7 ms·
I think the long commute tip is accurate overall, however can be mitigated. Before going back to grad school, my job required a long commute (easily 60 minutes
by therobot24 13y ago
I think the long commute tip is accurate overall, however can be mitigated. Before going back to grad school, my job required a long commute (easily 60 minutes each way). Getting up early bothered me, but the drive to work was fine as local radio morning shows were pretty good (though over the course of only 4 years of this commute, schedules changed removing 3 nationally syndicated shows, and 2 local shows before just setting on NPR...FM radio seems to be a cruel world). However, driving home was the worst...just the worst, even when listening to music off of my mp3 player, if i was running late to leave by even a few minutes the commute home could take an extra 15. I was much more stressed at the end of each day just from driving, and by the time i made and ate dinner i'd only really have ~2 hours to relax before having to go to bed to get up and start again. The unhappiness timeline:
- Stress turned into a general depression that my weekdays were robotic (sleep, wake, drive, work, drive, eat, sleep)
- I found myself becoming a more aggressive driver (more stress = wanting to get home faster)
- My general attitude was changing for the worse
- I started to alienate my significant other
A friend suggested i read a book for some reason and i picked up the audio copy to kill some time on the drive home. This turned out to be a life changer. Instead of focusing on getting home as soon as i could, i was relaxing on my drive. Happiness timeline:
- I found myself sitting in my driveway to hear the end of a chapter
- Getting home didn't mean i needed to retreat to the study for time to unwind
- I started driving slower and less aggressive (even letting people cut me off, etc)
- My relationship with my SO improved
- I felt smarter. My usual reading list is text book chapters to better understand a concept, but i really felt like i was a generally smarter person by including non-fiction.
- Most important is that i didn't feel like i was wasting time. Driving became a hobby in some sense, as opposed to a delay of when i can start/end my day.
By the end of my tenure i sometimes looked forward to my commute, only so i could keep listening. Of course audio books may not be your game, but the thesis is that if you find some way to make you feel like you're not wasting your time then you'll most likely not mind the commute (for example, my mom calls her mother, my grandmother, everyday on the commute home).
- mahyarm 13y agoI agree that good podcasts and audiobooks can make long car travel far more enjoyable.
- fossuser 13y agoI'm not sure no commute is always better. Living in palo alto as a guy in your early twenties is pretty miserable - even if you can walk 10 minutes to work.
- ramblerman 13y agoWell of course. Just because the presence of something can cause unhappiness why would you assume the absence of it causes happiness?
- cylinder 13y agoI came here to take on the commuting point. Every time I read about how miserable long commutes are, I think of my dad. 45 minutes driving through traffic each way every day. Never hear him complain about it or get in a sour mood over it. He enjoys it. It's all about attitude and making the best of your time. In traffic? Release your anger, it wont' get anywhere. Put on NPR (or whatever you like), take a refreshing tea or juice with you, don't rage at moronic drivers, etc. Happiness is about attitude, especially your attitude towards stress. Nothing you can do will eliminate stress in your life. You may shorten your commute, but some other stressor will appear... smaller living quarters, more crime/noise in the city, etc.
- richforrester 13y agoExactly. To me it's a little alone time, time to think. Think about life, relationships, personal projects... a bit of day-dreaming. I do use public transportation.
- riffraff 13y agofunny, I was thinking of the opposite. I commuted by train for many years (45-60 mins) and while I enjoyed the time alone (mostly reading) I loved more the trips when I met with people. Start the morning commuting with your best friend, work or study all day, meet a schoolmate you hadn't seen in a while on the way back. I don't miss the overcrowded train, but I miss the people on it.
- richforrester 13y agoOut of interest; Myers Briggs - are you an I or and E?
- riffraff 13y agoI never took the real test, but according to random online tests in the same style, I get discordant results. Personally, I would think I.
- 13y ago
- svmegatron 13y agoIf you like singing, your commute is an awesome time to practice. Make a mix of some challenging/fun sing-along songs and just go for it. And like so many things, if you sing for an hour a day (30 minutes each way!) you will get a LOT better at it.
- warfangle 13y agoJust, please not on public transportation!
- svmegatron 13y agoHa! OK, I promise.
- gadders 13y agoThere was a guy at London Bridge Station last week singing show tunes at the top of his voice. Not sure if it was an undercover camera show or a mental health issue.
- spupy 13y agoThe other people in the tram car weren't so enthusiastic about my singing. :(
- Steve44 13y agoI recently started downloading podcasts from BBC Radio 4, They have some really great programmes on science, finance, politics and comedy. I just work my way through those once in a while, much better than music.
- jbrooksuk 13y agoWas it a specific book that focused on this kind of thing, or was it any old book?
- therobot24 13y agowell the first book i tried was "how to argue and win every time" by gerry spence...not a particularly great book, but once i finished it, i moved to classics like lord of the rings, the great gatsby, 20000 leagues under the sea, etc. One suggestion is that even though librivox is free, the quality of audio book has a really high variance - unless you have the time to sort through the ones (cause sometimes there is just that one person you can't stand to listen to), just get them from your library
- gadders 13y agoIt depends what your commute consists of. 1 hour of driving = hard work 1 hour on a comfortable train where you get a seat = much easier
- chucknelson 13y agoPodcasts have had the same effect for me with driving as well as chores like dishes, taking out the trash, etc. My only fear is I'm developing some sort of dependence on audio (specifically talk show type audio) to get anything done!
- Tichy 13y agoThe time lost to commuting is also time where you don't meet other people, and don't exercise. Things like that also factor into the result, and you might not even be aware that you are missing out. Although to be fair, most people I know don't meet a lot of people most of the time anyway. Modern work life seems to be work - TV all week long.