That's precisely right, though it was more of a "I know Doug pays the rent for all, then we cut him checks, I'm going to make sure I'm not around the apartment

That's precisely right, though it was more of a "I know Doug pays the rent for all, then we cut him checks, I'm going to make sure I'm not around the apartment for a few days until I get a paycheck" sort of thing :\ I spent many years having a very difficult time admitting when I needed help and asking for it, instead I would duck and dodge and keep spinning the plates as fast as I could to keep things together.