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Okay, I'm not really sure what to ask, maybe this will make sense? I completely agree that life doesn't carry any _inherent_ meaning and I frequently finding m

by shoe 13y ago

Okay, I'm not really sure what to ask, maybe this will make sense? I completely agree that life doesn't carry any _inherent_ meaning and I frequently finding myself faking emotions and mostly just reacting in the way others react in social situations. It's like existential-introversion-apathy. I have so many ideas, and things I want to learn and do, yet I'm too content in apathy to act on many of them. I'm in a good job, but when it comes to my personal life I mostly have a blank stare to respond with. Really, I haven't felt like I've been living for myself for a long time. If it weren't for my girlfriend and my family and knowing that they would be completely broken if I wasn't here, I'm not sure I would still be here. I guess this sounds worrisome, but I've felt like this for the past 6 years and have managed so far. It got worse after college, but now I feel like I'm at a lower equilibrium. I've thought about doing something about this, but I really have no idea. I mostly feel _guilty_ that I even have this "problem". Are these feelings and thinking patterns really a problem? What can be done about them, if anything? I'm a young 20s working male in America. That's a hell of a good dice roll in the global humanity game which is why I feel guilty even writing and talking about this. I don't know, is this a broken way of thinking?

gordaco 13y ago
> Really, I haven't felt like I've been living for myself for a long time. If it weren't for my girlfriend and my family and knowing that they would be completely broken if I wasn't here, I'm not sure I would still be here. This hits home. I've been there for about 14 or 15 years. Not so long ago I realized that this was a form of implicit emotional blackmail, which is a very hard situation, because, while it certainly works indistinguishably from standard emotional blackmail, it's not done knowingly or maliciously. I've ended up feeling like I don't own my life... again, not a good situation to be in.
spion 13y ago
You shouldn't feel guilty about the dice thing. I think us who live at developing countries on average have it easier when it comes to depression. Our problems are easier to identify and we sometimes even use them to explain our other unrelated problems. Besides we know that developed countries have managed to fix them so there is hope that we might be able to, too, giving us some lofty-looking goals to achieve.
eatitraw 13y ago
It sound like you may be depressed. My usual advice boils down to these three things that I posted in this thread: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=5685599 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=5685599 Or another version of this advice in one of the previous threads(https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=5576320 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=5576320)

by shoe 13y ago

gordaco 13y ago

> Really, I haven't felt like I've been living for myself for a long time. If it weren't for my girlfriend and my family and knowing that they would be completely broken if I wasn't here, I'm not sure I would still be here. This hits home. I've been there for about 14 or 15 years. Not so long ago I realized that this was a form of implicit emotional blackmail, which is a very hard situation, because, while it certainly works indistinguishably from standard emotional blackmail, it's not done knowingly or maliciously. I've ended up feeling like I don't own my life... again, not a good situation to be in.

spion 13y ago

You shouldn't feel guilty about the dice thing. I think us who live at developing countries on average have it easier when it comes to depression. Our problems are easier to identify and we sometimes even use them to explain our other unrelated problems. Besides we know that developed countries have managed to fix them so there is hope that we might be able to, too, giving us some lofty-looking goals to achieve.

eatitraw 13y ago

It sound like you may be depressed. My usual advice boils down to these three things that I posted in this thread: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=5685599 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=5685599 Or another version of this advice in one of the previous threads(https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=5576320 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=5576320)