Agreed. Point being, we oftentimes overlook the very powerful ability to de-escalate a conflict by refusing to respond in kind. I think part of this stems from

Agreed. Point being, we oftentimes overlook the very powerful ability to de-escalate a conflict by refusing to respond in kind. I think part of this stems from the way people often picture the response of the other party in their minds when they formulate a piece of communication. If that response is level-headed and downright nice when they expect it to be rude, you can completely unman them diffuse the situation. Just the fact that the response is very different from what was expected is often enough to cause the other party to reevaluate their position. "(Hold on, this reply is not what I expected, my understanding of the situation could be flawed, must reevaluate.") The crazy thing is, the substance of your reply can be absolutely the same, but if you phrase it humbly and nicely you can often obtain a much better result. Call it social hacking :)