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You are having a very strong reaction so I assume it's personal for you. Past experience? A strong reaction like this is normal if the topic "pushes your butto
by nikster 13y ago
You are having a very strong reaction so I assume it's personal for you. Past experience?
A strong reaction like this is normal if the topic "pushes your buttons" - and we all have buttons to push.
When you notice anger rising in you, take it as an opportunity to see where it's coming from. Don't prevent it (you can't, so no point trying) - but look at it, get to know it. It might take you over temporarily so you're unable to do that - that's fine. At some point you'll have calmed down and the opportunity is created.
What I wrote wasn't meant as advice; it was meant as the truth. If you're ready, you will see it. If you're not ready it probably won't help you at all, it will just seem like gibberish to you. I am not here to save anyone nor could I. Things unfold at their own speed. So I meant he's having this learning experience, the bigger the breakdown, the bigger the chance to see the truth.
- vanderZwan 13y agoYes, my buttons were pushed, and yes, due to past experience - I did announce I was bullied, didn't I? But don't worry, I've done the mindfullness thing, and it indeed helps in most situations. But it also illustrates my point: it took me almost a decade of simply not being bullied and recovering in caring surroundings (fellow nerds with similar interests I met in college) before I was ready for these type of techniques. To use an analogy to physical harm: saying a bullied person needs to have a thicker skin is the same as saying to "walk it off" when you have a broken leg - yeah, walking is important to get the leg working properly again, and strengthening it against future damage, but only once it's been healed somewhat. You can't start physical rehab earlier than that.