13y ago
  I often go down these paths of reasoning, then end up questioning my existence and realizing how short life truly is. This keeps me from dwelling too much on unavoidable situations in the day-to-day. I have experienced the phenomenon of "launching" into a higher socio-economic sphere, being a first generation born in the US. Once I realized my parents could never relate and that they provided this opportunity for me to surpass their standard of living, the money stopped mattering as much as the time I spent with my parents fleeting existence. I would live with the lifelong regret of chasing more money over helping my parents in their last stages of their lives. That's why I chose to stay somewhat local and take care of them, a nursing home would never even begin to cross my mind. I owe my successes in life to their hard work, and it makes me feel complete to make sure they never have to suffer through that stress of providing again. I often wonder what it's like with friends that get kicked out at 18 and have to fend for themselves. Interesting dichotomy.
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enowbi 13y ago
This story encapsulates the complexities of the human nature. For every individual with guilt about his new-found wealth there at least two on the other extreme who would loose no sleep over it and sometimes even if the wealth is ill-gotten.
drawkbox 13y ago
Games, like comic strips and a good laugh, are crucial to keeping people happy. There is lots of value to what games bring for education and allowing a person to get lost in fun for a few moments. Games that bring joy should enrich a developer that brings it. It is amazing how things have changed though, he wouldn't have gotten rich even 10 years ago as there would have been no outlet. That shows the importance of the new industries and how the money is somewhat actually going to creators, where before they create and come away with nothing.
cdcarter 13y ago
If you've suddenly or not so suddenly come into more money than you need for your day-to-day lifestyle, I am more than willing to help you find a not-for-profit hunger relief, education, or arts organization in your local community. It can be hard to find not-for-profits that have good administrations and align with your values. Working in the industry has helped me identify them, plus I know quite a few areas of the US from having lived there. I'm happy to share any expertise I may have to help you find a public charity in your community worth supporting. Email is in my profile.
eeeficus 13y ago
OK give me the money and I'll deal with the guilt!
thelogos 13y ago
I can't really relate to how these guys feel because I've never been that rich but I can definitely relate to some of that guilt that they're speaking of, watching my own mother wake up every morning to slave away in a factory. Just travel around, go to SE Asia for example and look around. You'll see little 6 years old kids selling chewing gum and bottled water at the bus station. I really can't tell you how I feel seeing this day after day. Little kids should be happy. They should be playing with their friends and going to school. Not selling lottery tickets and chewing gum at a bus stop. When I was young, I went to school with many kids like this. Most of them drop out because their parents couldn't pay for tution and books. While I'm not anywhere close to rich, I might as well be Bill Gates compared to these kids. So I wonder to myself, why should I have all this while they have nothing? The guilt plays itself on many levels. When I feel like I'm slacking off, I think about my mother. I think about all those poor kids. I've been given so much, yet I'm still not good enough to take full advantage of it. I hope that one day if I ever become rich, I won't be so delusional as to think that that a huge part of success isn't just luck. For some reason, the older I get, the more I keep dwelling on the fact that life is incredibly shitty and unfair to 99% of the people out there. Strange, whereas many people I know instead look at their richer peers and wonder, why shouldn't I have more?
- sizzle 13y ago
  I share this sentiment expressed in your post, coming from a similar upbringing. If we met at work, I'd imagine that we would quickly bond over the fact of having a similar outlook of the world we live in. My parents slaved away working all their lives similarly, and made a point to remind me of these children in their home country that have no chance of living a life like me. I grew up with this perspective and balance that guilt by doing community service and giving back to those less fortunate (note: not blindly donating but rather things like feeding the homeless etc). These are the cards that life has dealt us, be humble and give back when you can but to dwell on being born into an inescapable standard of living is just mentally taxing and quite harmful after a certain point.
CmonDev 13y ago
Government workers are an expenditure. Indie game developers are business that generates money for the country. Minecraft's Notch paid quite a lot of tax by the way.

194 points by sizzle 13y ago

I have a hunch that successful start-up founder that did not come from affluent families would share the same sentiment expressed by the game devs in the article. I'd like to hear some opinions on this issue. Being a first generation born in the U.S. myself, this cognitive dissonance in terms of higher tech-job salaries compared to my parents, resonates with me deeply. This really bothers me now since my parents spent their whole lives providing to get me here. I had a highly parsimonious upbringing, which has helped me spend wisely and save money. I can totally relate to these guys feelings.

jeremymcanally 13y ago
I can relate, too. My mom was a single mom, and for much of my childhood, she worked as a lunch lady where she made about $375 a month after taxes and the extortionately priced (IMO) insurance plan we were offered. She's now 60 and still works 12 hour days in a factory and has no retirement to speak of really. I do carry a lot of guilt that I easily make more in a week than she makes in a month, but at the same time, I know that's what she wanted for me when I was a kid. She was incredibly supportive of my hobby of programming and "computer stuff." She was super encouraging when it came to technology and learning more about it. I think she knew it would lead to a better life for me in the end, and for that, I'm incredibly grateful to her. And hey now that I'm doing well, I'm sure to return the favor whenever I'm able to (though she's rather proud so I usually have to slip it in around her birthday or Christmas ;)). So while yeah I still carry a bit of conflict over it, I also see it's what she wanted all along and am sure to show my appreciation as much as humanly possible.
- bm1362 13y ago
  I'm of a similar background. My brother and I are both software devs, making more than 3x as much out of college than her at 62. We both collectively send enough money that she has retired and stopped working. It's not my decision to make for you of course but you should consider reducing the burden.
- F_d_anconia 13y ago
  You're mother sounds like mine. That being said, I can almost guarantee that the single thing your mother wants for you is to be happy. I can also almost guarantee that what makes HER happy is knowing she did her part to provide the best possible situation for you to become successful and more importantly happy. What's funny is that us (the offspring) feel guilt over the one thing that both us and our parents had been striving for (our personal success). I am by no means successful by coloquial definition but I remember when my mother and I were living on welfare. I remember when I would help her with her janitorial job (it was embarrassing and I couldn't stand seeing her do it). But tl:dr... She and my father are comfortable now and I'm happily living paycheck to paycheck in the city I love. Come future success or not (I hope for the former) I support my mother's dream of seeing me happy and successful as she supports my dream of building a successful company. So do yourself a favor and called your mother, tell you you love her and you're happy with the life you have and will have. She'll appreciate it. Tl:dr:Call your damn mother and tell her you love her. Be happy with the success that you have that she set you up for the best she could.
- deleted 13y ago
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deleted 13y ago
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refurb 13y ago

Interesting and well written article. I think the issue that causes a lot of this emotion around money is the fact that we as a society like to think that the harder you work, the more money you make. It's obviously not a true statement at all. When you come into a lot of money for relatively little effort (the comparison of the kid vs. the mother), you start to feel like you don't deserve it at all. "Why do I get $1M for a few months work when my mom gets $20K/yr for busting her ass?"

gyardley 13y ago
You get $1M for a few months work because you work hard to put yourself in a position where you potentially could get $1M for a few months work, and then you get a little bit (okay, perhaps more than a little bit) lucky. It's interesting how different people react differently with respect to wealth. My relatively modest personal success is by no means solely a product of hard work - yes, I put myself in a position where I could get lucky, but I still needed a hell of a lot of luck. I didn't always know what I was doing, and things could've just as easily gone south. That said, I've never felt the slightest bit of guilt over anything related to money. The way I see it, undeservedly, disproportionately good things happen all the time in our society, and they have to happen to somebody. Why shouldn't that somebody be me?
- anigbrowl 13y ago
  So if something horrible happened to you - arising out of social structures, rather than getting hit by lightning, if you see what I mean - would you accept it with similar equanimity?
  - gyardley 13y ago
    Yes, I see what you mean. I make a distinction between the luck (or the lack of it) coming from societal structures, and the luck (or the lack of it) that comes from random events, chance meetings, the black box that is the AppStore, and so on. I was talking more about the latter, while it sounds like you're talking about the former. If you've been unlucky because of an accident of birth, rather than a random event, I wouldn't expect you to just shrug it off. While I've been more lucky than not, when I have been unlucky (primarily with my health, this last year was a little dodgy in a life-threatening sort of way) then yes, I've been pretty blasé about it.

jeffmo 13y ago

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sudden_wealth_syndrome http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sudden_wealth_syndrome

gammarator 13y ago
This article also talks about some of the unexpected emotional complications of extreme (relative) wealth: http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/print/2011/04/secret-fears-of-the-super-rich/308419 http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/print/2011/04/secret-fea...

ken47 13y ago

This speaks to the humility of said developers. There are plenty of people who would happily take the sudden millions without giving much thought to the morality of the situation.

sparkzilla 13y ago

Forbes estimates that the average game earns four thousand dollars? That doesn't seem right. I got 32 downloads ($32) for mine.

adamnemecek 13y ago
Angry birds made millions. If you average it out, you might get thousands. But yeah, knowing the average does not really give you all that much insight.
natejenkins 13y ago
That's the difference between the mean and the median. The median profit for a game is probably much closer to your number, but the mean is the average of all the games like yours (there are many) plus the rare game that makes $10 million or more.
xamlhacker 13y ago
I guess mean and median happen to be very different in this case.
hershel 13y ago
The median income for game in the app store was less than $1000 in 2011. I'm sure it has came down since.
deleted 13y ago
[deleted]
spada 13y ago
i recall reading something a couple years ago that ~800,000 apps on the store have zero downloads. average means very little here.

euske 13y ago

Although I'm not making much money myself, I can very well understand this guy's sentiment. As Eric Raymond pointed out, in a hacker community, good fame is sometimes more valued than money. But even fame can be sometimes too much.

jcampbell1 13y ago

Consider the following statements: A) We live in a meritocracy B) Meritocracies are fair Most people accept that A is false. We all know a fucktard that managed to get rich by being manipulative and destroying value. The problem is that people then fail to realize that B is also false. Meritocracies are not fair. Allocating wealth to the people that provide a large amount of entertainment, seems fair, but it is not fair in a broad sense of the word. Meritocracies reward those with good health, good luck, good parents who are encouraging, and the lucky gamete club who have high intelligence or exceptional physical skills. Meritocracies are like democracy: "the worst form of government except all the others that have been tried." Working hard on a startup doesn't really earn you anything. The best you can hope for is that hard work increases your luck surface area. Keep in mind, that there are people that came from better sperm and eggs who will work just as hard but have a much higher chance of success.

brc 13y ago
I read a lot of whining on this thread (and many other, recently as well). 'Fair' pops up a lot. The world is not fair. You can either spend your time griping, or you can spend your time living. I sense a lot of 'daddy' models of wealth swimming in peoples heads. http://paulgraham.com/gap.html http://paulgraham.com/gap.html If you didn't win the birth lottery it's not a death sentence. You can still win. Measure your progress against your own expectations, not against the lottery winners.
- barrkel 13y ago
  The world is not binary either, and that doesn't mean that we can't adjust society to increase or decrease the amount of fairness. It also doesn't mean that the adjusted amount of fairness in society and its rules (both laws and social norms) can't have positive or negative effects on overall total welfare. Oh, and also: nobody wins. Some just take longer to lose.
- almosnow 13y ago
  The way I see it. This guy didn't won the birh lottery but his mom worked her ass off so he could have a ticket at it. The fact that he feels guilty of basically having accomplished everything that his mother ever wished for him should be a very dishonirable situation. Ooh the humanity...

ssully 13y ago

Not sure if this happens to many people who are well immersed in the tech industry now, but I have had my future career reduced to just "sitting at a desk all day" by friends going into more "labor" intensive careers. They constantly bring it up as something they would never want to do because it sounds boring. This also leads to some resentment from them when I have had a steady paid internship since my sophomore year of college, while all they have gotten is unpaid internships or nothing at all. I personally have never let this bother me because I know what goes into my work and I know how difficult it can be. Despite that I do believe those stigmas attached to my job from friends could creep in on me if I were in a bad place in my life, or maybe even in an excellent financial situation like many of the devs in this article. It's

jwatte 13y ago

That article has terrible fact checking. Braid being the first indie success? How about "Doom"? Games having questionable moral and artistic value? Would you ask the same thing about a TV show? The article at the same time got out wrong, and said nothing I thought was worth saying.

eropple 13y ago
The modern indie "movement" is largely defined as being a reaction to the large, corporatized state of game development around when--wait for it--Braid came out. So using that as a signpost is both valid and sensical. And many games have questionable moral and artistic value. Maybe even most. That makes the ones that reach past that so wonderful.

marincounty 13y ago

They shouldn't feel guilty, but if thy were hired by their friend in the early 2000's, with no programming experience, and the friends father set up the Everything; Don't act like you were the Horatio Alger of the Computer industry. I remember a whole lot of drinking, not much programming, and a large company buying your company out. The company looked at your company and shut it down. My real agrivation is this "friend" don't tell me what a cake walk it was back then(he made it out like they were all geniuses)--yes, when I found out the real scoop, I was a little surprised he didn't ever come clean with me. The problem was I gave this dude a fair amout of money when his family pretty much cut him off, and we were all at the age when we were looking for a little help.(The dude was always broke whenever we did anything.) I'm not bitter, but just surprised. I guess he was trying to impress his girlfriend with all the genius stuff?

notastartup 13y ago

How do you replicate such an overnight success with games? What is the most common trait for such titles? It just sheer luck of the draw?

CmonDev 13y ago
A lot of quality and a bit of innovation for indies - craft is not agile. Personal brand helps. Marketing for those with money.

noname123 13y ago

I think it has to do with the cognitive dissonance between society's judgement onto individuals to amass wealth and that individual's sense of personal fulfillment. Suppose you're an immigrant who won the H1B lottery to come to US from Nepal and earn 10-20x the notional amount of income you'd at home, way more than your parents. Would you be happy? Like the immigrant, children of the families whose mom's earned only $20K was launched from their socio-economicsphere to another one, the millionaire and above and one citizen in the elite citizenry of one million. Like the immigrant, the children of suddenly acquired wealth still identify the values of his/her original "homeland," values such as humility and hard work instead of vanities and the weariness of those who have had a luxury to be "anxious" about self-fulfillment. The immigrants will not find a sense of belonging, a sense of even accomplishment in the new land. Strangely, they find themselves bewildered as their families and the mantras of what they've been reciting all their lives all have touted as the "touchstone" of their journey. Now that they've arrived, they feel first elated, then slight flatlined, then keeping up the appearances and confused and then cheated and robbed. We've been telling ourselves that starting that startup, taking that job offer, going that school will enable us to have the X: the money, the respect, the cachet, the X and only after X, we'll be whole and then we'll really do the Y, what we really want to do. Or we lock ourselves in a mental prison, disavowing what society have imposed on us regarding X and paint a black & white picture of us pursuing Y and the man forcing X on our throat. But why do we not consider ourselves whole? That is the question we push to the back of my mind chasing the X's and Y's of the day in an attempt to make up for the feeling of incompleteness (like a snake devouring its tail).

sizzle 13y ago
I often go down these paths of reasoning, then end up questioning my existence and realizing how short life truly is. This keeps me from dwelling too much on unavoidable situations in the day-to-day. I have experienced the phenomenon of "launching" into a higher socio-economic sphere, being a first generation born in the US. Once I realized my parents could never relate and that they provided this opportunity for me to surpass their standard of living, the money stopped mattering as much as the time I spent with my parents fleeting existence. I would live with the lifelong regret of chasing more money over helping my parents in their last stages of their lives. That's why I chose to stay somewhat local and take care of them, a nursing home would never even begin to cross my mind. I owe my successes in life to their hard work, and it makes me feel complete to make sure they never have to suffer through that stress of providing again. I often wonder what it's like with friends that get kicked out at 18 and have to fend for themselves. Interesting dichotomy.

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enowbi 13y ago

This story encapsulates the complexities of the human nature. For every individual with guilt about his new-found wealth there at least two on the other extreme who would loose no sleep over it and sometimes even if the wealth is ill-gotten.

drawkbox 13y ago

Games, like comic strips and a good laugh, are crucial to keeping people happy. There is lots of value to what games bring for education and allowing a person to get lost in fun for a few moments. Games that bring joy should enrich a developer that brings it. It is amazing how things have changed though, he wouldn't have gotten rich even 10 years ago as there would have been no outlet. That shows the importance of the new industries and how the money is somewhat actually going to creators, where before they create and come away with nothing.

cdcarter 13y ago

If you've suddenly or not so suddenly come into more money than you need for your day-to-day lifestyle, I am more than willing to help you find a not-for-profit hunger relief, education, or arts organization in your local community. It can be hard to find not-for-profits that have good administrations and align with your values. Working in the industry has helped me identify them, plus I know quite a few areas of the US from having lived there. I'm happy to share any expertise I may have to help you find a public charity in your community worth supporting. Email is in my profile.

eeeficus 13y ago

OK give me the money and I'll deal with the guilt!

thelogos 13y ago

I can't really relate to how these guys feel because I've never been that rich but I can definitely relate to some of that guilt that they're speaking of, watching my own mother wake up every morning to slave away in a factory. Just travel around, go to SE Asia for example and look around. You'll see little 6 years old kids selling chewing gum and bottled water at the bus station. I really can't tell you how I feel seeing this day after day. Little kids should be happy. They should be playing with their friends and going to school. Not selling lottery tickets and chewing gum at a bus stop. When I was young, I went to school with many kids like this. Most of them drop out because their parents couldn't pay for tution and books. While I'm not anywhere close to rich, I might as well be Bill Gates compared to these kids. So I wonder to myself, why should I have all this while they have nothing? The guilt plays itself on many levels. When I feel like I'm slacking off, I think about my mother. I think about all those poor kids. I've been given so much, yet I'm still not good enough to take full advantage of it. I hope that one day if I ever become rich, I won't be so delusional as to think that that a huge part of success isn't just luck. For some reason, the older I get, the more I keep dwelling on the fact that life is incredibly shitty and unfair to 99% of the people out there. Strange, whereas many people I know instead look at their richer peers and wonder, why shouldn't I have more?

sizzle 13y ago
I share this sentiment expressed in your post, coming from a similar upbringing. If we met at work, I'd imagine that we would quickly bond over the fact of having a similar outlook of the world we live in. My parents slaved away working all their lives similarly, and made a point to remind me of these children in their home country that have no chance of living a life like me. I grew up with this perspective and balance that guilt by doing community service and giving back to those less fortunate (note: not blindly donating but rather things like feeding the homeless etc). These are the cards that life has dealt us, be humble and give back when you can but to dwell on being born into an inescapable standard of living is just mentally taxing and quite harmful after a certain point.

CmonDev 13y ago

Government workers are an expenditure. Indie game developers are business that generates money for the country. Minecraft's Notch paid quite a lot of tax by the way.