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> It was first date number 88. A second date followed, then a third. After two weeks they both suspended their OkCupid accounts. You know... there's a damn big

> It was first date number 88. A second date followed, then a third. After two weeks they both suspended their OkCupid accounts. You know... there's a damn big chance you find someone worth having a relationship after 88 dates. Something tells me his technique was no better than just dating at random.

jchung 13y ago
This is a testable hypothesis.
gedrap 13y ago
Or, let's admit it, he sucked in real life human relationships. I mean we all sucked in first X dates, just, hopefully, took less than 88 to realize that whatever you are doing is just wrong :)
diminoten 13y ago
No better? Arguably much worse, if it took 88 attempts...
technotony 13y ago
I think you are missing the point of his strategy. Before this he had 6 dates in nine months, his primary problem was the top of the funnel. I don't think this strategy helped him improve quality, but it did lead to quantity which at the end of the day got him this result. And I think with online dating quantity matters as the signals you are using to select are so poor.
cperciva 13y ago
He wasn't optimizing for "finding a good match". He was optimizing for "get dates with the type of people who might turn out to be good matches".
- izaidi 13y ago
  Even so, it speaks poorly of his method (or maybe just his personality?) that it took 90 dates to actually find a good match.
  - nostrademons 13y ago
    Friend of mine used to run a dating site. She said that on average it took people about 6 months of solid dating, usually 50-100 dates, before they found a good match. There are some people that get into relationships much more quickly, but oftentimes those are the same people who get out of relationships really quickly, because they didn't choose a good match to begin with. There are also outliers who find someone great when they're not really looking, but they are outliers. Think of it this way: someone who went on 90 dates before they found a match set their bar at the 99th percentile. Someone who went on 10 dates set their bar at the 90th percentile. Someone who went on 2 set their bar at the 50th percentile. These aren't exact figures - there's luck involved too - but they illustrate the trade-off involved.
    - jaimebuelta 13y ago
      It seems quite weird to me that 100 dates are needed before founding a "good match" (I guess that means something you date more than a couple times). Seems like an incredibly inefficient (and potentially emotionally complicated) process, even will all the "magic algorithm" part. If this is truly a numbers game, not sure if speed dating or something similar is a much better approach...
ahomescu1 13y ago
"First dates" in the context of this article sound more like "approaches" in real life, rather than actual dates. In real life dating, you'd go up to someone first, chat for a bit, then ask for an actual date. OKCupid removes the physical/verbal interaction and visual cues (along with body language), which are really important to most people. I wonder if the next generation of dating sites will match people based on facial expressions and body language (captured by a Kinect, for example), instead of all these stupid quiz questions.
jules 13y ago
His method did get him on 88 dates. At his previous dating rate that would have taken 6 years.

jchung 13y ago

This is a testable hypothesis.

gedrap 13y ago

Or, let's admit it, he sucked in real life human relationships. I mean we all sucked in first X dates, just, hopefully, took less than 88 to realize that whatever you are doing is just wrong :)

diminoten 13y ago

No better? Arguably much worse, if it took 88 attempts...

technotony 13y ago

I think you are missing the point of his strategy. Before this he had 6 dates in nine months, his primary problem was the top of the funnel. I don't think this strategy helped him improve quality, but it did lead to quantity which at the end of the day got him this result. And I think with online dating quantity matters as the signals you are using to select are so poor.

cperciva 13y ago

He wasn't optimizing for "finding a good match". He was optimizing for "get dates with the type of people who might turn out to be good matches".

izaidi 13y ago
Even so, it speaks poorly of his method (or maybe just his personality?) that it took 90 dates to actually find a good match.
- nostrademons 13y ago
  Friend of mine used to run a dating site. She said that on average it took people about 6 months of solid dating, usually 50-100 dates, before they found a good match. There are some people that get into relationships much more quickly, but oftentimes those are the same people who get out of relationships really quickly, because they didn't choose a good match to begin with. There are also outliers who find someone great when they're not really looking, but they are outliers. Think of it this way: someone who went on 90 dates before they found a match set their bar at the 99th percentile. Someone who went on 10 dates set their bar at the 90th percentile. Someone who went on 2 set their bar at the 50th percentile. These aren't exact figures - there's luck involved too - but they illustrate the trade-off involved.
  - jaimebuelta 13y ago
    It seems quite weird to me that 100 dates are needed before founding a "good match" (I guess that means something you date more than a couple times). Seems like an incredibly inefficient (and potentially emotionally complicated) process, even will all the "magic algorithm" part. If this is truly a numbers game, not sure if speed dating or something similar is a much better approach...

ahomescu1 13y ago

"First dates" in the context of this article sound more like "approaches" in real life, rather than actual dates. In real life dating, you'd go up to someone first, chat for a bit, then ask for an actual date. OKCupid removes the physical/verbal interaction and visual cues (along with body language), which are really important to most people. I wonder if the next generation of dating sites will match people based on facial expressions and body language (captured by a Kinect, for example), instead of all these stupid quiz questions.

jules 13y ago

His method did get him on 88 dates. At his previous dating rate that would have taken 6 years.