This is one of the problems with teaching emotional intelligence. It's subjective, and most people feel very strongly that they way they were raised was the (on

This is one of the problems with teaching emotional intelligence. It's subjective, and most people feel very strongly that they way they were raised was the (only) right way. From my perspective (and probably that of most psychology and behavioral science researchers) that behavior on the part of your mother is unhealthy and not to be tolerated. You are also unlikely to find support among academic for the notion that a grown woman's inability to control her emotions justifies inflicting severe pain on an largely helpless child. (There is some research supporting spanking, but almost never out condoning spanking while upset.)