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Thanks, very sobering. I am struggling with this recently. I have been trying to make people like me online and its been a losing battle. I believe you are corr

Thanks, very sobering. I am struggling with this recently. I have been trying to make people like me online and its been a losing battle. I believe you are correct about your suggestions. I am going to abandon my quest for recognition and do things help people instead. That is such a better use of time, yet it never occurred to me as plainly as you put it. Thank you

kls 13y ago
You can't make people like you, but you can be a likeable person, the way that you do that is to serve people. Help them better themselves and in the process you better yourself. You learn valuable skills like patients and empathy both go a long way and people see them in your actions. When people know you are a genuinely good person not acting in self interests they are more likely to genuinely like you both on and off line. The original poster is right, the quest for karma or any other recognition is a self serving quest, the fruits of which are always tasteless and unrewarding because they are a quest for acceptance hidden behind a trinket. Once you receive the trinket the acceptance for that act is gone and you are left in the same state you where before that. It's akin to a drug and it can become addictive, because it is not permanent, the high of momentary acceptance fades and you are back on the treadmill. Now if you contrast this with genuinely improving someone's life then every time you see the person you have helped in a better state you see the trophies of your accomplishments and is far more rewarding.
- websitescenes 13y ago
  Spot on again! You guys are painting a real nice picture. I am definitely abandoning karma as a self worth indicator. I already kicked drugs and I don't want to start again.
- X4 13y ago
  Just in case it's not clear enough, @kls doesn't mean attributing one's life to someone else or someone specific, it can easily be mistaken for that. There would be enough people who'd love to profit from such naivety in that matter.
  - kls 13y ago
    Absolutely I am not suggesting being a door mat to people who would look to exploit you, or putting all your self worth into something external, helping to improve others is an internal quest, to perfect oneself. That being said, being kind to others and generous to others and the ones that reciprocate are people you want to help because they are the type of people that view the world as water lifts all boats and do not have the mentality of someone has to loose for them to win.

kls 13y ago

You can't make people like you, but you can be a likeable person, the way that you do that is to serve people. Help them better themselves and in the process you better yourself. You learn valuable skills like patients and empathy both go a long way and people see them in your actions. When people know you are a genuinely good person not acting in self interests they are more likely to genuinely like you both on and off line. The original poster is right, the quest for karma or any other recognition is a self serving quest, the fruits of which are always tasteless and unrewarding because they are a quest for acceptance hidden behind a trinket. Once you receive the trinket the acceptance for that act is gone and you are left in the same state you where before that. It's akin to a drug and it can become addictive, because it is not permanent, the high of momentary acceptance fades and you are back on the treadmill. Now if you contrast this with genuinely improving someone's life then every time you see the person you have helped in a better state you see the trophies of your accomplishments and is far more rewarding.

websitescenes 13y ago
Spot on again! You guys are painting a real nice picture. I am definitely abandoning karma as a self worth indicator. I already kicked drugs and I don't want to start again.
X4 13y ago
Just in case it's not clear enough, @kls doesn't mean attributing one's life to someone else or someone specific, it can easily be mistaken for that. There would be enough people who'd love to profit from such naivety in that matter.
- kls 13y ago
  Absolutely I am not suggesting being a door mat to people who would look to exploit you, or putting all your self worth into something external, helping to improve others is an internal quest, to perfect oneself. That being said, being kind to others and generous to others and the ones that reciprocate are people you want to help because they are the type of people that view the world as water lifts all boats and do not have the mentality of someone has to loose for them to win.