4 ms·

"He's a very lucky boy, but as parents we just have to say no to a lot of things to give him a normal life. The most important thing is that he can relate to hi

"He's a very lucky boy, but as parents we just have to say no to a lot of things to give him a normal life. The most important thing is that he can relate to his peers and not be seen as any different." It's interesting how many people with "normal" lives desire to live in the limelight, yet those who are already there just seek to be normal. Is relating to your peers and not being seen as any different the most important thing?

anug 13y ago
Typical YC response.
- scribu 13y ago
  Without describing in what way it's "typical" (I presume in a bad way), this comment isn't helpful at all.
  - rmk2 13y ago
    I'll bite (woe is me, poor karma...) HN is all about showing people how extraordinary you are (or at least, how extraordinary you think you are). Normal is equated with a state of stasis that needs to be overcome (or, as the cool kids/rockstars/codeninjas[sic] call it, "disrupted"). The same HN regularly upvotes and heavily "discusses" stories about people who were "screwed over by the normal [education] system", who were too special without other people realising. HN is about getting rich, or at least richer than average (or, as the boring average-Joe lives are sometimes called, normal), about creating, sticking out, being the one-in-a-million, yes-you-can wholesale embodiment of the American Dream(tm), according to which we will all one day be rich and famous if we only work hard enough with as little interference as possible (regulation is a horror, HORROR, I tell you) from state, ethics or, worse even, "average" users, the normal users very much akin to imbeciles. Is it a surprise many here do not want (or cannot?) understand why aspiring to be "normal" and to fit in might be a diserable thing for other people?
    - wtvanhest 13y ago
      I agree with you partially, and upvoted you, but part of what makes HN great is that it makes me feel normal to be ultra motivated. Maybe some people make pompous comments, or complain about first world/high class problems, but it is the only place I have found, on the net or otherwise which the ultra motivated outweigh those seeking to fit in.
    - georgemcbay 13y ago
      I spend a fair amount of time on HN (probably too much) and write lots of comments here and enjoy a pretty good amount of upvotes and I'm a big fan of being normal and not much of a limelight seeker. I'm also basically a socialist and roll my eyes at most calls for deregulation of (whatever). I'm not sure you can lump all of HN so cleanly into one bucket.
      - rmk2 13y ago
        My comment might involve a certain mount of hyperbole. In this case, it is exactly lumping all of HN together for the sake of making a point. I see this as a function of self-reflexion and self-critique, which no functioning system in my opinion can do without. Don't forget that I am also a member of this site, I read the articles, I vote and I post. This obviously suggests that HN is not homogenous but instead can serve as a platform for differing opinions. I do think, however, that my hyperbole describes a certain active (and, dare I say very vocal?) portion of the posters here. If you (and some of the other posters who have replied below) don't fall within that group then that is a good thing.
        nknighthb 13y ago
        You describe a certain very vocal portion of the American public. I'm not sure their proportions on HN are significantly out of whack.
    - deleted 13y ago
      [deleted]
    - nknighthb 13y ago
Fishkins 13y ago
"relating to your peers" is too narrow of a phrase, but it seems likely having satisfying interpersonal relationships of some sort is very important. I would say it's the most important thing after basic necessities for survival. I don't, however, think "not [being] seen as any different" is necessary for that.
- robryan 13y ago
  It is possible though that this kid might not relate to the kids in the local neighborhood that well. With the Internet now though I think this starts to become less of a problem, if you are an outlier you can now relate to like minded outliers online or at interest based meet ups.
sliverstorm 13y ago
My conclusion has been that those who are "normal" want some fame- they don't want to be splattered across tabloids everywhere, they just want people to know their name and what they do. People who are super famous probably want the same thing- not to be unknown, but maybe a little less famous.
arjie 13y ago
Everyone seeks normalcy in certain aspects, and fame in others. You'd be hard pressed to find many amongst those who wish to live in the limelight who would want every moment of their lives photographed so that the tiniest of their mistakes can be displayed in full colour in public. And unless you're Perelman, most people want some recognition for the things they do that they're proud of. Would it be nice for this child to be recognized for his talent? Yes. Would it be nice for his peers to see him as some painting freak? No.

anug 13y ago

Typical YC response.

scribu 13y ago
Without describing in what way it's "typical" (I presume in a bad way), this comment isn't helpful at all.
- rmk2 13y ago
  I'll bite (woe is me, poor karma...) HN is all about showing people how extraordinary you are (or at least, how extraordinary you think you are). Normal is equated with a state of stasis that needs to be overcome (or, as the cool kids/rockstars/codeninjas[sic] call it, "disrupted"). The same HN regularly upvotes and heavily "discusses" stories about people who were "screwed over by the normal [education] system", who were too special without other people realising. HN is about getting rich, or at least richer than average (or, as the boring average-Joe lives are sometimes called, normal), about creating, sticking out, being the one-in-a-million, yes-you-can wholesale embodiment of the American Dream(tm), according to which we will all one day be rich and famous if we only work hard enough with as little interference as possible (regulation is a horror, HORROR, I tell you) from state, ethics or, worse even, "average" users, the normal users very much akin to imbeciles. Is it a surprise many here do not want (or cannot?) understand why aspiring to be "normal" and to fit in might be a diserable thing for other people?
  - wtvanhest 13y ago
    I agree with you partially, and upvoted you, but part of what makes HN great is that it makes me feel normal to be ultra motivated. Maybe some people make pompous comments, or complain about first world/high class problems, but it is the only place I have found, on the net or otherwise which the ultra motivated outweigh those seeking to fit in.
  - georgemcbay 13y ago
    I spend a fair amount of time on HN (probably too much) and write lots of comments here and enjoy a pretty good amount of upvotes and I'm a big fan of being normal and not much of a limelight seeker. I'm also basically a socialist and roll my eyes at most calls for deregulation of (whatever). I'm not sure you can lump all of HN so cleanly into one bucket.
    - rmk2 13y ago
      My comment might involve a certain mount of hyperbole. In this case, it is exactly lumping all of HN together for the sake of making a point. I see this as a function of self-reflexion and self-critique, which no functioning system in my opinion can do without. Don't forget that I am also a member of this site, I read the articles, I vote and I post. This obviously suggests that HN is not homogenous but instead can serve as a platform for differing opinions. I do think, however, that my hyperbole describes a certain active (and, dare I say very vocal?) portion of the posters here. If you (and some of the other posters who have replied below) don't fall within that group then that is a good thing.
      - nknighthb 13y ago
        You describe a certain very vocal portion of the American public. I'm not sure their proportions on HN are significantly out of whack.
  - deleted 13y ago
    [deleted]
  - nknighthb 13y ago

Fishkins 13y ago

"relating to your peers" is too narrow of a phrase, but it seems likely having satisfying interpersonal relationships of some sort is very important. I would say it's the most important thing after basic necessities for survival. I don't, however, think "not [being] seen as any different" is necessary for that.

robryan 13y ago
It is possible though that this kid might not relate to the kids in the local neighborhood that well. With the Internet now though I think this starts to become less of a problem, if you are an outlier you can now relate to like minded outliers online or at interest based meet ups.

sliverstorm 13y ago

My conclusion has been that those who are "normal" want some fame- they don't want to be splattered across tabloids everywhere, they just want people to know their name and what they do. People who are super famous probably want the same thing- not to be unknown, but maybe a little less famous.

arjie 13y ago

Everyone seeks normalcy in certain aspects, and fame in others. You'd be hard pressed to find many amongst those who wish to live in the limelight who would want every moment of their lives photographed so that the tiniest of their mistakes can be displayed in full colour in public. And unless you're Perelman, most people want some recognition for the things they do that they're proud of. Would it be nice for this child to be recognized for his talent? Yes. Would it be nice for his peers to see him as some painting freak? No.