11 ms·

Just one of those observations: A while ago, could be 3 or so years, I was in my local fish and chip shop. For those who don't know, there are small take away

by alan_cx 13y ago

Just one of those observations: A while ago, could be 3 or so years, I was in my local fish and chip shop. For those who don't know, there are small take away food shops in the UK (and I guess else where) and generally you wander up, order your food, then usually wait a few minutes while your order is put together or cooked. 10 mins or so. (I like the wait because usually it means my food is being cooked fresh.) Usually I stand to the side waiting, and just gaze around, usually at the world going by out side the window. Normally the customers are not just one off people, but a couples or a pair of friends, or a parent and kids, and so on. You know, a decent variety of however people come. Usually there is a bit of a buzz of conversation and what not. This time, I looked up, and all 10 or so of the people waiting in the show were literally buried, absorbed in their smart phones, and the shop stood stark silence. The people on their own, the kids, the parents, the couples, the whole damn lot. The only sounds were of the people working in the shop preparing the food. Usually when the food is cooked, the person behind the counter only needs to mention the beginning of the order and the right person usually snaps in to action to retrieved their food, and leave the shop. This time I noticed it took up to 3 or 4 attempts before the smart phone spell was broken and the person realized their food was ready. And the weirdest thing was, as they came to, coming out of their smart phone spell, each and every one of them had that look of some one who had just woken up in the morning. Eyes blinking, rubbing eyes, the slow realization of where you are, what you are doing, what comes next, etc. I found the whole thing incredible creepy. And since then, I've seen it more and more. In fact, I have even been round people houses or in a pub, where there are a few people meeting up, and I've observed the exact same thing. Oh, add to that, railway stations, bus stops, and so on. OK, smart phones are very, very useful. Great little devices. But Im not so sure about they way people use them. Seems to me there must be something socially damaging about over use. Its like having the kid who is (exaggerate to show the point time) 24/7 in his/her bedroom on their computer. Now its like that but we can take the computer everywhere. Yeah, we can isolate ourselves anywhere.

hfsktr 13y ago
"And the weirdest thing was, as they came to, coming out of their smart phone spell, each and every one of them had that look of some one who had just woken up in the morning. Eyes blinking, rubbing eyes, the slow realization of where you are, what you are doing, what comes next, etc." I bet the same would happen if they had a book or magazine and were reading or even just staring off into space and daydreaming or watching TV. Change of context.
jkscm 13y ago
The dosage makes the poison. So yes, overuse is not healthy. But consider another angle: for me a smartphone can fill useless time like waiting for an appointment, the bus, etc. instead of wasting their time these people text their loved ones, read articles about self employment or check reddit for cat pictures. Giving someone not the attention they might deserve is indeed rude. But i hope customs will change hopefully to the better and people put their smartphones down when appropriate. But i don't think it is right other without knowing the context and what they're doing. Edit: I think i want a better mute button for my phone and a hardware mute button for my laptop. Everything should be hidden besides calls from circa 5 people and the third call from one number. Besides that the OS should not show me any notification, message,etc. not even the notification light should blink and when i check the time on the phone i should not see how many messages i missed
- digitalsushi 13y ago
  Try eating dinner with a group of current college kids and hoping they put their phones down to listen to you. There is no way the trend is going to reverse itself. I try not to be a cynic but on this topic it's impossible for me - what event could trigger a reversal to this behavior? What would make people prefer people again over digital distractions?
  - mhurron 13y ago
    > what event could trigger a reversal to this behavior? The collapse of society and all of its support. Basically, you'll have to make them useless.
  - protonfish 13y ago
    Most teenagers are self-absorbed little snots so I don't think blaming the phone is fair. This is not a "trend." Smartphones are still a very new technology and there is a gap between the changes they have made in our lives and the development of proper etiquette.
  - mhb 13y ago
    Maybe we are just experiencing a transitional (decades?) phase en route to living entirely in the virtual realm. Do people in Second Life walk around looking at their phones?
weland 13y ago
This is part of the reason why I obnoxiously refuse to get a smartphone. My phone is still the cheapest Nokia phone I could get. The social behaviour they generate is interesting on every front. For instance, there's this shopping mall close to the center of the city where I live. On the last floor, there are a bunch of restaurants, a small tobacco shop and the toilets. I go there fairly often, either for the tobacco or to hit the toilet. Every restaurant has incredibly pushy promoters; the moment you set foot on that floor, these people immediately start handing you flyers, telling you about their restaurant, following you a couple of steps. I do my best to be polite with them; I know they're working on next to no payment, for imbecile bosses who think this is a good sales technique, so I'm never rude with them or anything. I just smile and say "Yeah, maybe some other time". Sometimes, however, I'm just not in the mood for that. Long days, my own retarded boss, the incredible urge to go to the toilet (for some reason, there's no toilet around the place...), my hurry to get home and, until about a year ago, a lingering depression, simply mean I'm sometimes not up even to the little human interaction I need in order to politely refuse them. So I just pop up my phone and pretend I'm reading a message or dialing a number. Suddenly, everyone's OK. No one would even dare disturb me. If I pretend I'm talking on the phone, the pushier ones will apologize for disturbing me, but will otherwise eagerly present me their offering. But if I have my eyes buried in it, it's like I'm suddenly invisible. One time, I even had to wait there for one of my friends to arrive, and stood there for at least five or ten minutes. No one even approached me as long as I kept my eyes down. I put the phone in my pocket for like five seconds because I thought I'd lost my wallet -- poof, two chicks appear to invite me to the marvelous restaurant that just opened and has a special offer just for me.
- AznHisoka 13y ago
  I think I would excuse this behavior in large cities, or when you feel overexposed to stimulation. I mean, it DOES take a ton of effort to be attentive to every single human that you encounter, whether it's in an mundane setting like a subway/shopping mall, or at work. Especially if you live in a huge city like SF, or NYC. If you don't distract yourself once in awhile, by immersing yourself with something like a smartphone, I imagine it's very easy to get drained out with so much stimulation. I mean, if we lived in the caveman age, or even the medieval ages where we encountered the same 20 or so people every single day, then yes, there's no need for the smartphone, but in the modern day, I think it's almost necessary to survive mentally. I look at it this way: Humans were not meant to live in highly populated areas where they interact with a thousand strangers every single day.
Anonymous9823 13y ago
I was traveling on the metro in Korea late one night. There were maybe 20 people in the train car, and literally every single one was staring down at their smart phone. I had to laugh, there wasn't a single exception and not a word spoken, as new people got on, sat down, and pulled out their phone. This went on for 10 or 20 minutes, then finally someone made a noise. It was a women pointing to her screen to share something with a friend next to her. Then they both went back to their separate phones and the mobile train continued forward. This was the first time I noticed everyone on their phone, and I felt like I was in the twilight zone. There would be groups of three or four friends sitting in a line, not speaking a single word. Eerie.
- ijk 13y ago
  Given that metros and elevators are the kind of public private spaces where the social norm is to ignore the people around you as much as possible (at least, in most mass transit cultures I'm familiar with) this long predates the smart phone and the cell phone.
  - kyllo 13y ago
    When I lived in Seoul in 2008-2010, people were not only using smartphones, they were watching television on their smartphones, in the subway. Smartphones in Korea have built-in TV tuners. And yes, the social norm is and has been to ignore the people around you as much as possible, even more so in East Asian cultures, and more so when it's very crowded. If everyone were talking and socializing, it would be very loud in the subway car.
- haukilup 13y ago
  In many populated cities, talking on the subway/train/etc is considered extremely rude. It changes from culture to culture, but I think it'd be weird if they didn't do something with their time since being talkative or social isn't an option. Instead of carrying around a book or sudoku puzzle everywhere for such situations, people just use their phone.
jonnathanson 13y ago
"This time, I looked up, and all 10 or so of the people waiting in the show were literally buried, absorbed in their smart phones, and the shop stood stark silence. The people on their own, the kids, the parents, the couples, the whole damn lot." Little bit of a shameless plug, and I apologize, but I wrote a piece recently about how this phenomenon is starting to have some very interesting effects in public places (supermarkets, for instance): http://priceonomics.com/are-smartphones-making-us-less-impulsive/ http://priceonomics.com/are-smartphones-making-us-less-impul... Everywhere I go, I see the same thing: people's heads buried in their phones. I hear the same thing: the continual pitter-patter of push notifications and texting. It is indeed creepy, but it's the new normal. And I wonder what things will look and sound like when wearable devices become the new normal. Another link, this time not a plug: http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2013/09/130920094627.htm http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2013/09/130920094627.ht... Endless stimulation and distraction -- whether from phones, from idle web surfing, etc. -- might have some really bad consequences for the brain. It turns out that the brain is unable to clear its cache, so to speak, when it's in a state of constant stimulation.
cl3m 13y ago
Smartphone are still quite new for a lot of people.. Hopefully after a while it will become social awkward to be glued to your phone all the time.
chrisgd 13y ago
I don't see a problem here. I don't recommend we give our children a smartphone and allow them unlimited usage, but if a bunch of adults are standing around looking at their phone while waiting on take-out, who cares? Did everyone sit around in in-depth discussions with strangers before? I remember people would sit and read the newspaper or a book or stare into space while waiting. 3-4 times to get someone's attention for every person, or did it happen once? Could have easily happened if they were reading their Arthur C. Clarke novels as well.
- codyb 13y ago
  When I started college in 2008 I remember almost always being able to talk a cute girl or at least another person on the bus. When I finished in 2013 (switched majors and studied in France so 5 years it was) that happened incredibly rarely. It's hard to talk to someone when they have head phones in or are buried in some sort of game and almost every single person had their headphones in. Even a book I can casually ask what some one is reading when they look up. No smart phone for me thank you kindly. Even when I hang out with friends I occasionally experience moments where everyone but me is just staring at their phones. Then I wonder why I'm hanging out there. It's weird.
  - tekalon 13y ago
    Ever think that they do this so they don't have to talk to you? While on bus or waiting, I've used the book/phone/etc as an excuse to ignore someone that I KNEW was waiting for conversation with ANYONE. My mindset- "I don't know you, I don't care what your selling, I don't care if you think I'm pretty- your not getting a date, I'm not here to entertain you"
    - codyb 13y ago
      I got at least a few dates and made a few friends on the bus for sure. I never bothered people who were obviously doing something. By the end it was impossible to find people who were just riding the bus was the point of the post as opposed to doing something. Is that the world we should strive to live in where no one can make connections randomly and without prior introduction? If you're not busy, and I'm not busy, what's the big deal with talking to someone? And not only that but is everyones 9,000th run of temple run worth a society of people who have no ability to communicate outside of pre setup social scenarios?
jotm 13y ago
Heh, this is definitely a trend everywhere. Thankfully, it doesn't affect me because I hate small screens. I don't know why, I used to sink into my smartphone just like you described but these days I just get angry if I try to do anything on a sub 10-inch. In fact touch screens on the go are pure hell - I try to take a photo, I touch the wrong part of the screen, use the flashlight, turn it off accidentally, try to edit a note, scroll or edit it in the wrong place, gah!
- majani 13y ago
  Nope, its a very first world problem. If you bring this "phone everywhere" behavior to third world countries, you'll be jacked on your first day here, no lie.
freshhawk 13y ago
Have you seen the short film called "I Forgot my Phone" (http://youtu.be/OINa46HeWg8 http://youtu.be/OINa46HeWg8)? It deals with exactly this subject and has a great surreal creepy vibe. Made me think about how many times I've been that blinking person who didn't hear their food order, which I dislike but keep doing.
- alan_cx 13y ago
  I have now. Yeah, kinda my observation(s). Its like people don't experience life through their own eyes any more. Even though they are right there, they prefer to watch it on their portable small screen.
TausAmmer 13y ago
When I await my order being prepared I look outside window and observe people, cars, interactions and sometimes it takes for staff to call me several times for me to come back to realization where I am. Other times I just go into sort of dreamworld of mine, I start to think about anything and block external signals, this shields me more from outside world than looking outside window. Of course I need to be pulled out from this state. I do not have smartphone, tablet and I do not read leaflets, papers while waiting.

by alan_cx 13y ago

hfsktr 13y ago

"And the weirdest thing was, as they came to, coming out of their smart phone spell, each and every one of them had that look of some one who had just woken up in the morning. Eyes blinking, rubbing eyes, the slow realization of where you are, what you are doing, what comes next, etc." I bet the same would happen if they had a book or magazine and were reading or even just staring off into space and daydreaming or watching TV. Change of context.

jkscm 13y ago

The dosage makes the poison. So yes, overuse is not healthy. But consider another angle: for me a smartphone can fill useless time like waiting for an appointment, the bus, etc. instead of wasting their time these people text their loved ones, read articles about self employment or check reddit for cat pictures. Giving someone not the attention they might deserve is indeed rude. But i hope customs will change hopefully to the better and people put their smartphones down when appropriate. But i don't think it is right other without knowing the context and what they're doing. Edit: I think i want a better mute button for my phone and a hardware mute button for my laptop. Everything should be hidden besides calls from circa 5 people and the third call from one number. Besides that the OS should not show me any notification, message,etc. not even the notification light should blink and when i check the time on the phone i should not see how many messages i missed

digitalsushi 13y ago
Try eating dinner with a group of current college kids and hoping they put their phones down to listen to you. There is no way the trend is going to reverse itself. I try not to be a cynic but on this topic it's impossible for me - what event could trigger a reversal to this behavior? What would make people prefer people again over digital distractions?
- mhurron 13y ago
  > what event could trigger a reversal to this behavior? The collapse of society and all of its support. Basically, you'll have to make them useless.
- protonfish 13y ago
  Most teenagers are self-absorbed little snots so I don't think blaming the phone is fair. This is not a "trend." Smartphones are still a very new technology and there is a gap between the changes they have made in our lives and the development of proper etiquette.
- mhb 13y ago
  Maybe we are just experiencing a transitional (decades?) phase en route to living entirely in the virtual realm. Do people in Second Life walk around looking at their phones?

weland 13y ago

This is part of the reason why I obnoxiously refuse to get a smartphone. My phone is still the cheapest Nokia phone I could get. The social behaviour they generate is interesting on every front. For instance, there's this shopping mall close to the center of the city where I live. On the last floor, there are a bunch of restaurants, a small tobacco shop and the toilets. I go there fairly often, either for the tobacco or to hit the toilet. Every restaurant has incredibly pushy promoters; the moment you set foot on that floor, these people immediately start handing you flyers, telling you about their restaurant, following you a couple of steps. I do my best to be polite with them; I know they're working on next to no payment, for imbecile bosses who think this is a good sales technique, so I'm never rude with them or anything. I just smile and say "Yeah, maybe some other time". Sometimes, however, I'm just not in the mood for that. Long days, my own retarded boss, the incredible urge to go to the toilet (for some reason, there's no toilet around the place...), my hurry to get home and, until about a year ago, a lingering depression, simply mean I'm sometimes not up even to the little human interaction I need in order to politely refuse them. So I just pop up my phone and pretend I'm reading a message or dialing a number. Suddenly, everyone's OK. No one would even dare disturb me. If I pretend I'm talking on the phone, the pushier ones will apologize for disturbing me, but will otherwise eagerly present me their offering. But if I have my eyes buried in it, it's like I'm suddenly invisible. One time, I even had to wait there for one of my friends to arrive, and stood there for at least five or ten minutes. No one even approached me as long as I kept my eyes down. I put the phone in my pocket for like five seconds because I thought I'd lost my wallet -- poof, two chicks appear to invite me to the marvelous restaurant that just opened and has a special offer just for me.

AznHisoka 13y ago
I think I would excuse this behavior in large cities, or when you feel overexposed to stimulation. I mean, it DOES take a ton of effort to be attentive to every single human that you encounter, whether it's in an mundane setting like a subway/shopping mall, or at work. Especially if you live in a huge city like SF, or NYC. If you don't distract yourself once in awhile, by immersing yourself with something like a smartphone, I imagine it's very easy to get drained out with so much stimulation. I mean, if we lived in the caveman age, or even the medieval ages where we encountered the same 20 or so people every single day, then yes, there's no need for the smartphone, but in the modern day, I think it's almost necessary to survive mentally. I look at it this way: Humans were not meant to live in highly populated areas where they interact with a thousand strangers every single day.

Anonymous9823 13y ago

I was traveling on the metro in Korea late one night. There were maybe 20 people in the train car, and literally every single one was staring down at their smart phone. I had to laugh, there wasn't a single exception and not a word spoken, as new people got on, sat down, and pulled out their phone. This went on for 10 or 20 minutes, then finally someone made a noise. It was a women pointing to her screen to share something with a friend next to her. Then they both went back to their separate phones and the mobile train continued forward. This was the first time I noticed everyone on their phone, and I felt like I was in the twilight zone. There would be groups of three or four friends sitting in a line, not speaking a single word. Eerie.

ijk 13y ago
Given that metros and elevators are the kind of public private spaces where the social norm is to ignore the people around you as much as possible (at least, in most mass transit cultures I'm familiar with) this long predates the smart phone and the cell phone.
- kyllo 13y ago
  When I lived in Seoul in 2008-2010, people were not only using smartphones, they were watching television on their smartphones, in the subway. Smartphones in Korea have built-in TV tuners. And yes, the social norm is and has been to ignore the people around you as much as possible, even more so in East Asian cultures, and more so when it's very crowded. If everyone were talking and socializing, it would be very loud in the subway car.
haukilup 13y ago
In many populated cities, talking on the subway/train/etc is considered extremely rude. It changes from culture to culture, but I think it'd be weird if they didn't do something with their time since being talkative or social isn't an option. Instead of carrying around a book or sudoku puzzle everywhere for such situations, people just use their phone.

jonnathanson 13y ago

"This time, I looked up, and all 10 or so of the people waiting in the show were literally buried, absorbed in their smart phones, and the shop stood stark silence. The people on their own, the kids, the parents, the couples, the whole damn lot." Little bit of a shameless plug, and I apologize, but I wrote a piece recently about how this phenomenon is starting to have some very interesting effects in public places (supermarkets, for instance): http://priceonomics.com/are-smartphones-making-us-less-impulsive/ http://priceonomics.com/are-smartphones-making-us-less-impul... Everywhere I go, I see the same thing: people's heads buried in their phones. I hear the same thing: the continual pitter-patter of push notifications and texting. It is indeed creepy, but it's the new normal. And I wonder what things will look and sound like when wearable devices become the new normal. Another link, this time not a plug: http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2013/09/130920094627.htm http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2013/09/130920094627.ht... Endless stimulation and distraction -- whether from phones, from idle web surfing, etc. -- might have some really bad consequences for the brain. It turns out that the brain is unable to clear its cache, so to speak, when it's in a state of constant stimulation.

cl3m 13y ago

Smartphone are still quite new for a lot of people.. Hopefully after a while it will become social awkward to be glued to your phone all the time.

chrisgd 13y ago

I don't see a problem here. I don't recommend we give our children a smartphone and allow them unlimited usage, but if a bunch of adults are standing around looking at their phone while waiting on take-out, who cares? Did everyone sit around in in-depth discussions with strangers before? I remember people would sit and read the newspaper or a book or stare into space while waiting. 3-4 times to get someone's attention for every person, or did it happen once? Could have easily happened if they were reading their Arthur C. Clarke novels as well.

codyb 13y ago
When I started college in 2008 I remember almost always being able to talk a cute girl or at least another person on the bus. When I finished in 2013 (switched majors and studied in France so 5 years it was) that happened incredibly rarely. It's hard to talk to someone when they have head phones in or are buried in some sort of game and almost every single person had their headphones in. Even a book I can casually ask what some one is reading when they look up. No smart phone for me thank you kindly. Even when I hang out with friends I occasionally experience moments where everyone but me is just staring at their phones. Then I wonder why I'm hanging out there. It's weird.
- tekalon 13y ago
  Ever think that they do this so they don't have to talk to you? While on bus or waiting, I've used the book/phone/etc as an excuse to ignore someone that I KNEW was waiting for conversation with ANYONE. My mindset- "I don't know you, I don't care what your selling, I don't care if you think I'm pretty- your not getting a date, I'm not here to entertain you"
  - codyb 13y ago
    I got at least a few dates and made a few friends on the bus for sure. I never bothered people who were obviously doing something. By the end it was impossible to find people who were just riding the bus was the point of the post as opposed to doing something. Is that the world we should strive to live in where no one can make connections randomly and without prior introduction? If you're not busy, and I'm not busy, what's the big deal with talking to someone? And not only that but is everyones 9,000th run of temple run worth a society of people who have no ability to communicate outside of pre setup social scenarios?

jotm 13y ago

Heh, this is definitely a trend everywhere. Thankfully, it doesn't affect me because I hate small screens. I don't know why, I used to sink into my smartphone just like you described but these days I just get angry if I try to do anything on a sub 10-inch. In fact touch screens on the go are pure hell - I try to take a photo, I touch the wrong part of the screen, use the flashlight, turn it off accidentally, try to edit a note, scroll or edit it in the wrong place, gah!

majani 13y ago
Nope, its a very first world problem. If you bring this "phone everywhere" behavior to third world countries, you'll be jacked on your first day here, no lie.

freshhawk 13y ago

Have you seen the short film called "I Forgot my Phone" (http://youtu.be/OINa46HeWg8 http://youtu.be/OINa46HeWg8)? It deals with exactly this subject and has a great surreal creepy vibe. Made me think about how many times I've been that blinking person who didn't hear their food order, which I dislike but keep doing.

alan_cx 13y ago
I have now. Yeah, kinda my observation(s). Its like people don't experience life through their own eyes any more. Even though they are right there, they prefer to watch it on their portable small screen.

TausAmmer 13y ago

When I await my order being prepared I look outside window and observe people, cars, interactions and sometimes it takes for staff to call me several times for me to come back to realization where I am. Other times I just go into sort of dreamworld of mine, I start to think about anything and block external signals, this shields me more from outside world than looking outside window. Of course I need to be pulled out from this state. I do not have smartphone, tablet and I do not read leaflets, papers while waiting.