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>The way you get better at X is to do it. For pretty much >all X. A bit off topic, but one of the few X where this does not hold is marriage. Statistically, f

>The way you get better at X is to do it. For pretty much >all X. A bit off topic, but one of the few X where this does not hold is marriage. Statistically, first marriages are more likely to succeed than any subsequent marriage.

wpietri 13y ago
That's an interesting example! Sorry I missed this until now. I think you might have confused "getting married" with "being married". People who get married several times are probably pretty good at the getting married part. People who stay married, though, probably work hard on the day-to-day experience of being married. In the same way good writers work hard each day on the writing.
metricman 13y ago
This statistic doesn't seem immediately relevant. Success of marriage (let's say in years before divorce) is heavily influenced by the background of the individual. Think about getting sent back to the beginning of your marriage, would you be better (with that one)? You would... that's the point.
grkvlt 13y ago
Not true - you're measuring the wrong thing. The X that is improving with practice is 'Being Married to person P' and statistically, the longer you are married to a particular person, the more likely it is to stay that way. [1] [1] http://www.ons.gov.uk/ons/rel/vsob1/divorces-in-england-and-wales/2011/sty-what-percentage-of-marriages-end-in-divorce.html http://www.ons.gov.uk/ons/rel/vsob1/divorces-in-england-and-...
- lesterbuck 13y ago
  You are welcome to measure anything you want. I am only reporting the statistics of marriage. First marriages fail about 50% of the time, while second marriages fail in the 70% range. Therefore, people are, on average, worse at their second and subsequent marriages than their first. It is rather irritating to contemplate, but the average person does not get better at staying married with practice, at least for "practicing" marriages with different people. My point was that there exist skills (or goal oriented behavior, here the presumed goal being to stay married) that do not necessarily improve with "practice." Nothing else comes to mind, but I would be interested in other things that break the common notion of always getting better with "practice." Human beings are very complicated, and I can imagine other situations where practice does not make perfect. I remember reading some research about divorced people where many reported that they had underestimated the emotional devastation that they felt after the divorce, and that if they had known how hard it would be, they would have tried much harder to rebuild their marriage. As another off topic comment about how complicated people are, in marketing it is important to let people know that what you are selling is easy and quick and convenient and ... Except for one area, where it is critical to tell people how hard it will be and how much work they will have to do if they buy your product. And that field is body building. Body builders buy products that pitch how hard they will have to work and how much pain they will need to endure. Go figure.

wpietri 13y ago

That's an interesting example! Sorry I missed this until now. I think you might have confused "getting married" with "being married". People who get married several times are probably pretty good at the getting married part. People who stay married, though, probably work hard on the day-to-day experience of being married. In the same way good writers work hard each day on the writing.

metricman 13y ago

This statistic doesn't seem immediately relevant. Success of marriage (let's say in years before divorce) is heavily influenced by the background of the individual. Think about getting sent back to the beginning of your marriage, would you be better (with that one)? You would... that's the point.

grkvlt 13y ago

Not true - you're measuring the wrong thing. The X that is improving with practice is 'Being Married to person P' and statistically, the longer you are married to a particular person, the more likely it is to stay that way. [1] [1] http://www.ons.gov.uk/ons/rel/vsob1/divorces-in-england-and-wales/2011/sty-what-percentage-of-marriages-end-in-divorce.html http://www.ons.gov.uk/ons/rel/vsob1/divorces-in-england-and-...

lesterbuck 13y ago
You are welcome to measure anything you want. I am only reporting the statistics of marriage. First marriages fail about 50% of the time, while second marriages fail in the 70% range. Therefore, people are, on average, worse at their second and subsequent marriages than their first. It is rather irritating to contemplate, but the average person does not get better at staying married with practice, at least for "practicing" marriages with different people. My point was that there exist skills (or goal oriented behavior, here the presumed goal being to stay married) that do not necessarily improve with "practice." Nothing else comes to mind, but I would be interested in other things that break the common notion of always getting better with "practice." Human beings are very complicated, and I can imagine other situations where practice does not make perfect. I remember reading some research about divorced people where many reported that they had underestimated the emotional devastation that they felt after the divorce, and that if they had known how hard it would be, they would have tried much harder to rebuild their marriage. As another off topic comment about how complicated people are, in marketing it is important to let people know that what you are selling is easy and quick and convenient and ... Except for one area, where it is critical to tell people how hard it will be and how much work they will have to do if they buy your product. And that field is body building. Body builders buy products that pitch how hard they will have to work and how much pain they will need to endure. Go figure.