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I've heard a fair number of people say this, as a ha-ha throw-away line. ...but it alway galls me. Raising and providing for your kids is the most important t

• nostrademons 17y ago
  When you think about it, dead baby jokes are horribly offensive too... ...which is a good reason not to think about it. ;-) I completely agree that if you think through the joke, logically, it's really not all that funny and kinda offensive. But there are lots of jokes that are pretty offensive when you think through them. Dead-baby jokes. Microsoft Bing jokes. Various ethnic jokes. Holocaust jokes. The reason why we find them funny is because they stretch the bounds of social propriety. I find it's better to draw a line between lets-be-serious-this-is-a-bad-thing mode and okay-we're-joking-now-say-whatever-you-want mode. Because things get awful dreary if you never joke about stuff that's morbid, depressing, and generally a bad thing. It's like humor is the natural human coping mechanism...
  • jonsen 17y ago
    and a reference mechanism. Providing contrast. You can't appreciate good if you don't know bad. Morbid jokes are also a subtle way of reminding us of the unthinkable.
  • justin_vanw 17y ago
    Most of them aren't that clever. Like why is it easier to load a truck with dead babies than live babies? I'm sure there are all kinds of reasons (mostly because live babies are very fragile and you would have to be careful) not just because you can use a pitchfork.
• gruseom 17y ago
  Raising and providing for your kids is the most important thing in life I've heard a fair number of people say this, as a social piety line - one of those things everyone nods their head at, with which you're not supposed to disagree. But I do disagree. Certainly it's important. But there's nothing more important than reproduction and the endless family trance? I refuse to accept that. I observe a lot of people doing a passable job of raising and providing for their kids and using that as an excuse for never pursuing what they really wanted. It is the socially acceptable way to plug the existential void (for twenty years, anyway). Apart from its obvious flaws is the ironic fact that in the end, it's a lousy, dispiriting example to set for one's kids. I applaud your defense of responsibility. But after years of struggling with this, one thing I am sure of is that it's not as simple as TV moralists want to make it.
  • endtime 17y ago
    > But there's nothing more important than reproduction and the endless family trance? I refuse to accept that. I think there are two interpretations. One is that having and raising kids is the most important thing you can do. This is, as you say, questionable (which is not to say that it's not extremely important to me, personally). The second, however, and the one I think tjic meant, is that if you do have kids, then raising them and providing for them is your primary responsibility. I think that's a lot harder to dispute.
    • gruseom 17y ago
      It's clear that he didn't mean the first interpretation, because he said "your" kids, i.e. presupposing that you have them. Primary responsibility? Sure, up to a point. Where that point is is what's in question. "Most important thing in life" is far too absolute. Is anything more dangerous than a socially acceptable opiate?
      • endtime 17y ago
        There's a difference between "most important thing" and "only important thing".
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• tdavis 17y ago
  Raising and providing for your kids is the most important thing in life No, it's the most important thing in your life. Do you know what I find more appalling than not knowing or caring whether one has procreated? People who pass judgement on those people based on their own opinions. I'm sorry, but there is no objective reasoning whatsoever to claim that raising/providing for one's children is the most important thing in life and for you to suggest same, and berate others for not taking your viewpoint, is the only appalling thing here. Get off your high horse. (no, I have no children, illegitimate or otherwise)
  • tome 17y ago
    > > Raising and providing for your kids is the most important thing in life > No, it's the most important thing in your life. Do you know what I find more appalling than not knowing or caring whether one has procreated? People who pass judgement on those people based on their own opinions. No, it's the most important thing in one's kid's life.
    • tdavis 17y ago
      It is necessary for children to be raised, obviously. It is not necessary for one to raise their own children; kids can be adopted, have single parents, etc.
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  • bmj 17y ago
    Is there objective reasoning to claim that doing something else besides raising your children well is the most important thing in life? For myself, yes, raising my children well is the most important thing in my life. Of course, part of that means doing my job well, since providing material things like food and shelter is critical to the good life. But at the end of the day, my work can't supersede my commitment to my family. Our goal as a family is to foster the sort of "home economics" that Wendell Berry writes about--a home that is economically productive as a unit, not as separate parts. That said, before I had children, I really had no grasp of what it meant to be a parent. Ten years ago, I could have never imagined having kids, let alone being as committed to them as I am now. I don't say this because I think I'm the greatest parent in the world (far from it, really), but because I think you really can't understand how being a parent changes your outlook on life (if you take your new role as a parent seriously). If you don't have kids, good for you. I say, if you don't really want them, then don't have them. My life has certainly changed for the better because of them, but I don't expect that to be true for everyone. Do what you wish, just be sure you do it well.