5 ms·

Asking for a friend, what do you do if you don't have anyone to talk to? I feel like the answer should be obvious, but I have no idea what it is.

chad_oliver 13y ago
There are quite a few hotlines which have volunteers who are willing to listen. I'm not sure if that's the sort of thing your friend is looking for, but it's certainly better than nothing.
abstractbill 13y ago
There's a YC startup for everything these days: http://www.7cupsoftea.com/ http://www.7cupsoftea.com/
- deleted 13y ago
  [deleted]
bazzargh 13y ago
In the UK, there's the Samaritans helpline, which is completely anonymous; the NHS also help, you can talk to your GP in confidence. I don't know exactly who to call elsewhere, but as chad_oliver says the helplines are there. http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/ http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/ lets you search for a local support group in the USA. It's always going to be difficult to pick up the phone the first time, but it is worth it.
- bdamm 13y ago
  Anonymous? Oh please.
uptown 13y ago
This directory should provide a place to find someone to talk to no matter where you're located. http://suicideprevention.wikia.com/wiki/International_Suicide_Prevention_Directory http://suicideprevention.wikia.com/wiki/International_Suicid...
wavesounds 13y ago
I find it hard to believe your friend doesn't know a single person who will listen to him talk. I think more likely he is afraid to show vulnerability to people he knows. In my experience I've always become better friends with someone who has shared with me or who I have shared something personal with. Through showing vulnerability, which takes courage, we build strength. I've also been surprised at how accepting people are when you confide in them. People are much more sympathetic then we think. I'm not usually a fan of Ted talks but theres a good one on this subject, you might want to show him http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCvmsMzlF7o http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCvmsMzlF7o That being said here is the national suicide prevention hotline 1-800-273-8255 just incase its an emergency. I know people who have called before it's not a big deal they don't send out police to your house or anything like that, if anything you may have to wait on hold for a while, but the people who work there are saints
- vacri 13y ago
  You don't have to be suicidal to get someone to talk to, if you really have no-one you can approach personally. Ministers of religion are everywhere, and this is their supposed bailiwick. You don't have to be religious to talk to them. Large cities often have some kind of resources where you can see a social worker (who can refer you) or psychologist. The trick, of course, is getting over the initial reticence. Or look for things like depression hotlines - these are sometimes separate to suicide ones.
- strathmeyer 13y ago
  College didn't work out for everyone. There weren't enough jobs for all of us, now I am in my mid thirties, have no friends, and am unemployable. But you can rest assured that, yes, most people think that I shouldn't exist.
  - httpagent 13y ago
    Hello! I believe you are more valuable as a person than the contributions you make through a job. Many people find their self worth through employment, but when you get down to the nuts and bolts of it, employment generally means making money for someone else. This concept of economic slavery causes people who don't fit into the job market to feel like they're not worth their weight. Your value as a person doesn't have to be defined by your employment. If you open your mind you can find your value as a listener, a thinker, a gardener... whatever. I could use a friend as well - hit me up @gmail.
cpayne 13y ago
MKP is another support group (for men). Here's a link to the Australian chapter: http://mkpau.org/ http://mkpau.org/
mct 13y ago
You don't need to be suicidal to call the SF Suicide Prevention line. From http://www.sfsuicide.org/get-help/call-us/ http://www.sfsuicide.org/get-help/call-us/: "Trained volunteers are available 24 hours, 7 days a week to listen and help you sort things out. You do not need to be suicidal to speak with us." I don't know for sure, but I suspect other prevention lines are similar.
harshreality 13y ago
Join a group/club. Book club, sports club, some sort of tech-related local meet-up group, game club, etc. Joining an active development community for some opensource project that has primarily online interaction is not as psychologically beneficial, but might be sufficient depending on level of depression/isolation and how it affects you.
protomyth 13y ago
Its not really obvious. If you're religious, the local priest / reverend is not a bad bet. They tend to have a training and know a fair number of people. Otherwise, the suicide prevention hotline works for those moments of "I'm alone". Some of the danger for people is the thought of attracting attention from authorities that could make it all worse. The two suggestions above shouldn't have that effect.

chad_oliver 13y ago

There are quite a few hotlines which have volunteers who are willing to listen. I'm not sure if that's the sort of thing your friend is looking for, but it's certainly better than nothing.

abstractbill 13y ago

There's a YC startup for everything these days: http://www.7cupsoftea.com/ http://www.7cupsoftea.com/

deleted 13y ago
[deleted]

bazzargh 13y ago

In the UK, there's the Samaritans helpline, which is completely anonymous; the NHS also help, you can talk to your GP in confidence. I don't know exactly who to call elsewhere, but as chad_oliver says the helplines are there. http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/ http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/ lets you search for a local support group in the USA. It's always going to be difficult to pick up the phone the first time, but it is worth it.

bdamm 13y ago
Anonymous? Oh please.

uptown 13y ago

This directory should provide a place to find someone to talk to no matter where you're located. http://suicideprevention.wikia.com/wiki/International_Suicide_Prevention_Directory http://suicideprevention.wikia.com/wiki/International_Suicid...

wavesounds 13y ago

I find it hard to believe your friend doesn't know a single person who will listen to him talk. I think more likely he is afraid to show vulnerability to people he knows. In my experience I've always become better friends with someone who has shared with me or who I have shared something personal with. Through showing vulnerability, which takes courage, we build strength. I've also been surprised at how accepting people are when you confide in them. People are much more sympathetic then we think. I'm not usually a fan of Ted talks but theres a good one on this subject, you might want to show him http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCvmsMzlF7o http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCvmsMzlF7o That being said here is the national suicide prevention hotline 1-800-273-8255 just incase its an emergency. I know people who have called before it's not a big deal they don't send out police to your house or anything like that, if anything you may have to wait on hold for a while, but the people who work there are saints

vacri 13y ago
You don't have to be suicidal to get someone to talk to, if you really have no-one you can approach personally. Ministers of religion are everywhere, and this is their supposed bailiwick. You don't have to be religious to talk to them. Large cities often have some kind of resources where you can see a social worker (who can refer you) or psychologist. The trick, of course, is getting over the initial reticence. Or look for things like depression hotlines - these are sometimes separate to suicide ones.
strathmeyer 13y ago
College didn't work out for everyone. There weren't enough jobs for all of us, now I am in my mid thirties, have no friends, and am unemployable. But you can rest assured that, yes, most people think that I shouldn't exist.
- httpagent 13y ago
  Hello! I believe you are more valuable as a person than the contributions you make through a job. Many people find their self worth through employment, but when you get down to the nuts and bolts of it, employment generally means making money for someone else. This concept of economic slavery causes people who don't fit into the job market to feel like they're not worth their weight. Your value as a person doesn't have to be defined by your employment. If you open your mind you can find your value as a listener, a thinker, a gardener... whatever. I could use a friend as well - hit me up @gmail.

cpayne 13y ago

MKP is another support group (for men). Here's a link to the Australian chapter: http://mkpau.org/ http://mkpau.org/

mct 13y ago

You don't need to be suicidal to call the SF Suicide Prevention line. From http://www.sfsuicide.org/get-help/call-us/ http://www.sfsuicide.org/get-help/call-us/: "Trained volunteers are available 24 hours, 7 days a week to listen and help you sort things out. You do not need to be suicidal to speak with us." I don't know for sure, but I suspect other prevention lines are similar.

harshreality 13y ago

Join a group/club. Book club, sports club, some sort of tech-related local meet-up group, game club, etc. Joining an active development community for some opensource project that has primarily online interaction is not as psychologically beneficial, but might be sufficient depending on level of depression/isolation and how it affects you.

protomyth 13y ago

Its not really obvious. If you're religious, the local priest / reverend is not a bad bet. They tend to have a training and know a fair number of people. Otherwise, the suicide prevention hotline works for those moments of "I'm alone". Some of the danger for people is the thought of attracting attention from authorities that could make it all worse. The two suggestions above shouldn't have that effect.