3 ms·

> I remember I was helping out a friend with a side project after work one day. We sat down and spent the night writing code together. It was just so...easy. To

by Dewie 13y ago

> I remember I was helping out a friend with a side project after work one day. We sat down and spent the night writing code together. It was just so...easy. To get along, to get on the same page, our arguments were productive and from the minute we sat down together there was an immediate sense that we respected each other. She get's along better with a person that has more in common with her. The outcome of this is kind of ironic, if you think that the purpose of these initiatives is 'diversity'.

ufmace 13y ago
That's the part that I found a little funny too. Sure, it's a lot more pleasant to work closely with somebody you get along well with, but I don't really see what gender has to do with that. I guess she doesn't get along with the men she works with all that well, but being a guy myself, I don't necessarily enjoy working closely with every guy I've worked with just because we're both men. If there were 50 women developers at her company, would she enjoy working with every one of them? Or if there are 50 men and she doesn't enjoy working with any of them, then that's a little odd too.
- scott_s 13y ago
  She probably gets along great with her male colleagues. But if she is straight (I don't know if she is), and she was with a straight, male colleague after work, and spent "the night writing code together", there would probably be at least some romantic tension. At work, it's possible to have none, because everyone is a professional and we all understand the boundaries. But once you're electing to spend time with a person outside of work hours, then it can become ambiguous, and one party may feel compelled to say "By the way, this isn't a date...". If she is straight, and she is spending time with a straight female colleague, then that tension is not present at all. When you're a straight guy, working almost exclusively with straight guys, then this doesn't have to enter your thinking.
  - Dewie 13y ago
    This is real life we're talking about, not a romantic comedy.
    - scott_s 13y ago
      I don't see how what I described has anything to do with a romantic comedy. I think it's completely reasonable that women may not feel immediately comfortable spending after-work time with male colleagues. But, with a fellow female colleague, there is no ambiguity.
      - Dewie 13y ago
        > I think it's completely reasonable that women may not feel immediately comfortable spending after-work time with male colleagues. Yes, that might be the case for a lot of women. In Saudi Arabia.

by Dewie 13y ago

ufmace 13y ago

That's the part that I found a little funny too. Sure, it's a lot more pleasant to work closely with somebody you get along well with, but I don't really see what gender has to do with that. I guess she doesn't get along with the men she works with all that well, but being a guy myself, I don't necessarily enjoy working closely with every guy I've worked with just because we're both men. If there were 50 women developers at her company, would she enjoy working with every one of them? Or if there are 50 men and she doesn't enjoy working with any of them, then that's a little odd too.

scott_s 13y ago
She probably gets along great with her male colleagues. But if she is straight (I don't know if she is), and she was with a straight, male colleague after work, and spent "the night writing code together", there would probably be at least some romantic tension. At work, it's possible to have none, because everyone is a professional and we all understand the boundaries. But once you're electing to spend time with a person outside of work hours, then it can become ambiguous, and one party may feel compelled to say "By the way, this isn't a date...". If she is straight, and she is spending time with a straight female colleague, then that tension is not present at all. When you're a straight guy, working almost exclusively with straight guys, then this doesn't have to enter your thinking.
- Dewie 13y ago
  This is real life we're talking about, not a romantic comedy.
  - scott_s 13y ago
    I don't see how what I described has anything to do with a romantic comedy. I think it's completely reasonable that women may not feel immediately comfortable spending after-work time with male colleagues. But, with a fellow female colleague, there is no ambiguity.
    - Dewie 13y ago
      > I think it's completely reasonable that women may not feel immediately comfortable spending after-work time with male colleagues. Yes, that might be the case for a lot of women. In Saudi Arabia.