5 ms·

Is this kind of recall common? I ask because I also had a not-fun time at high school, but I remember very little about it. Names get mentioned - especially o

Is this kind of recall common? I ask because I also had a not-fun time at high school, but I remember very little about it. Names get mentioned - especially on Facebook - of people who I apparently went to school with (and it was a small school), but I remember pretty much nothing about the people. I also have only vague memories of the school itself. Sorry for veering off-topic, but I've been wondering about my memory lately, and just how much worse it is than the average.

jacquesm 17y ago
I find that memory is strange, not 'bad' or 'good'. In general it will remember stuff for a while unless you concentrate hard. Bad stuff might get 'forgotten' a little quicker than good stuff, or the reverse. Stuff that you really want to remember sometimes gets lost for no apparent reason. I used to be able to remember just about everything that I wanted but lately (now almost 45) that is getting noticeably harder. Traumatic stuff is in a class of its own. Some people will never be able to get away from it, others have it suppressed to the point where it might as well not have happened.
- anonthistime 17y ago
  Have to be anonymous for this as it is a little too personal for comfort. My earliest memories are from probably extremely traumatic situations: Finding my mother's boyfriend dead from a heroin overdose in his bed (both were addicts) and watching an ambulance crew carry him out. Eating raw pasta when our mother had left us alone in the house for days. Being taken from our house by social workers (I remember parts of the drive from there in vivid detail). I was four or five at that time. The funny thing is I don't remember how I felt at the time, but the scenes are etched in my memory. Oh well, make of it what you want, it just came back to me when reading your post :)
  - jacquesm 17y ago
    I don't really know what to say to that other than that I'm really happy to see you on the 'other side' of that and alive and apparently well. I thought I had had it pretty rough at some times in my past, you make me feel like I had a very easy childhood. Wow.
  - anonthistime 17y ago
    Oh yeah, I didn't go to my high school re-union either. I liked the people I went to class with at the time, but the memories from the time are painful so I really have no desire to stir them. At the same time I go to my college re-union every year, which is associated with a time when life became stable.
  - run4yourlives 17y ago
    My only response to you would be that you should take immense pride in the fact that you beat the odds. (Just by posting here I'm sure you have) You've faced a challenge in life that would destroy most people, and you overcame it. I can only wish that I have the same determination as you.
    - anonthistime 17y ago
      Thanks, seriously. I don't know that I am extraordinarily resilient or if the circumstances just sound worse to an outsider than they really were. In either case I don't have to think too hard to come up with somebody who has it worse than me, which is always a sobering thought.
lanaer 17y ago
I remember very little of school (my experience was meh, not bad). Sometimes (again on Facebook) I’ll see a name that seems familiar, but I can’t remember the person. Some (few) other people I remember clearly. An addendum: I can’t even remember college that clearly. More clearly than HS, but I can’t remember the names of most of my instructors. Where by “most” I mean all but one, and I only remember his name because he also became a friend.
arghnoname 17y ago
I think you tend to remember the things you think about. I don't think about the past very often myself, or the 'glory days' of high school or whatever, so it's all a blur to me. At least that's how I hope it works because if it doesn't, I have severe brain damage.

jacquesm 17y ago

I find that memory is strange, not 'bad' or 'good'. In general it will remember stuff for a while unless you concentrate hard. Bad stuff might get 'forgotten' a little quicker than good stuff, or the reverse. Stuff that you really want to remember sometimes gets lost for no apparent reason. I used to be able to remember just about everything that I wanted but lately (now almost 45) that is getting noticeably harder. Traumatic stuff is in a class of its own. Some people will never be able to get away from it, others have it suppressed to the point where it might as well not have happened.

anonthistime 17y ago
Have to be anonymous for this as it is a little too personal for comfort. My earliest memories are from probably extremely traumatic situations: Finding my mother's boyfriend dead from a heroin overdose in his bed (both were addicts) and watching an ambulance crew carry him out. Eating raw pasta when our mother had left us alone in the house for days. Being taken from our house by social workers (I remember parts of the drive from there in vivid detail). I was four or five at that time. The funny thing is I don't remember how I felt at the time, but the scenes are etched in my memory. Oh well, make of it what you want, it just came back to me when reading your post :)
- jacquesm 17y ago
  I don't really know what to say to that other than that I'm really happy to see you on the 'other side' of that and alive and apparently well. I thought I had had it pretty rough at some times in my past, you make me feel like I had a very easy childhood. Wow.
- anonthistime 17y ago
  Oh yeah, I didn't go to my high school re-union either. I liked the people I went to class with at the time, but the memories from the time are painful so I really have no desire to stir them. At the same time I go to my college re-union every year, which is associated with a time when life became stable.
- run4yourlives 17y ago
  My only response to you would be that you should take immense pride in the fact that you beat the odds. (Just by posting here I'm sure you have) You've faced a challenge in life that would destroy most people, and you overcame it. I can only wish that I have the same determination as you.
  - anonthistime 17y ago
    Thanks, seriously. I don't know that I am extraordinarily resilient or if the circumstances just sound worse to an outsider than they really were. In either case I don't have to think too hard to come up with somebody who has it worse than me, which is always a sobering thought.

lanaer 17y ago

I remember very little of school (my experience was meh, not bad). Sometimes (again on Facebook) I’ll see a name that seems familiar, but I can’t remember the person. Some (few) other people I remember clearly. An addendum: I can’t even remember college that clearly. More clearly than HS, but I can’t remember the names of most of my instructors. Where by “most” I mean all but one, and I only remember his name because he also became a friend.

arghnoname 17y ago

I think you tend to remember the things you think about. I don't think about the past very often myself, or the 'glory days' of high school or whatever, so it's all a blur to me. At least that's how I hope it works because if it doesn't, I have severe brain damage.