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This article is conflating "calling someone smart" and "implying the person has bad social skills". If you have good social skills, they'll be evident as soon

by dfxm12 13y ago

This article is conflating "calling someone smart" and "implying the person has bad social skills". If you have good social skills, they'll be evident as soon as you are introduced to someone, no matter how you are initially described. Look that person in the eye & shake their hand (or do whatever culture dictates you do). That's more of an impression than what someone else says. Even if the way you are described is what sticks out most, and your intelligence is stronger than your social skills or experience, that does not imply (and I really don't think most infer) that you have "negative" social skills. You could have "good" social skills (or experience) that is just outweighed by "excellent" intelligence, or even neutral social skills. A sample comparison: When you say someone has a nice personality, is does not mean they're also ugly.

jessedhillon 13y ago
You're talking about logical possibilities -- yes it is logically possible that someone could be called smart when their best quality is actually tap dancing. Author is talking about why people introduce you as the smart guy, and not the friendly guy or the guy who gets shit done. Because they are speaking a code, of sorts, in that they are attempting to portray you in a positive light but your intelligence is actually not a highly-valued trait. If, when asked "what did you think of that woman you saw last night?" your response is that she has a nice personality then yes, people will assume she is homely. If you were excited about her looks, your answer (it's assumed) would've been about how attractive she is. Maybe you meant to describe her personality irrespective of her looks, but that's not how people will interpret your message. Communicating is about talking to people in a way that they understand you. So you could sit there cross-armed and insistent that you are not insinuating anything against her looks, as there is no logical interpretation of your statement which requires that conclusion. But, then, you would probably be the person this post is most for.

by dfxm12 13y ago

jessedhillon 13y ago

You're talking about logical possibilities -- yes it is logically possible that someone could be called smart when their best quality is actually tap dancing. Author is talking about why people introduce you as the smart guy, and not the friendly guy or the guy who gets shit done. Because they are speaking a code, of sorts, in that they are attempting to portray you in a positive light but your intelligence is actually not a highly-valued trait. If, when asked "what did you think of that woman you saw last night?" your response is that she has a nice personality then yes, people will assume she is homely. If you were excited about her looks, your answer (it's assumed) would've been about how attractive she is. Maybe you meant to describe her personality irrespective of her looks, but that's not how people will interpret your message. Communicating is about talking to people in a way that they understand you. So you could sit there cross-armed and insistent that you are not insinuating anything against her looks, as there is no logical interpretation of your statement which requires that conclusion. But, then, you would probably be the person this post is most for.