My observation is that it is very easy to misunderstand stories like the hoola hoop example. Imagine 2 scenarios: a) a company where we stipulate that there i

My observation is that it is very easy to misunderstand stories like the hoola hoop example. Imagine 2 scenarios: a) a company where we stipulate that there is no sexism and women feel respected and valued b) a company where to stipulate that there is widespread sexism and women detect a myriad of signs of it every day. In scenario a) the hoola hoop incident is highly unlikely to spark a reaction from a woman but in scenario b) this may be offensive to her. The problem for the woman in b) is that it isn't really the hoola hoop 'leering'that offends her so much as it is the culmination of a series of attitudes and slights. But of course, if she complains about the hoola hoop behavior she can easily look petty. Each such incident can seem trivial but the pattern isn't. It is a real dilemma for women how to handle this kind of atmosphere gracefully and it is probably impossible for them to do so without some men tarring them as being nutty oversensitive rad fems.