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I think it's like being a man in an all-girls gathering. You can either be awkward or the center of attention. It depends on your perception and how you would p

I think it's like being a man in an all-girls gathering. You can either be awkward or the center of attention. It depends on your perception and how you would present yourself.

mbillie1 13y ago
> You can either be awkward or the center of attention. Or you could, say, not radically alter your behavior based on the genders of the people around you.
- kbenson 13y ago
  Or you could, say, accept that in most cultures the shared experience of associating with a specific gender while growing up leads to topics and conversations that are easier to have, sustain, and enjoy while talking to people of the same gender. This doesn't require you "radically alter your behavior", just that you understand that different groups of people often accept and find topics interesting at different levels.
  - deleted 13y ago
    [deleted]
  - mbillie1 13y ago
    Accepting it is exactly what I don't want to do - the only way common biases (like "it's weird/uncomfortable/etc being the only man speaking in a group of women") change is when they are overcome rather than accepted.
    - kbenson 13y ago
      I'm not sure it's something that can - or event should - be overcome. Being a small minority in any setting, for any reason, whether is be physical characteristics, beliefs or experience can be alienating to some degree, that's a characteristic of being a minority. You are free to let that affect you in whatever way you see fit, and you are also free to use that to your advantage. For an example that plays off the original poster's idea, imagine a group of 6 couples, 5 of which have children, and a single couple that does not. Conversation may drift into parenthood related topics based on the high percentage of parents present. The childless couple can choose their own level of involvement in this conversation, and the two ends of the spectrum are probably awkwardness and center of attention. The center of attention strategy is fairly easy to achieve in this scenario. Profess your ignorance to child rearing strategies, and you will almost instantly be regaled with countless tales from those present...
- gfodor 13y ago
  hormones, emotions, and sexuality are a hell of a drug
prawn 13y ago
Huh? Or you can just be comfortable and act normally, contributing where appropriate.
alxp 13y ago
Girls? Like 8 year olds? Who says 'girls' anymore?
- varkson 13y ago
  Dunno where you live but a lot of people do.
teemo_cute 13y ago
Common guys. The downvotes are okay (points don't mean anything anyways). I just like to explain that what I wrote is a metaphor and that's it. It ain't to be taken literally.
- deleted 13y ago
  [deleted]

I think it's like being a man in an all-girls gathering. You can either be awkward or the center of attention. It depends on your perception and how you would present yourself.

mbillie1 13y ago

> You can either be awkward or the center of attention. Or you could, say, not radically alter your behavior based on the genders of the people around you.

kbenson 13y ago
Or you could, say, accept that in most cultures the shared experience of associating with a specific gender while growing up leads to topics and conversations that are easier to have, sustain, and enjoy while talking to people of the same gender. This doesn't require you "radically alter your behavior", just that you understand that different groups of people often accept and find topics interesting at different levels.
- deleted 13y ago
  [deleted]
- mbillie1 13y ago
  Accepting it is exactly what I don't want to do - the only way common biases (like "it's weird/uncomfortable/etc being the only man speaking in a group of women") change is when they are overcome rather than accepted.
  - kbenson 13y ago
    I'm not sure it's something that can - or event should - be overcome. Being a small minority in any setting, for any reason, whether is be physical characteristics, beliefs or experience can be alienating to some degree, that's a characteristic of being a minority. You are free to let that affect you in whatever way you see fit, and you are also free to use that to your advantage. For an example that plays off the original poster's idea, imagine a group of 6 couples, 5 of which have children, and a single couple that does not. Conversation may drift into parenthood related topics based on the high percentage of parents present. The childless couple can choose their own level of involvement in this conversation, and the two ends of the spectrum are probably awkwardness and center of attention. The center of attention strategy is fairly easy to achieve in this scenario. Profess your ignorance to child rearing strategies, and you will almost instantly be regaled with countless tales from those present...
gfodor 13y ago
hormones, emotions, and sexuality are a hell of a drug

prawn 13y ago

Huh? Or you can just be comfortable and act normally, contributing where appropriate.

alxp 13y ago

Girls? Like 8 year olds? Who says 'girls' anymore?

varkson 13y ago
Dunno where you live but a lot of people do.

teemo_cute 13y ago

Common guys. The downvotes are okay (points don't mean anything anyways). I just like to explain that what I wrote is a metaphor and that's it. It ain't to be taken literally.

deleted 13y ago
[deleted]