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Thanks for your reply. I don't have the time to answer your post in detail, so I give some brief thoughts. I don't know how big your city is but maybe you shou

by apunic 13y ago

Thanks for your reply. I don't have the time to answer your post in detail, so I give some brief thoughts. I don't know how big your city is but maybe you should consider to relocate. Capitals are usually the way to go, most people, open minds. Also some countries/mentalities are more open and some not, so maybe you should change the country, too. Don't get me wrong but your post sounds pretty negative, I agree that getting out of loneliness is hard but it's not impossible. And believe me there is some life-changing pua literature out there which is very sophisticated and rather about deep psychological concepts. So, don't judge them before reading them yourself. > it also depends on the cultural environment and the particular circumstances Then, why don't you change them?

dalai 13y ago
> I agree that getting out of loneliness is hard but it's not impossible. I don't disagree there. My point (which I probably didn't really make) was that you can't have a recipe for it. Too much depends on the particularities of the person and their situation. > I don't know how big your city is I live in Munich, which for Germany is big and quite international. > Don't get me wrong but your post sounds pretty negative Maybe I focused too much on the bad stuff. I do have some friends, I do have the opportunity to go out from time to time. It is just that these relationships are superficial and not as fulfilling. Curiously, others do not seem to mind at all. > Then, why don't you change them? I am actually in the process of doing that even though, professionally, it is probably a bad move. I've been applying to different places and positions for some time now, unfortunately I haven't had much luck so far due to various reasons.
- apunic 13y ago
  Munich is neither bad nor small but still I can imagine that finding friends there is hard: in Munich you find those networks and circles which exist for decades and over generations. The people are nice but the fluctuation is too small, the city is not dynamic, night-life is quite limited, you would need 10 years to get into the society and still some parts would not welcome you. => change quickly to a real capital
  - sasvari 13y ago
    Munich is neither bad nor small but still I can imagine that finding friends there is hard: in Munich you find those networks and circles which exist for decades and over generations. The people are nice but the fluctuation is too small Compared to the US, you find decades old networks and circles nearly in every part/city of Europe (at least in Germany). This is just a result of a quite immobile society until recently. In Munich, fluctuation among young professionals (20-40) is actually pretty high, or at least higher as you describe: Munich is one of Germany's economic powerhouses with lots of German graduates and professionals from the rest of Europe moving to. the city is not dynamic, night-life is quite limited, you would need 10 years to get into the society and still some parts would not welcome you. I don't really know what you want to imply here: how do you define dynamic? And what should it mean in this context? Munich might not be as dynamic as London/NYC/SF/Berlin/whatever, but calling it not dynamic doesn't do it justice. The rest of your statement is also very prejudiced: it does not take you 10 years to get into the society, and that some parts of every society are not open to foreigners is neither unique to Munich, nor to Germany or Europe. Regarding Munich night-life: it is definitely not comparable to Berlin night-life, but still it is quite vibrant. There are two of Germany's biggest universities in Munich, and roughly >110k students in the city. In summer time the whole city is out drinking/eating in one of the millions of beer gardens where it is quite common to sit with total strangers at the same table. => change quickly to a real capital Depending on your field, Munich sometimes is THE place to go/work in Germany: i.e. you won't find a lot of engineering positions in Berlin, but lots of in Munich (or generally speaking in southern Germany; but then Munich most probably is the most open/international city there).
chrizel 13y ago
> And believe me there is some life-changing pua literature out there which is very sophisticated and rather about deep psychological concepts. Thanks for your post. Do you have any recommendations for good pua literature?
- apunic 13y ago
  There's tons of good stuff out there and what I still remember are the posts from Tyler (RSD), they changed me and his works are way beyond pick-up lines, check his material and his peer group and you find many more talented guys. I'd even consider to book one of those seminars, they are incredibly expensive and look like scam (they are not) but they perfectly brainwash you, reframe your mind and this is what most need. Most concepts are so contrary to what you have been socialized with, so you desperately need this stuff to get on the right track. And more important, it's extremely motivating and eye-opening -- going through that material is like finding the error after days of debugging. Before I got into PUA 10 years ago I did really everything wrong.

by apunic 13y ago

dalai 13y ago

> I agree that getting out of loneliness is hard but it's not impossible. I don't disagree there. My point (which I probably didn't really make) was that you can't have a recipe for it. Too much depends on the particularities of the person and their situation. > I don't know how big your city is I live in Munich, which for Germany is big and quite international. > Don't get me wrong but your post sounds pretty negative Maybe I focused too much on the bad stuff. I do have some friends, I do have the opportunity to go out from time to time. It is just that these relationships are superficial and not as fulfilling. Curiously, others do not seem to mind at all. > Then, why don't you change them? I am actually in the process of doing that even though, professionally, it is probably a bad move. I've been applying to different places and positions for some time now, unfortunately I haven't had much luck so far due to various reasons.

apunic 13y ago
Munich is neither bad nor small but still I can imagine that finding friends there is hard: in Munich you find those networks and circles which exist for decades and over generations. The people are nice but the fluctuation is too small, the city is not dynamic, night-life is quite limited, you would need 10 years to get into the society and still some parts would not welcome you. => change quickly to a real capital
- sasvari 13y ago
  Munich is neither bad nor small but still I can imagine that finding friends there is hard: in Munich you find those networks and circles which exist for decades and over generations. The people are nice but the fluctuation is too small Compared to the US, you find decades old networks and circles nearly in every part/city of Europe (at least in Germany). This is just a result of a quite immobile society until recently. In Munich, fluctuation among young professionals (20-40) is actually pretty high, or at least higher as you describe: Munich is one of Germany's economic powerhouses with lots of German graduates and professionals from the rest of Europe moving to. the city is not dynamic, night-life is quite limited, you would need 10 years to get into the society and still some parts would not welcome you. I don't really know what you want to imply here: how do you define dynamic? And what should it mean in this context? Munich might not be as dynamic as London/NYC/SF/Berlin/whatever, but calling it not dynamic doesn't do it justice. The rest of your statement is also very prejudiced: it does not take you 10 years to get into the society, and that some parts of every society are not open to foreigners is neither unique to Munich, nor to Germany or Europe. Regarding Munich night-life: it is definitely not comparable to Berlin night-life, but still it is quite vibrant. There are two of Germany's biggest universities in Munich, and roughly >110k students in the city. In summer time the whole city is out drinking/eating in one of the millions of beer gardens where it is quite common to sit with total strangers at the same table. => change quickly to a real capital Depending on your field, Munich sometimes is THE place to go/work in Germany: i.e. you won't find a lot of engineering positions in Berlin, but lots of in Munich (or generally speaking in southern Germany; but then Munich most probably is the most open/international city there).

chrizel 13y ago

> And believe me there is some life-changing pua literature out there which is very sophisticated and rather about deep psychological concepts. Thanks for your post. Do you have any recommendations for good pua literature?

apunic 13y ago
There's tons of good stuff out there and what I still remember are the posts from Tyler (RSD), they changed me and his works are way beyond pick-up lines, check his material and his peer group and you find many more talented guys. I'd even consider to book one of those seminars, they are incredibly expensive and look like scam (they are not) but they perfectly brainwash you, reframe your mind and this is what most need. Most concepts are so contrary to what you have been socialized with, so you desperately need this stuff to get on the right track. And more important, it's extremely motivating and eye-opening -- going through that material is like finding the error after days of debugging. Before I got into PUA 10 years ago I did really everything wrong.