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Awareness means more than knowing something can happen. It means having ways to address it. It is not the victim's responsibility to "stand up to" a bully. It

Awareness means more than knowing something can happen. It means having ways to address it. It is not the victim's responsibility to "stand up to" a bully. It is the responsibility of the power structure to prevent bullying as much as it can, and take seriously and address bullying when it happens; avoiding this responsibility doesn't help anyone but bullies. It is actually this abdication of responsibility that causes a power structure to enable rather than prevent bullying, because it results in few or no consequences for the bully and no improvement in environment for the victim.

whistlerbrk 13y ago
So, I don't believe that any power structure can so easily address the bullying issue without delving into grey areas. You need only look at the legal system which does delve into grey areas of inter-personal conflict for an example. So the alternatives from a system wide level are don't address it all or be very strict. We went to latter extreme with "zero tolerance" policies, which have failed. Not addressing it all is also bad, because as others have pointed out, we don't live in a fairy tale land where turning around and hitting the bully always works. So then what's the choice? Don't structure it. Give the power to the adult in the room, the teacher, to mediate. They are the people with the best information and closest to the situation. They know their kids. Great teachers, great camp counselors, all do the same thing - 'are you guys okay, or am I going to have to tell the principal about this?'. They play that incredibly delicate role of, do you want to deal with each other and me, or the big bad unknown of the administrator down the hall? Having that level in between means they maintain the confidence of their charges and the power to elevate as well. Unfortunately, teachers today, have been stripped of their ability to act in this capacity. Now, we could very well be talking about the same thing, since the teacher in this example could be said to be part of the power structure. My point of course is, we can't have a rule book when dealing with these matters, only a guidebook. Fair?

whistlerbrk 13y ago

So, I don't believe that any power structure can so easily address the bullying issue without delving into grey areas. You need only look at the legal system which does delve into grey areas of inter-personal conflict for an example. So the alternatives from a system wide level are don't address it all or be very strict. We went to latter extreme with "zero tolerance" policies, which have failed. Not addressing it all is also bad, because as others have pointed out, we don't live in a fairy tale land where turning around and hitting the bully always works. So then what's the choice? Don't structure it. Give the power to the adult in the room, the teacher, to mediate. They are the people with the best information and closest to the situation. They know their kids. Great teachers, great camp counselors, all do the same thing - 'are you guys okay, or am I going to have to tell the principal about this?'. They play that incredibly delicate role of, do you want to deal with each other and me, or the big bad unknown of the administrator down the hall? Having that level in between means they maintain the confidence of their charges and the power to elevate as well. Unfortunately, teachers today, have been stripped of their ability to act in this capacity. Now, we could very well be talking about the same thing, since the teacher in this example could be said to be part of the power structure. My point of course is, we can't have a rule book when dealing with these matters, only a guidebook. Fair?