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I am not sure if this is ok to post - I checked the guidelines but found nothing against this. If there is some kind of policy against for feedback like this, I

I am not sure if this is ok to post - I checked the guidelines but found nothing against this. If there is some kind of policy against for feedback like this, I will delete my post. This is definitely not meant to be some kind of ad, just an honest wish for feedback on my conceptual idea. I hope that's ok? I am new to HN, but Paul Graham had dating on his "ideas" list for startups he would like to fund, so I thought HN might be a good place to discuss it.

deleted 17y ago
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anigbrowl 17y ago
No, it's cool - good article in fact, although I'm not sure I see a clear path to monetization in there. After all, one could do a facebook addon called 'you'd be perfect (for each other)' and let people play matchmaker for fun. On the dating-as-sales-generator, Mrs Browl keeps telling me to set up 'forgetfulguy.com' so you can put info about your significant other and it will remind you to buy flowers and so forth. Maybe she's trying to tell me something...
russell 17y ago
I personally think that a blog post as an extended Ask HN is a reasonable way to go. I've considered it myself. This is a fine line. I can see self-posting as the way to spam, especially for opinion pieces. People who regularly blog shouldn't self-post. That said, I think yours falls within the spirit of Ask HN. Others considering doing so should contribute more before such a post to get a feel for what works an what doesn't.
- ErrantX 17y ago
  > People who regularly blog shouldn't self-post. I think a better rough policy there is people who regularly blog shouldnt self-post every story :D One reason I like HN is the community doesnt seem to care much about shameless self promotion or casual self posting so long as it is interesting :D
TrevorJ 17y ago
Yeah, seems like a good submission. A couple thoughts: People do pay to get into a certain building to meet other single people (I'm thinking about nightclubs and bars that have cover charges here). Also, your point about people mostly meeting partners through friends is valid but the REAL question is does it happen this way becasue that's the 'best' way to meet somebody or becasue it's currently one of the biggest ways humans meet new people? In other words, does it work this way becasue this way works best, or does it work this way because it just happens to provide the most chances? That being said, your assessment of the problem is solid. It's an idea worth honing in on. The one thing you'd want to be able to hang onto from the "walled garden" sites is the fact that everyone there has expressed interest and availability for a dating relationship. This lowers the risk for those who do the asking since you are less likely to get rebuffed in the "EW, I'm dating already, thank you very much creepo!" sort of way.
- dsplittgerber 17y ago
  Thanks for your feedback! Great point about the most efficient way to meet a partner! This is indeed a great question one should ask oneself. I see a problem with that approach though: I guess many people don't want to mix 'efficiency' with dating and human interactions and emotions too much. It's probably socially accepted to use dating sites, but are we already on our way to rethink our entire approach to dating? The expression of interest is indeed a good concept to hang on to. Which is why social networks are especially suitable for adding dating - you can add a simple "are you open to dating approaches?"-setting.
  - heed 17y ago
    Like TrevorJ said, meeting people through a circle of friends may not be the best method for landing a date, but it could help to relieve the lingering stigmas of online dating. I know many people that still frown upon and feel uneasy about digital hookups. It might be useful to investigate ways of reaching these people. Maybe like a dating site in disguise?
    - dave_au 17y ago

deleted 17y ago

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anigbrowl 17y ago

No, it's cool - good article in fact, although I'm not sure I see a clear path to monetization in there. After all, one could do a facebook addon called 'you'd be perfect (for each other)' and let people play matchmaker for fun. On the dating-as-sales-generator, Mrs Browl keeps telling me to set up 'forgetfulguy.com' so you can put info about your significant other and it will remind you to buy flowers and so forth. Maybe she's trying to tell me something...

russell 17y ago

I personally think that a blog post as an extended Ask HN is a reasonable way to go. I've considered it myself. This is a fine line. I can see self-posting as the way to spam, especially for opinion pieces. People who regularly blog shouldn't self-post. That said, I think yours falls within the spirit of Ask HN. Others considering doing so should contribute more before such a post to get a feel for what works an what doesn't.

ErrantX 17y ago
> People who regularly blog shouldn't self-post. I think a better rough policy there is people who regularly blog shouldnt self-post every story :D One reason I like HN is the community doesnt seem to care much about shameless self promotion or casual self posting so long as it is interesting :D

TrevorJ 17y ago

Yeah, seems like a good submission. A couple thoughts: People do pay to get into a certain building to meet other single people (I'm thinking about nightclubs and bars that have cover charges here). Also, your point about people mostly meeting partners through friends is valid but the REAL question is does it happen this way becasue that's the 'best' way to meet somebody or becasue it's currently one of the biggest ways humans meet new people? In other words, does it work this way becasue this way works best, or does it work this way because it just happens to provide the most chances? That being said, your assessment of the problem is solid. It's an idea worth honing in on. The one thing you'd want to be able to hang onto from the "walled garden" sites is the fact that everyone there has expressed interest and availability for a dating relationship. This lowers the risk for those who do the asking since you are less likely to get rebuffed in the "EW, I'm dating already, thank you very much creepo!" sort of way.

dsplittgerber 17y ago
Thanks for your feedback! Great point about the most efficient way to meet a partner! This is indeed a great question one should ask oneself. I see a problem with that approach though: I guess many people don't want to mix 'efficiency' with dating and human interactions and emotions too much. It's probably socially accepted to use dating sites, but are we already on our way to rethink our entire approach to dating? The expression of interest is indeed a good concept to hang on to. Which is why social networks are especially suitable for adding dating - you can add a simple "are you open to dating approaches?"-setting.
- heed 17y ago
  Like TrevorJ said, meeting people through a circle of friends may not be the best method for landing a date, but it could help to relieve the lingering stigmas of online dating. I know many people that still frown upon and feel uneasy about digital hookups. It might be useful to investigate ways of reaching these people. Maybe like a dating site in disguise?
  - dave_au 17y ago