4 ms·

Remember kids, if you work hard, sacrifice, and have parents with a spare house in Tahoe they can lend you rent-free indefinitely, you too can make it as a prog

by seldo 13y ago

Remember kids, if you work hard, sacrifice, and have parents with a spare house in Tahoe they can lend you rent-free indefinitely, you too can make it as a programmer.

eshvk 13y ago
shrugs Everyone has advantages. You being born in the U.S. or having the ability to work in the U.S. is an advantage. Hell, whatever shit that happened to you in your life that made you who you are today, that makes you wake up everyday and decide to work (whilst your fellow man sits drinking a beer and bemoans the lazy Mexican stealing his job) is an advantage. (Although, I would fucking love a family with a spare house in Tahoe. )
javert 13y ago
There may be something to that, but it's kind of unrelated to the article. The article claims to be about sacrifice, but it's actually about pursuing happiness. And his lesson in pursuing happiness is pretty universal: Be willing to make very big life changes in the pursuit of happiness, and supposed "obligations" to others are never significant enough to sacrifice your happiness to. P.S. In anticipation of a potential criticism of this, no, having children is not a "sacrifice." Do it because it makes you happy to do it. If it's a sacrifice, you're doing it wrong.
hkmurakami 13y ago
Pretty sure he would have found a way even without these advantages. Might have taken a longer time, might have been a pretty ugly show, but once the conviction the hardest part was over.
Udo 13y ago
Who your parents are and who you know is a big determinant of what you're going to do with your life. I don't see anything wrong with using these resources if they're available. Also, as a European, I am continually amazed by the low, low real estate prices in some parts of the US. There are very nice big rural properties that even I could afford without a lot of hassle. I must admit I've actually toyed with the idea of buying one, but to make it full circle with the article, decided against it because I thought it would be utterly unfair to my cat (she suffers enough absences as it is) - I realized that she has very little time left and that we're going to make the best of it :)
- beat 13y ago
  More than just who your parents are... who your role models are. Who are the most successful adults you know when growing up as a child, what are they doing with their lives, and how did they get there? I grew up in a poor, uneducated family. The only wealthy/successful people I met were people my dad worked for, and he had nothing but contempt for them generally. It wasn't until I went to college that I really started meeting people who made something of themselves. My sense of scope, of what I can do on my own, has grown with the kinds of people I know. I left the limitations of my childhood behind long ago.
drewcoo 13y ago
Your point is really snarky. I also don't like that he tried to externalize his decisions, though. His dog made him do it? Oh, look - I'm being snarky now, but that's what I got out of it. I actually respect him for explaining his motives and position even if I don't agree with him. Everybody acts irrationally and we rarely admit it openly.
- asciimo 13y ago
  He admits in the article that the Guiding Paw of Deimos is a disingenuous story; in truth he was dissatisfied with his career path. He motivated himself by being accountable to an external party, a psychological "hack" that works for many people.
Heliosmaster 13y ago
I can't understand the general hostility toward getting (financial) help from your parents or living with them until you are financially independent, even after 18/25/30. I know I am biased as an italian (and pretty much adhere to the true stereotype) but I can't find anything wrong from getting help from the people that brought you in this world and which probably love you more than anyone else on the planet (and therefore have more reasons to do so). There's no shame in getting helped.
- eshvk 13y ago
  > I can't understand the general hostility toward getting (financial) help from your parents or living with them until you are financially independent, even after 18/25/30. Personally, I never had that support structure and had to figure out my shit the hard way; that doesn't mean I was never helped by people, it simply means that I had to work harder to get help. This means that I find it mildly annoying when those hoops are skipped easily by people who can run to mommy and daddy when things go bad. > I know I am biased as an italian There is a cultural element to it. I am of Indian origin; those people are big on the family support structure thing. I think it gets way too codependent. On the other hand, America has both kinds: There are enough people who run to daddy to handle their credit card bills. There also is this Randian image of a hero who arises magically from the dust and conquers everything.
- ebiester 13y ago
  To me, I think of it as this: it's great that the author was able to get help like this. What about people who have poor parents? Or worse, abusive parents or no parents at all? I know, "life is unfair," but what if we, as a society, can do better?
- rmrfrmrf 13y ago
  My issue is with the title more than anything. Sacrificed everything? This guy has traveled the world, was able to dump truckloads of money into 2 rounds of post-graduate study, and was finally able to throw it all away and live in his parents' house in the name of changing his career path. Sacrifice is about hardship, tough decisions, and tangible loss, not about your parents shaking their heads and wagging their fingers at you. I'd argue that this guy's parents sacrificed more than he ever did just to give him the privilege of saying that he "sacrificed everything".

by seldo 13y ago

Remember kids, if you work hard, sacrifice, and have parents with a spare house in Tahoe they can lend you rent-free indefinitely, you too can make it as a programmer.

eshvk 13y ago

shrugs Everyone has advantages. You being born in the U.S. or having the ability to work in the U.S. is an advantage. Hell, whatever shit that happened to you in your life that made you who you are today, that makes you wake up everyday and decide to work (whilst your fellow man sits drinking a beer and bemoans the lazy Mexican stealing his job) is an advantage. (Although, I would fucking love a family with a spare house in Tahoe. )

javert 13y ago

There may be something to that, but it's kind of unrelated to the article. The article claims to be about sacrifice, but it's actually about pursuing happiness. And his lesson in pursuing happiness is pretty universal: Be willing to make very big life changes in the pursuit of happiness, and supposed "obligations" to others are never significant enough to sacrifice your happiness to. P.S. In anticipation of a potential criticism of this, no, having children is not a "sacrifice." Do it because it makes you happy to do it. If it's a sacrifice, you're doing it wrong.

hkmurakami 13y ago

Pretty sure he would have found a way even without these advantages. Might have taken a longer time, might have been a pretty ugly show, but once the conviction the hardest part was over.

Udo 13y ago

Who your parents are and who you know is a big determinant of what you're going to do with your life. I don't see anything wrong with using these resources if they're available. Also, as a European, I am continually amazed by the low, low real estate prices in some parts of the US. There are very nice big rural properties that even I could afford without a lot of hassle. I must admit I've actually toyed with the idea of buying one, but to make it full circle with the article, decided against it because I thought it would be utterly unfair to my cat (she suffers enough absences as it is) - I realized that she has very little time left and that we're going to make the best of it :)

beat 13y ago
More than just who your parents are... who your role models are. Who are the most successful adults you know when growing up as a child, what are they doing with their lives, and how did they get there? I grew up in a poor, uneducated family. The only wealthy/successful people I met were people my dad worked for, and he had nothing but contempt for them generally. It wasn't until I went to college that I really started meeting people who made something of themselves. My sense of scope, of what I can do on my own, has grown with the kinds of people I know. I left the limitations of my childhood behind long ago.

drewcoo 13y ago

Your point is really snarky. I also don't like that he tried to externalize his decisions, though. His dog made him do it? Oh, look - I'm being snarky now, but that's what I got out of it. I actually respect him for explaining his motives and position even if I don't agree with him. Everybody acts irrationally and we rarely admit it openly.

asciimo 13y ago
He admits in the article that the Guiding Paw of Deimos is a disingenuous story; in truth he was dissatisfied with his career path. He motivated himself by being accountable to an external party, a psychological "hack" that works for many people.

Heliosmaster 13y ago

I can't understand the general hostility toward getting (financial) help from your parents or living with them until you are financially independent, even after 18/25/30. I know I am biased as an italian (and pretty much adhere to the true stereotype) but I can't find anything wrong from getting help from the people that brought you in this world and which probably love you more than anyone else on the planet (and therefore have more reasons to do so). There's no shame in getting helped.

eshvk 13y ago
> I can't understand the general hostility toward getting (financial) help from your parents or living with them until you are financially independent, even after 18/25/30. Personally, I never had that support structure and had to figure out my shit the hard way; that doesn't mean I was never helped by people, it simply means that I had to work harder to get help. This means that I find it mildly annoying when those hoops are skipped easily by people who can run to mommy and daddy when things go bad. > I know I am biased as an italian There is a cultural element to it. I am of Indian origin; those people are big on the family support structure thing. I think it gets way too codependent. On the other hand, America has both kinds: There are enough people who run to daddy to handle their credit card bills. There also is this Randian image of a hero who arises magically from the dust and conquers everything.
ebiester 13y ago
To me, I think of it as this: it's great that the author was able to get help like this. What about people who have poor parents? Or worse, abusive parents or no parents at all? I know, "life is unfair," but what if we, as a society, can do better?
rmrfrmrf 13y ago
My issue is with the title more than anything. Sacrificed everything? This guy has traveled the world, was able to dump truckloads of money into 2 rounds of post-graduate study, and was finally able to throw it all away and live in his parents' house in the name of changing his career path. Sacrifice is about hardship, tough decisions, and tangible loss, not about your parents shaking their heads and wagging their fingers at you. I'd argue that this guy's parents sacrificed more than he ever did just to give him the privilege of saying that he "sacrificed everything".