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It just doesn't make any sense. And people often pay such high costs in the pursuit of acceptance that I wish that more people would just stop, think about what
by BlackDeath3 13y ago
It just doesn't make any sense. And people often pay such high costs in the pursuit of acceptance that I wish that more people would just stop, think about what they're doing, and realize how ridiculous it is. They don't need to worry so much about it. They don't need to spend so much time thinking about it.
It just seems like you would have so much more time and energy to spend on other things when you stop thinking like an animal.
- untog 13y agoWell, sure. But "being lonely" doesn't make any objective sense either- yet it is still very much an emotion that many people feel. I'm not sure of the value in examining human behaviour while also dismissing the motivators of that behaviour as being silly.
- BlackDeath3 13y agoIs there not a large, wide spectrum between "being lonely" and "fitting in"? In fact, I would imagine that there are so many alternatives that the phrase "spectrum" is simply too one-dimensional. The value is that I imagine (no data here, just conjecture) that many people could be much happier and freer to focus on other pursuits (that I feel are more worthy but I realize that this is entirely subjective) and not be so worried about "what do they think?". Because humans will be humans (as you've pointed out) I don't expect to change any minds here, but this is the way that I think. If nothing else, I'm simply giving away some food for thought.
- JonnieCache 13y agoThe thing that motivates people to buy expensive clothes is exactly the same as the thing that's motivating you to write these comments. People don't really want to fit in with others, they want to fit in with themselves. For some people that involves being the kind of person that buys expensive clothes. For you, that involves being the kind of person that doesn't buy expensive clothes. There is no difference, except that your thing is not externally visible, so you have to tell us about it. And you get to keep all that disposable income I guess. You're also avoiding the identity equivalent of running your whole business on a 3rd party API, which is what people who base themselves on brands are doing. So you're probably ahead. But not really any different.
- BlackDeath3 13y agoI think that you may have missed my point. This isn't about buying expensive clothes, or being one of those people who doesn't buy expensive clothes. I'm not making my decision in order to fit in. I try not to worry about it, because I've come to the conclusion that it doesn't make much sense to worry about it.
- jff 13y agoIf you weren't worried about it, you wouldn't be posting about it so much.
- BlackDeath3 13y agoI'm putting effort into trying to get people to think about things in a different way. That's what I'm "worried" about. If by "it" you mean buying expensive clothes, I think that you've missed the point. Then again, given your posts, it seems that you make a habit of missing the point. I suppose I'll move on.
- jff 13y agoI guarantee you do it too. Possibly in a way you're blind to, but you're doing it. If you're an American, did you watch the Superbowl yesterday? Or did you smugly tell people you're not interested in sportsball?
- BlackDeath3 13y agoI usually don't watch football (even the Superbowl), but I did actually watch it yesterday. I don't really see what that has to do with fitting in. I could just as easily have not watched it. And by the way, even if I do do it, that's just as silly as anybody else doing it. Don't confuse the philosopher with the philosophy.
- jff 13y agoMy point is that people do a lot of things as signals to groups. When someone (apparently not you) goes out of his way to tell people he doesn't watch the Superbowl, maybe because "European football is so much better" or "grown men playing with balls", he's making a statement about himself to others. Same with those people who are so eager to tell you they don't even own a TV--they're projecting an image, they might as well wear a t-shirt that says "too cultured for television". When you posted here wondering why people try to hard to be accepted, that was your way of telling others "I am the kind of person who doesn't care about expensive clothes or following popular trends".
- BlackDeath3 13y agoYou see equivalent actions and ascribe equivalent intent. You can say what you want to about me, but I think you're overlooking a key difference here.