8 ms·

Julie was banging a co-worker so why is she acting surprised when drama happened ? I don't get it.

by h1karu 13y ago

qdog 13y ago
I work for a large, bureaucratic company. The only restrictions on dating (and we have a ton of HR rules) is about reports. As long as you neither of you report to each other or have any influence on position etc., corporate has no problem with dating. I can't imagine a startup caring unless you actually cause the drama, and this doesn't sound like that case. Grow up.
- trhway 13y ago
  well, the founder's wife has some issue with Julia. The story sounds like a fight for a position of an alpha-female. That gives non-zero probability to the idea that either Julia's partner may have been of some interest to the wife, or Julia's behavior toward the founder looked like a challenge to the wife.
  - qdog 13y ago
    Possibly, but the story didn't mention any conflict over the person she is/was seeing. The founder's wife definitely seems to have a problem with Julie, but it isn't clear from the tech crunch article why that was originally.
- h1karu 13y ago
  There's a huge difference between startups and a huge corporation!! think small teams. I'm not saying it shouldn't be done at all I'm just saying one should expect drama in the workplace after you decide to cross over that rubicon, especially in a software startup
xupybd 13y ago
I don't think it's fair to point to her relationship as the cause of this. I also think that, referring to her relationship as "banging a co-worker", may be an example of the kind of behaviour that creates an uncomfortable atmosphere for women in I.T.
- h1karu 13y ago
  She was engaging in a personal relationship with the founder's spouse as well as a sexual relationship with a coworker. How is that not asking for jealousy related drama ? Does it really matter how that drama eventually manifests ? I don't think so. I'm just trying to hold her to the same standards that a male would be held to.
ketralnis 13y ago
(1) Her "banging" a co-worker is his and her problem, not yours (2) Neither side claims that said drama was related to said "banging" (3) Grow up
- h1karu 13y ago
  There's a double standard out there. Single women are expected to sleep with coworkers and if drama arises then it's not their fault, but men are expected to refrain from sleeping with coworkers and if relationship drama arises then it's always the man's fault if he dipped his pen in company ink. Your remark "grow up" is merely a logical fallacy used to conceal this double standard. The "banging" was mentioned in the techcrunch article so it's definitely on-topic. How do you know that the other woman's jealousy was not aroused by Julie's projection of sexuality into the workplace via her demonstration of willingness to hook up with employees ? When Julie hooked up with an employee she was demonstrating that in general she's willing to hook up with employees which put her on the other women's radar as a potential personal/political rival. I seriously doubt the other woman would have felt threatened if Julie's romantic foray hadn't come into play.. Again.. a reasonable guy would never have made a post about this kind of thing on hackernews instead he would have just accepted the drama as the consequence of his risky choice to engage in romance in the workplace. He would have just bit the bullet and moved on. Julie on the other hand is wilding out and she comes off as an unprofessional drama queen.

Julie was banging a co-worker so why is she acting surprised when drama happened ? I don't get it.

by h1karu 13y ago

Julie was banging a co-worker so why is she acting surprised when drama happened ? I don't get it.

qdog 13y ago

I work for a large, bureaucratic company. The only restrictions on dating (and we have a ton of HR rules) is about reports. As long as you neither of you report to each other or have any influence on position etc., corporate has no problem with dating. I can't imagine a startup caring unless you actually cause the drama, and this doesn't sound like that case. Grow up.

trhway 13y ago
well, the founder's wife has some issue with Julia. The story sounds like a fight for a position of an alpha-female. That gives non-zero probability to the idea that either Julia's partner may have been of some interest to the wife, or Julia's behavior toward the founder looked like a challenge to the wife.
- qdog 13y ago
  Possibly, but the story didn't mention any conflict over the person she is/was seeing. The founder's wife definitely seems to have a problem with Julie, but it isn't clear from the tech crunch article why that was originally.
h1karu 13y ago
There's a huge difference between startups and a huge corporation!! think small teams. I'm not saying it shouldn't be done at all I'm just saying one should expect drama in the workplace after you decide to cross over that rubicon, especially in a software startup

xupybd 13y ago

I don't think it's fair to point to her relationship as the cause of this. I also think that, referring to her relationship as "banging a co-worker", may be an example of the kind of behaviour that creates an uncomfortable atmosphere for women in I.T.

h1karu 13y ago
She was engaging in a personal relationship with the founder's spouse as well as a sexual relationship with a coworker. How is that not asking for jealousy related drama ? Does it really matter how that drama eventually manifests ? I don't think so. I'm just trying to hold her to the same standards that a male would be held to.

ketralnis 13y ago

(1) Her "banging" a co-worker is his and her problem, not yours (2) Neither side claims that said drama was related to said "banging" (3) Grow up

h1karu 13y ago
There's a double standard out there. Single women are expected to sleep with coworkers and if drama arises then it's not their fault, but men are expected to refrain from sleeping with coworkers and if relationship drama arises then it's always the man's fault if he dipped his pen in company ink. Your remark "grow up" is merely a logical fallacy used to conceal this double standard. The "banging" was mentioned in the techcrunch article so it's definitely on-topic. How do you know that the other woman's jealousy was not aroused by Julie's projection of sexuality into the workplace via her demonstration of willingness to hook up with employees ? When Julie hooked up with an employee she was demonstrating that in general she's willing to hook up with employees which put her on the other women's radar as a potential personal/political rival. I seriously doubt the other woman would have felt threatened if Julie's romantic foray hadn't come into play.. Again.. a reasonable guy would never have made a post about this kind of thing on hackernews instead he would have just accepted the drama as the consequence of his risky choice to engage in romance in the workplace. He would have just bit the bullet and moved on. Julie on the other hand is wilding out and she comes off as an unprofessional drama queen.