4 ms·

Why can't non-married couples give each other power-of-attorney for those things? I ask this not rhetorically.

fosap 13y ago
I'm not from the us, but i do have these powers form my sister and my parents (and they do for me). We can for each other decide what medical procedures should and shouldn't be done. In a extreme case that hopefully does not happen soon we may even decide life sustaining measures to be stopped. Where I'm from one can simply give such powers to another person.
GFK_of_xmaspast 13y ago
The trick is getting hospitals to not ignore PoA: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/04/12/roger-gorley-arrested-gay-sick-partner-hospital_n_3069481.html http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/04/12/roger-gorley-arrest...
stevenbedrick 13y ago
I imagine that it depends on the state (or country, if we're not being US-centric), but many non-married couples can and do set up durable powers of attorney (PoA), advance medical directives, wills, and so on. As a sibling commenter noted, the trick is then getting the hospital, partner's family, etc. to recognize the PoA document; while the law surrounding powers of attorney is generally quite clear, there are certainly plenty of horror stories of hospitals, families, etc. ignoring such documents. I imagine that the likelihood of this happening varies from state to state, hospital to hospital, possibly even doctor to doctor, and so on. That said, in the US, basically all of the time, you'll be _far_ better off for having drawn up a durable power of attorney than you would be if you hadn't. Definitely money well-spent if you're in an unmarried partnership. I suggest finding a lawyer who specializes in LGBTQ family law; they generally will be happy to take any couple on as clients, regardless of whether they are same/opposite sex, cis/trans, etc., and they have literally "seen it all," which means that they know about all kinds of legal edge cases that can cause trouble for people in a non-married partnership. As an aside, I'm continually amazed by how many _married_ couples don't have wills, PoA documents, advance directives, etc. etc. filled out. Even if it's not strictly necessary from a legal perspective, having one's wishes and instructions written down explicitly is a relatively small-seeming thing that can make a very bad situation noticeably less awful (or so I've heard from people who've been there).
tommorris 13y ago
They can. It's expensive and often doesn't work when you need it most. Lots and lots of long-term gay couples can attest to the expense, complication and ineffectiveness of trying to replicate marriage through contract law and other civil deeds.

fosap 13y ago

I'm not from the us, but i do have these powers form my sister and my parents (and they do for me). We can for each other decide what medical procedures should and shouldn't be done. In a extreme case that hopefully does not happen soon we may even decide life sustaining measures to be stopped. Where I'm from one can simply give such powers to another person.

GFK_of_xmaspast 13y ago

The trick is getting hospitals to not ignore PoA: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/04/12/roger-gorley-arrested-gay-sick-partner-hospital_n_3069481.html http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/04/12/roger-gorley-arrest...

stevenbedrick 13y ago

I imagine that it depends on the state (or country, if we're not being US-centric), but many non-married couples can and do set up durable powers of attorney (PoA), advance medical directives, wills, and so on. As a sibling commenter noted, the trick is then getting the hospital, partner's family, etc. to recognize the PoA document; while the law surrounding powers of attorney is generally quite clear, there are certainly plenty of horror stories of hospitals, families, etc. ignoring such documents. I imagine that the likelihood of this happening varies from state to state, hospital to hospital, possibly even doctor to doctor, and so on. That said, in the US, basically all of the time, you'll be _far_ better off for having drawn up a durable power of attorney than you would be if you hadn't. Definitely money well-spent if you're in an unmarried partnership. I suggest finding a lawyer who specializes in LGBTQ family law; they generally will be happy to take any couple on as clients, regardless of whether they are same/opposite sex, cis/trans, etc., and they have literally "seen it all," which means that they know about all kinds of legal edge cases that can cause trouble for people in a non-married partnership. As an aside, I'm continually amazed by how many _married_ couples don't have wills, PoA documents, advance directives, etc. etc. filled out. Even if it's not strictly necessary from a legal perspective, having one's wishes and instructions written down explicitly is a relatively small-seeming thing that can make a very bad situation noticeably less awful (or so I've heard from people who've been there).

tommorris 13y ago

They can. It's expensive and often doesn't work when you need it most. Lots and lots of long-term gay couples can attest to the expense, complication and ineffectiveness of trying to replicate marriage through contract law and other civil deeds.