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I think you read the wrong message about why his marriage ended. Rather than separating over the lack of paycheck, he and his ex-wife chose to forgo his payche
by overgryphon 13y ago
I think you read the wrong message about why his marriage ended.
Rather than separating over the lack of paycheck, he and his ex-wife chose to forgo his paycheck initially because the demands of his high-stress job did not leave room for his role as a husband and father. He did not work for two years by choice in order to be with his family.
When he wasn't able to go back, they continued on together as a family through foreclosure, living in a two-bedroom apartment as a family with 8 children. He didn't earn a paycheck for six years before they separated. It sounds like they continued on together until they were simply unable to pay for housing.
She took the younger children to Germany, where as citizens they had a good education system and social safety net to rely on, and he stayed in the States and kept in contact with the teenage kids so they could remain in the same high school.
These decisions do not reflect a spouse that simply does not care how many ball games her husband attended. They describe a team who consistently prioritized their children's stability and education over a paycheck or even their marriage.
- nhangen 13y agoExcept that she let him remain homeless and fell in love with another man.
- ludston 13y agoWhy is that not ok?
- ivanca 13y agoSeriously? "I provided for you and our 8 kids for 15 years but it's pretty much OK if you just want to go to live in Germany to sleep with another dude and leave me here to die alone by hunger just because now I'm hitting rock bottom economically" Is not about love, is about being a fucking decent human being.
- overgryphon 13y agoShe moved to Germany to provide housing, health care, and education for their younger children. Divorce came later.
- xacaxulu 13y agoFunny how 'love' can be spelled 'financial security'.
- brazzy 13y agoThey separated two years after they lost the house. She went to Germany since she had German citizenship (he didn't). She was still taking care of several small children. How exactly do you propose she could have not "let" him remain homeless? The falling in love with another man happened some years later still. I find it apalling how ready people in this comment subtree are to villify a woman based on their ignorant misjudgement of the situation.
- nhangen 13y agoI find it appalling how quickly you turn to words like 'ignorant' and 'vilify' when all I've done is point out the obvious.
- adrianmsmith 13y ago"She went to Germany since she had German citizenship (he didn't)." They were married and had been for a long time (i.e. demonstrably not a "sham marriage"). The husband would have got a permanent residency and work visa in Germany.
- kamaal 13y ago>>because the demands of his high-stress job did not leave room for his role as a husband and father. This guy was in a no win situation here. He was working 17 hours a day to provide for the family. And their expectation was that he could just provide, provide and provide. After they had enough of the money, they wanted his time. But after some time, they needed the money again. It more or less seems like this guy was treated like a money making machine who exists only to serve their purpose. When he hit a bottom he was just abandoned. The wife went on some where and with someone who could provide further. The children felt its not their obligation to take of the father. While they expected it was father's obligation to care of them. Ultimately this feels like classic 'Use and throw' attitude. He was used, and when he was no longer useful he was thrown. Frankly speaking if I were him, I would no longer want to keep any contact with that kind of people again. Its likely if this guy gets rich again. His wife will suddenly discover love for him again. Children will suddenly find compassion for their father. Its just all about the money.
- brazzy 13y agoHow about you try how much work taking care of EIGHT children is before you slader that woman, asshole? Also, read the damn article, fully.
- girvo 13y agoYou can express your opinion without stooping to crude insults. In fact, people listen to you better when you do, in my experience.
- Unosolo 13y agoThis. He had likely abandoned his well-paying job because of burn-out caused by the long hours and lack of appreciation at home where he was treated as an ATM. I am talking from personal experience and many stories of my peers. In the modern Western society many men are isolated and do not talk to each other about their family problems. If they did they'd found out how similar their stories are - overworked, unappreciated by their wives with their kids brought up to despise them, quietly carrying the entire financial burden of the family on their backs. Whilst the author had to pick up the pieces of spending gone out of control his entire "family" moved on. As soon as he became a liability instead of an asset his wife discarded him.