6 ms·
I don't speak much about my experience with depression but I avoid it namely because it's hard to describe to people the emotions you feel as you "deal" with it
by afreak 13y ago
I don't speak much about my experience with depression but I avoid it namely because it's hard to describe to people the emotions you feel as you "deal" with it.
For about a decade I had noticed a behaviour in my mood and it caused a great deal of grief for my friends, those I worked with, and most importantly myself. It never really prevented me from holding down a job, but it very much delayed me from achieving certain things in my life that I have only recently started to attain. I blame my leaving post-secondary school early partly because of the fact that I could not cope with the demands that it brought upon me as well as the fact that I was losing a lot of interest in things that I once had some level of passion for before.
It was never destructive to the point where I wanted to go and kill myself--although there were fleeting moments where I questioned the validity of such an action. However, it definitely brought me down a few notches and it was only when I began to approach the issue seriously that I found myself on the road to actually recovering. I had to let go of certain things to get to this point and it was only by opening up to a select few people did I find myself going down a path to better things.
Years of treatment and some self-exploration has brought a level of calm to my life--I haven't seen a doctor about the issue in about three years now. I avoided using it as a crutch in my relationships with people (even when I knew it was probably a part of the tension), but I was less and less uncomfortable telling people once I knew that it wasn't all in my head so to speak. With that said, not everyone understands depression but I cannot condemn them for it because it's a rather convoluted and complex thing to explain. Hell, I don't even know what I am writing here to say the least.
Allie's statements definitely resonated with me and I'm glad to see her writing again because her previous post about depression made me think about how things were going mid-treatment. There is no real "cure" to depression but I do think that there is a certain level of exploration that is needed to be done to sort of make the whole issue less of a barrier to what you want to accomplish. Even to this day I still have to struggle with certain aspects of it, but I understand now after so many years of pain that it can be defeated or at the very least put at bay.
- aortega 13y ago>There is no real "cure" to depression Not now, but there will be one. IMHO symptoms of depression don't seem as something "psychological" or some trauma. They do not make any sense, and do not help survival of the individual. They seem more like a malfunctioning machine, some chemical missing in the brain. Smart people will figure it out some day, and cure it like they did with many other diseases before. EDIT: do not want to sound like a cheap self-help book, this is my opinion from observing depressed people, and working with lots of malfunctioning machines :)
- initself 13y agoThe cure to depression is a) calm the mind via the breath and once that is complete, usually after days of effort, and b) to observe your physical sensations from moment to moment without reacting to them in order to see Reality as it is.
- saraid216 13y agoThe. Fishes. Are. Dead.
- kibibu 13y agoIs this a reference to something? Google returns naught.
- claudius 13y agoYes, the comic.
- aduitsis 13y agojust a guess : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2_%2B_2_%3D_5#In_popular_culture http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2_%2B_2_%3D_5#In_popular_cultur... There.Are.Four.Lights
- intended 13y agoI suspect you didn't read the article.
- kibibu 13y agoApologies, I got a way through it and gave up. I don't take content in comic form very well.
- aortega 13y agoMaybe you were just tired.
- 13y ago
- gillianseed 13y ago>as well as the fact that I was losing a lot of interest in things that I once had some level of passion for before. This is something I recall as what I think was the onset of depression for me a couple of years back, thankfully it didn't develop past that into what I regard as 'real' depression (based upon what I've heard it described as). As such I bounced back from what I would descibe as a stressed and dispassionate state where nothing felt interesting/fun, I couldn't focus on anything and my body was in a weird state of constant anxiety (which also led to sleep issues). Anyway, it just turned around slowly and I came back to being 'myself', starting to enjoy things (life) again. I estimate this took place during a two-three month period, and while I can't really recall how I actually 'felt' back then (perhaps some self-defence mechanism) I do remember that odd realisation of not caring the slightest for things which I normally love/find really interesting. I never really got to the 'root' of why I felt the way I did (although I have my suspicions), but I feel (perhaps foolishly) that it's best to let sleeping dogs lie.
- afreak 13y agoI think that it is normal to have bouts that mimic depression and it's very fortunate that these bouts are recoverable. The real problem is when these bouts ended up plateauing and interfere long-term with how things happen internally and externally. In my case I found that there were certain life events that definitely didn't help with me digging out of my hole (death, disputes, etc), but I'd want to avoid blaming any single cause. With that said, it took me a while to speak out because a part of me didn't want to come off as an attention seeker during the worst of this all. I don't think there is a "root" cause in the end but I do feel that certain life events influence you into falling into that horrid rut.