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"Try having 'no filter' in a marriage and most of you would be headed for divorce." Agree. Most business owners as well would have little success with this unl

by larrys 13y ago

"Try having 'no filter' in a marriage and most of you would be headed for divorce." Agree. Most business owners as well would have little success with this unless they have desperate employees where desperate means "can't quit for economic reasons". Except for celebrities (of who PG is certainly a celebrity with the majority of people who get into YC or are on HN (although not as much)). Jobs can do this. PG can do this. Others of equivalent stature can because they have what others want. So those "others" will eat all types of shit in order to get their ticket punched. Most people who aren't desperate for their job (or an investment) will not put up with abusive type behavior. They will walk. For the record I had done that back when I was in college. First time it happened. Money and tolerance for abuse are closely related. For the record the thing that bothers me more is the tone and anger as opposed to the words.

joshuaellinger 13y ago
The tone/anger is part of the communication. But you can be 'angry because you suck' or you can be 'angry because I believe you are better than that'. It's a world of difference. PG has the decided advantage of having an audience that knows he believes that they are capable of greatness. That makes it a lot easier to say things like that. I'd say that, for me, respect and tolerance is closely related. My point is that you need to consider how your audience will hear what you say which is, by definition, a filter. Some of my employees need constant feedback about how they are doing. Some just need a nudge. Knowing the difference is really important.
jamesaguilar 13y ago
It's also worth noting that I believe PG's reputation is mostly even-keeled. The incident described in this post sounds like an outlier. If you're regularly escalating to this level of rhetoric in code reviews or meetings at work, you're probably not using the same criteria for deciding when this kind of talk is justified compared to Mr. Graham. I've seen more virulent language on this site over relatively innocuous comments, which is one example of something I doubt PG would endorse. Who knows if he would even endorse what he said in this conversation, albeit this time it did work.
- larrys 13y ago
  "The incident described in this post sounds like an outlier." Would agree that was the impression I had as well. Strictly for discussion purposes, from my experience, behavior that starts out as an outlier (which works) ends up being the modus operandi if the lack of kickback and inevitable positive reinforcement (in terms of compliance) keep coming. In the same way that a child not corrected or disciplined will continue acting out especially if they get their way by doing so.
adrianbye 13y ago
nothing wrong with pushing back. its becoming noticeable how americans are turning into babies though

by larrys 13y ago

joshuaellinger 13y ago

The tone/anger is part of the communication. But you can be 'angry because you suck' or you can be 'angry because I believe you are better than that'. It's a world of difference. PG has the decided advantage of having an audience that knows he believes that they are capable of greatness. That makes it a lot easier to say things like that. I'd say that, for me, respect and tolerance is closely related. My point is that you need to consider how your audience will hear what you say which is, by definition, a filter. Some of my employees need constant feedback about how they are doing. Some just need a nudge. Knowing the difference is really important.

jamesaguilar 13y ago

It's also worth noting that I believe PG's reputation is mostly even-keeled. The incident described in this post sounds like an outlier. If you're regularly escalating to this level of rhetoric in code reviews or meetings at work, you're probably not using the same criteria for deciding when this kind of talk is justified compared to Mr. Graham. I've seen more virulent language on this site over relatively innocuous comments, which is one example of something I doubt PG would endorse. Who knows if he would even endorse what he said in this conversation, albeit this time it did work.

larrys 13y ago
"The incident described in this post sounds like an outlier." Would agree that was the impression I had as well. Strictly for discussion purposes, from my experience, behavior that starts out as an outlier (which works) ends up being the modus operandi if the lack of kickback and inevitable positive reinforcement (in terms of compliance) keep coming. In the same way that a child not corrected or disciplined will continue acting out especially if they get their way by doing so.

adrianbye 13y ago

nothing wrong with pushing back. its becoming noticeable how americans are turning into babies though